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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Children on a school trip allowed to pet my dog... I'm bloody LIVID.

299 replies

HarderToKidnap · 15/11/2013 12:38

Should I phone the school about this? Every week I walk up to a local cafe with dog and toddler DS. I secure dog to pushchair on a short lead, he tucks himself behind the pushchair and snoozes in the sun. DS and I have cake and tea and sit by window so I'm next to dog, who is outside.

Today lots of primary school kids were out on a trip going from shop to shop collecting money for something. They went in the cafe before me and they left as I arrived. I placed my order, turned round to look at dog out of window and there must have been ten or twelve children crowded round him stroking him. He was covered in children. Teacher next to them smiling benignly and agreeing with kids how cute he was.

Dog is ten year old toy breed, is very cute but also very very nervous of children and has snapped at kids before. I never let unknown children stroke him. I was LIVID. For on,e he could easily have bitten one of the children and then they would be hurt and he may be put down. For two, who in their right mind lets lots and lots of children crowd an unknown dog???? I marched out there, said loudly "he doesn't like children and they shouldn't be touching him without asking the owners permission!" I was quite sharp but not snouty. Teacher said "yes yes OK" without really making eye contact and shepherded them off.

Should I phone the school concerned? Or was my sharp comment enough? Dogs are left unattended outside shops etc quite often and really the teacher should never be allowing the children in her charge to touch them, let alone crowd them. AIBU?

OP posts:
Rewindtimeplease · 15/11/2013 13:05

if it was a human being that was likely to get nervous and possibly get aggressive if touched, then they would be sectioned. So why should a dog be allowed to behave like that and for there to not be precautionary measures in place?

Original poster
HarderToKidnap · 15/11/2013 13:06

My dog has never bitten anyone. He could start now, of course, as could any dog. An argument to muzzle my dog is an argument to muzzle all dogs, which is an interesting point for debate, but not really what I'm asking. Buggy was empty by the way, DS was in cafe with me.

OP posts:
pianodoodle · 15/11/2013 13:06

We walk past dogs tied up outside shops all the time. Also dogs sleeping quietly under pub tables.

I don't like leaving mine outside shops because people have been known to steal pedigree dogs under those circumstances.

I don't think anything of seeing a dog waiting by the door though. I don't see it as unreasonable necessarily.

Probably because I'm not stupid enough to go poking about at it.

It's a risk the owner takes though as the dog is their responsibility.

It would be interesting to know who takes responsibility if the child hurts the dog due their meddling rather than the dog biting the child.

I think some parents hold the view that everything else must be controlled to a completely risk free extent to save them the bother of having their child under control ;)

lottieandmia · 15/11/2013 13:07

There is no way a teacher should ever let children pet an unknown dog but I agree with others that you shouldn't leave him alone if he has snapped at people before, whatever the previous circumstances. The responsibility lies more with you than with anyone else. If the dog bites someone even one time then he will have to be put to sleep so why would you not muzzle him?

Shopgirl1 · 15/11/2013 13:07

I think it was very irresponsible to leave your dog alone like that, I would never leave my dog unattended, the dog is an animal at the end of the day and could snap if scared, why take the risk?

I would not blame the children, the teacher was in the wrong, but you created the situation.

eightandthreequarters · 15/11/2013 13:08

And yet you needed to run out of the café to stop anyone (dog or human) being hurt. If your dog bites a child, it will not be viewed as the child's fault, nor the teacher's. It will be yours.

Gruntfuttock · 15/11/2013 13:08

I think it should be explained to children that if they approach a cute dog when the owner's not there and the dog bites them, the dog could be killed because of it (young children won't understand the phrase "put down"). That might make them think about how serious it is.

Original poster
HarderToKidnap · 15/11/2013 13:09

Also to note this a quiet parade of suburban shops, during the school day, in term time. If there were routinely large number of children there then of course I wouldn't leave him outside, but as no one has ever approached him in the last two years we've been doing this, it didn't cross my mind that ten kids would descend on him at once!

OP posts:
lardydahdydah · 15/11/2013 13:10

You don't have to muzzle your dog, but he will be destroyed if he bites anyone.

Is that a risk you are willing to take? Not if you can,aim to love your dog. He could have bitten those kids, and the outcome would still be that be was destroyed.

Elsiequadrille · 15/11/2013 13:10

You've done this for two years Shock

Gives up!

JustAnotherFucker · 15/11/2013 13:11

You are not doing dog owners any favours here by describing how you leave a dog outside a café OP Hmm It may be just the other side of the glass but you are not in control of it in the circs you describe. That's why you've ended up livid. Its your own fault.

lottieandmia · 15/11/2013 13:12

OP, you said that he has snapped at children before and you said 'he could easily have bitten one of the children' - how could you therefore also say there is no argument to muzzle him more than another dog?

HotCrossPun · 15/11/2013 13:12

This is all a bit silly. You are livid at the teacher allowing children to pat your dog in case it bit them.

But you don't think it's worth muzzling him because he has only snapped at children twice?

The teacher shouldn't have let the children pat a strange dog. You shouldn't be leaving a dog outside without a muzzle if he is nervous when being approached.

Take some responsibility and stop being such a drama llama.

WeileWeileWaile · 15/11/2013 13:12

Was it definitely a teacher with the children. I've been a parent helper on trips & the children have always referred to me as Mrs Waile, so you wouldn't know fromthe outside that I wasn't a teacher.

I only ask because a parent helper might not be listened to quite as much as a teacher or didn't feel able to instruct the children (not me. I'm bloody strident )

HotCrossPun · 15/11/2013 13:13

And to say the children 'mauled' him is very OTT.

Elsiequadrille · 15/11/2013 13:13

And Pre schoolers are about in term time, OP. It's really not worth the risk, to your dog or child, to place them in potential snapping situation - it isn't fair.

gamerchick · 15/11/2013 13:13

Now that it has happened. Maybe it's time to think what you would have done if it had bitten and been destroyed..... and do that now so it doesn't happen.

Gileswithachainsaw · 15/11/2013 13:14

Confused as to why you are hell bent on explaining your way out of taking responsible action.

If you have a nervous snappy dog then why the hell ever risk putting him in the situation where it could tip him over the edge. Walk him round your local field on a long lead and a muzzle. The muzzle is a warning to others to stay away as much as it is to protect your dog from causing harm and getting in trouble. Bit don't leave then unattended!! Ever.

HettiePetal · 15/11/2013 13:14

Look, if you don't want to muzzle your dog, then at least have the decency not to leave him unattended outside, accessible to young children.

Yes, of course, they shouldn't approach him. Yes, the teacher was irresponsible. Yes, it was a suburban street....but none of that is remotely relevant.

Sometimes children do things that are not wise - like pet strange dogs, because they're children. You have a responsibility to protect such children by making sure that there's no opportunity for them to be hurt by your dog.

Either muzzle him or stop leaving him unattended outside. Simple as that.

SharpLily · 15/11/2013 13:14

I think the point has been clearly made that the dog shouldn't have been left unattended. However this doesn't excuse the stupid teacher's behaviour. Children MUST be taught how to behave around animals - not just dogs and what sort of teacher thinks it's OK to crowd and pet a strange dog at all, let alone without speaking to the owner? I think a polite call to the school would be worthwhile, with a view to educating the children for their own good in the future.

flowery · 15/11/2013 13:14

"An argument to muzzle my dog is an argument to muzzle all dogs"

Er, no it isn't. Because not all dogs are "very, very nervous of children and has snapped at kids before". Mine loves children and has never snapped at anyone. Not that I'd leave him unattended anyway.

If your dog is cute-looking (therefore more likely to be petted) and nervous of children and liable to snap at them, it's absolutely daft to leave him outside unattended and unmuzzled, I mean seriously!

pianodoodle · 15/11/2013 13:17

You've done this for two years

Gives up

Why is this so shocking? I've seen a lot of shocking things out and about but a dog lying under a buggy outside a cafe wouldn't make me do a double take Grin

It's fine to tell the OP not to do it etc... but the fact is lots of people do.

It's a common sight, so its best to be prepared and teach children not to approach. Yes if they get bitten it is the dog owner's fault, but that's not going to be much comfort to the child.

Fakebook · 15/11/2013 13:17

You left a dog that can get nervous and snappy at children outside alone tied to a pushchair? YABU. If you don't want your dog touched then keep it with you or put a muzzle on it.

DoItTooJulia · 15/11/2013 13:18

My favourite kind of AIBU.

Lots of posters: YABU and actually irresponsible.

OP: No I'm not.

Why ask?

Floggingmolly · 15/11/2013 13:18

You let 10 or 12 children gather round him before you noticed; ergo your prone to snapping dog was outside unsupervised for an unacceptable amount of time.