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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that you should not lie your baby down on her changing mat and change her nappy on the floor in the middle of a crowded exhibition hall?

286 replies

Mintyy · 09/11/2013 15:32

I expect I'll get some yanbus as I've seen people attempting to justify changing nappies in restaurants and libraries before now.

But, it's just really not on, is it?

OP posts:
Bumblequeen · 09/11/2013 21:23

I saw a woman changing her son's pooey nappy on her lap in a cafe. I walked passed and saw the whole contents of his nappy. The tables were so close together. The woman chatted away to her friend oblivious of her actions.

Bluestocking · 09/11/2013 21:30

AnyoneforTurps, I think some people are under the impression that as long as they didn't actually get any visible shit on their hands, they are maintaining good hygiene. BOAK.

PrincessFlirtyPants · 09/11/2013 22:11

When I go to the toilet I manage not to get shit on my hands, however, I still wash my hands after.

Why would it be any different with a baby's nappy?!

Confused
needaholidaynow · 09/11/2013 22:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OutragedFromLeeds · 09/11/2013 22:23

When you go to the toilet there is always a sink, isn't there?

If you really needed to go and there was a toilet, but no sink would you just not go? Or would you make do with wet wipes and antibacterial gel stuff?

If any of the DC's have a poo in their nappy I will change it as soon and as easily as possible. If that is somewhere with no immediate handwash facilities then so be it. There is no skin to skin contact when changing a nappy.

flatwhite · 09/11/2013 22:28

I often change my baby sons wee nappy in his buggy. It takes me like 20 secs. I usually extend buggy roof as far as it will go to create some privacy. Never really thought anything of it. Would never do This with poo nappy.
Also unpleasant when no changing facilities and need to change nappy on toilet floor.
The only time I had a comment about changing in public was when I changed nappy on lap on aeroplane and stewardess realised what I'd done when I put wee nappy in black sac she was passing around for rubbish- she told me that next time need to use changing facilities.

By time child is 1 would prob go somewhere more private tho ..

irishe · 09/11/2013 22:32

I honestly would not have a negative reaction to this. Sometimes desperate times call for desperate measures.

BranchingOut · 09/11/2013 22:49

Could it be the case that she had asked the owners/holders of the stand that it was ok? So as far as she was concerned she had found a quiet/discreet spot where she had permission to change her baby.

Just a thought.

misspontypine · 09/11/2013 22:51

Yabu.

It is poo that will be disposed of quickly. People often don't smell nice, cigarette smoke on clothing, bo.

My ds wiggles and squirms to the point where using high up changing tables are not an option. I need to pin him down by half lieing on non-profit and letting him think he is running away ( but actually he is just distracted by sucking the pushchair) I just couldn't change him in a public toilet, he'd suck the toilet and there wouldn't be enough room to restrain him.

We usually outside but if it is too cold or inconvenient I change him inside.

josephinebruce · 09/11/2013 23:10

There is no excuse ever. It is disgusting.
But then, I can't stand seeing women getting their boobs out to breastfeed either.

PrincessFlirtyPants · 09/11/2013 23:24

I can't stand seeing women getting their boobs out to breastfeed either

That's a joke, right?

funnylittlekaty · 09/11/2013 23:38

Had to change ds a few months ago I the park as the cafe baby change was out of order and the other loos had no room. I couldn't change him on my knee (sounds like a wriggly disaster) as he's 2. Found a quiet corner outside behind a tree,changed him using the pushchair to give us a bit of privacy. Wouldn't ever change him in public if there were facilities or suitable size bogs, mainly because I don't think it's appropriate to show him off in all his glory to the general public , especially as he gets older. I don't think I'd bother about someone changing a newborn nappy near me (although not when eating!)...I'd probably rather that that screaming sad baby, but as they get older it's proper poo. Bad form.
Ps Josephine, your comment was designed to rile, yes?

CoffeeTea103 · 10/11/2013 00:26

Flatwhite- changing the nappy on the plane was just lazy. There were facilities provided.

JustRestingMyEyes · 10/11/2013 00:44

Needs must when the devilchild writhes.

I change nappies on demand.
I breastfeed on demand.
Try to do the former on a proper changing table. If not viable with a toddler in tow or no facilities nearby will make do and mend anywhere...if a humdinger/exploding diaper I try to find somewhere with an exclusion zone but sometimes shit happens.
I always avoid restaurants.
Breastfeed everywhere - if my tits get on your tits despite being discreet then tough tits.
I always avoid toilets where possible as bf on a toilet or toilet floor makes me highly uncomfortable Wink

ravenAK · 10/11/2013 00:44

Outdoors is OK - albeit preferably somewhere out of the way.

Indoors & in a public place - not nice, unless there's a seriously good reason why you can't find a loo & do it on your lap.

Anywhere that people are eating, or a confined space such as a train where the smell can't dissipate - no, sorry, that's disgusting & antisocial.

If there is a zombie apocalypse in progress & therefore no way of safely leaving the cafe or train carriage, OK. But don't expect to be popular.

ICantGoOverItICantGoUnderIt · 10/11/2013 00:45

Uggh, I think I did something a like this by accident once. It was my first time at baby group with DD and she needed changing. I was chatting to some mums and, as a force of habit, just changed her there and then without even thinking to ask if there were baby changing facilities (which of course there were, it being a baby group and all). Blush DD then proceeded to fill her nappy twice more in a row. I changed her nappy right there in the middle of baby group three times in the space of about ten minutes! Blush Blush

It only occurred to me the next day that a) no one else changed their baby in the middle of the floor and b) perhaps the other mums sipping their coffee and nibbling their biscuits might have liked to have been spared the sight and smell of DD's dirty nappy. In my defence, I was sleep deprived and had not been out in society in a couple of months.

Perhaps the mum in the OP was having a similar brain block?

IneedAsockamnesty · 10/11/2013 02:38

foreverondiet

You would have an issue with someone changing their own child in their own living room?

WhereIsMyHat · 10/11/2013 02:54

I have changed my third child's wee nappies on my lap in outdoor places, his two older brothers would be with me and off on some playground equipment. If there was an accessible toilet I would always use it and if a poi would always go somewhere private or in the car. But for a wee nappy, in a emergency (in a leak way) I would change on my lap if there were not facilities very close and I was on my own without another adult to look after the other two. For a poo we would all have to leave and do in in the toilets or the car.

To be honest though, now I am onto baby no.3 I tend to go to places I know suit having three small kids and mean things like this aren't a huge issue.

GrandstandingBlueTit · 10/11/2013 03:44

YANBU.

Some people really just do not have a clue..

FFS, why don't we all just whip out portable loos, squat down in the middle of an audience and back one out?

Because it's faeces, for God's sake....!? It belongs in the toilet. You know, that thing attached to a sewer...?

Just because it came out of your child's arse, doesn't mean it is any more acceptable than any other form of faeces to members of the general public.

Cop on, and accept that. The fact that plenty of the rest of us have negotiated children through nappydom and toilet training and not needed to expose the public to the contents of their bowels means it is possible. :)

neunundneunzigluftballons · 10/11/2013 03:54

My aunt had 11 kids she could change a terry cloth pinned nappy on the back of a stamp. Ok not literally but she would lie baby down on her lap and before you could say dib, dap, dob she was off with the nappy and on with the next one didn't matter what she was faced with. Makes me think it is just a question of practice but definitely not worth having all the babies to find out. The best I can offer is wet nappies for toddlers when they are standing up.

Mamagiraffe · 10/11/2013 04:09

Laughing because I think this might be aimed at me. Couldn't leave my friend on her own with a 4 week old to do the job, took moments, nappy was only wet ffs and I carry hand sanitiser. Happy?

FixItUpChappie · 10/11/2013 04:15

I often change mine in the stroller, in the trunk of my car, in the park etc but I would never do so in a café, eating area or amidst a bunch of people - always off to the side someplace. Some public toilets are a tip and frequently change tables look like they have never been cleaned a day since installation.

saladcreamwitheverything · 10/11/2013 04:31

Two years ago, I would probably have agreed with you

Now I have a 22 month DS

It does cause a stench, yes, but so do peoples farts

I'm not saying I'd change my DSs nappy in front of ALL those people but in desperate times:-)

AnyoneforTurps · 10/11/2013 08:27

A 22m child's pooey nappy is nothing like a fart, not even one of my lab's earth-shattering farts. Some of the YABU posters sound like smokers in denial about how much cigarettes pong to non-smokers.

As raven says, for the zombie apocalypse, you get a pass. Otherwise, accept that the public do not want to see or smell your child's shit.

ZombieMojaveWonderer · 10/11/2013 08:28

I would happily change my baby anywhere if needs be. I used to be an expert at covertly changing my children's nappy while she was laid on my lap without anyone seeing. Even dirty nappies and even when they were huge. I just had a knack for it. Friends used to get all panicked and embarrassed and I would have ready finished before they even got the nappy off. So for me I would do it and it wasn't some weird point making thing either.