To withdraw DD from being weighed at school?

[SeaDevilscanPlay]

DH thinks I am making a big fuss about nothing.

I refused consent for DD to be weighed at school as I don't think its neccesary. I didn't make a fuss, just ticked the box saying that I did not give consent.

Should add before anyone accuses me of being in denial, DD has recently been discharged from a series of investigative procedures at the local hospital with a clean bill of health and a letter stating that her height/weight are in proportion and within normal range for her age

Then you have absolutely nothing to worry about. If her bmi is in the normal range then nothing will happen. If it is a bit over because of her build, then the most that will happen is that a nurse will contact you to ask if you'd like a chat about you dd's weight and you can say exactly this. And tbh it is unlikely anyone will get in touch, it will be simply written in a letter than you can bin without your dd seeing.

I do the school dental surveys. We take them in groups. No-one singled out then. One of the principles of consent is that it is freely given ie no coercion or disadvantage if you do not agree.

Annie - do you really think that children don't notice that every other child is taken out and they aren't? Children are generally pretty observant about such things!

But Gold surely you can see that that is easier said than done. Children notice these things no matter what is done.

I only expect them not to make a song and dance about it. I do not expect them to keep it a secret!

But if they get taken in groups surely someone will ask the teacher why so and so didn't go? I know that in my class a couple of the bright kids who think that they are being very nice and helpful would say to me if someone has been missed out, and it would almost certainly be after putting their hand up and announcing it across the classroom.

...and no need to have her weighed at school when I have a perfectly good set of scales at home and know that she's fine.

Tbh by the time she's in Year 6 she can make her own mind up, if she's desperate to get weighed for the sake of 'not being different' then I'll shake my head in despair and let her get on with it.

as I said previously, none of mine have had permission for any of the school checks.

Not one of them has noticed/mentioned it/been upset that they've been "left out" of having something done to them.

kids go in and out of their classes for various reasons a lot during the day, I very much doubt it's noteworthy.
I know for a fact that they don't march them ALL out at once to stand around waiting their turn in the hall for the checks to be done because I've been helping in school while one lot was done. Children were taken out individually.

so, in the 2 schools I've experience of, this hasn't been the slightest issue

to invent elaborate procedures for hiding a child away from the rest of the class

Seriously?

"x and y could you take this book to Mrs z in the class 4 please?" or "Everybody line up please. x and y could you just tidy up the bookcase for me please?" Hardly elaborate.

There again you could decide that was too difficult and stand them at the side of the room while the others get weighed. I trust my DD's school to have more sense.

I have a feeling though that the majority of parents with overweight children will opt out of this test- because I'm pretty sure most of them do know full well there's a problem. So how exactly does this programme help?

(Round here, I think honestly there are far more health issues caused by under-weight people than over-weight, though this is not the case in some areas of course)

Sirzy, you have misunderstood me. It's not about keeping it secret from the child not participating, more not making it obvious to the rest of the class.

Add message | Report | Message poster Catsnotrats Thu 21-Nov-13 21:07:06
But if they get taken in groups surely someone will ask the teacher why so and so didn't go? I know that in my class a couple of the bright kids who think that they are being very nice and helpful would say to me if someone has been missed out, and it would almost certainly be after putting their hand up and announcing it across the classroom.

Then you shrug and say " they don't need to see everyone" and don't make a big deal.

All the people saying "I know my child is fine"....

Even if it is true and they are fine, the Government and NHS still need these statistics.

They need to plan ahead, to know which services to provide in the future, in which areas and how much money is likely to be needed etc.

It's nothing personal at all and I don't know why people take it as a personal slight.

Exactly Annie. There are ways of playing it down.

Anniemousse Children aren't daft.

They will know a bit about the NWM programme, especially by year 6.

Many of them will see straight through the "They don't need to see everyone" excuse.

And you think children will leave it at that and not talk about it? Children aren't daft and no matter what is done they will in most cases realise they have "missed out". Some won't care, others will.

Gold I don't think you'd actually have an issue with me if I was your dd's teacher in real life. Hopefully you'd come and have a quiet word when the letter went out saying that your dd's going to get upset by the weighing so you don't want her to do it (and you send the slip back so the health authority know you've refused consent) and me being a nice and understanding teacher who knows your dd well would also know it would upset her. I'd then remember this on the day of the weighing and find some alternative for her for a bit because I know in advance.

The issue that I can see arising (which hasn't yet because in 4 years I've not had any child removed), is that a parent refuses consent which I won't know about in advance because it doesn't come to me before the weighing and then I'd have to deal with it then and there in front of the whole class.

Unfortunately the geography of our school means we can't do one out of a class at a time, we do need to go on masse so that the children are properly supervised and we can get through it all in the very limited time the nurse is in school for.

Even if it is true and they are fine, the Government and NHS still need these statistics.

Not at the expense of my child's emotional well-being.

Many of them will see straight through the "They don't need to see everyone" excuse.

So, if they do and they make a fuss the teacher can deal with it appropriately can't they? That doesn't excuse the teacher making any effort to make minimal fuss does it?

Nobody is expecting a magic trick here. Just common sense!

As a school nurse, in my experience there is a number of parents who refuse consent for their child to be part of the NCMP. I think this is a shame for those in reception who miss out on the hearing test that is a part of it, and I can't understand why any parent would refuse a non invasive basic screening test? When it comes to the height and weight data, not only does it flag up any children whose familes might benefit from advice or support, it also informs public health data which goes towards funding and resource allocation decisions.
We ensure that the Year 6 children do not see the reading on the scale so are unaware of what they weigh and so won't be comparing notes etc. I understand why people don't want their child to be obsessively worrying about their weight, however excluding them makes more of an issue of it in my opinion. In addition, when the letters are sent out with the results on, they are addressed to the parents, so a child shouldn't necessarily know that they had been deemed over or under weight unless the parent had shared this information with them?!

Exactly Goldmandra It's not a top secret operation.

Catsnotrats described a process which obviously singled out the non participants. A few suggestions have been given as to how to make it less obvious.

Yes, Catsnotrats, I would appreciate your approach and I'm sure you're also able to send a child to the office for a few minutes. It doesn't take a lot of arranging - you simply agree with the office staff, or other appropriate person that you'll send and child not included to them at that point and they'll keep them until it's over.

And you think children will leave it at that and not talk about it?
Who has said they think that? Children will be children, of course. The teacher can still allow the child to be elsewhere while the weighing is done.

I understand why people don't want their child to be obsessively worrying about their weight, however excluding them makes more of an issue of it in my opinion.

I think the parents are best place to make that decision as they actually know their own child.

Ellebelly and your team hopefully don't slap stickers on them all saying yay 33% off!

I can't understand why any parent would refuse a non invasive basic screening test?
Here are a few valid reasons:
They've already been screened
They have a medical condition which is under management
They are phobic of medical personnel due to complex medical or pyschological problems
The parents don't trust the medical personnel not to do or say something daft (see above)
The parents don't trust the reliability of the data sytems and confidentiality of their child's data

Those specific reasons are fair enough, however in my experience there have been several children who had been excluded from this screening, and then later

I support gp doing this but not some random nurse. I'm not comfortable with the excuse of Gov statistics either. I don't like statistics, they lie regularly based on whose controlling them.

I will refuse. I don't do red book weights either. Pile O crap.

I'm not interested in their conclusions of my childrens weights. If I'm going to bin the letter anyway then I'd prefer they didn't do it at all. I fully expect them to deal with that perfectly reasonable request in a way that doesn't make them feel uncomfortable, rather than relying on peer pressure to push unwilling parents to allow participation. I dont send them to school to be dragged into sweeping surveys about their weight. I have nothing but their best interests at heart and know what I'm doing regarding their diet, health and wellbeing. I dont need a patronisng generic letter arriving via the bookbag telling me otherwise because they happen to appear somewhere on a chart that doesn't take into account that they are naturally slightly built and have no issues whatsoever regarding food, diet or their health. However if I was in any way concerned, I'd take them straight to the doctor for a private individual consultation that would doubtless take into account many more factors than the school mass weigh in. As it happens though, my younger dc didn't give two hoots who thought what about not being included as they knew my feelings about it and are confident that they are fine without requiring the thumbs up from the school nurse.

I don't understand why being weighed would be detrimental to a child's emotional well-being unless they already had issues around being weighed communicated to them in some way...by their parents?

My DS is in reception and will be weighed. He hasn't the faintest idea about how weight links with being fat, why would he?