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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU? DS was ill and the school have marked it as an unauthorised holiday and are threatening to fine me!

893 replies

WeAreEternal · 08/11/2013 14:23

A couple of weeks ago DS (7) had an upset stomach, he D&V over night and most of the next day.
First thing in the morning (a Thursday) I called the school and let them know he was ill.
He was feeling better by the evening but as he had D&V school policy is 24 hours off, so I kept him off Friday too.

I received a letter from to school yesterday saying that those days have been marked as an unauthoried holiday as "although we received a phone call from you stating that (DS) was ill, we are led to believe that DS was in fact on a holiday to XXXX on these two dates"

The letter goes on to say that if he was genuinely ill they expect me to provide evidence such as a doctors appointment card, a prescription, a medication receipt or something simmilar that can "verify my version of events".

I am a medical professional, I know when when my DS needs medication or to see a GP or when he just has a bit of a stomach bug and needs rest and fluids.
Who would take a child to the GP or buy medication for D&V anyway?

How on earth can I prove that DS was ill?
And why are they even querying this?
AIBU to think this is bloody ridiculous?

Anyone have any ideas?

OP posts:
AchyFox · 20/11/2013 13:41

I'm still curious as to what DS had to say about this.

You said that DS might have said something to them, but what has DS said when you've talked to him ?

BitOutOfPractice · 20/11/2013 13:41

It's so unbelievably shabby isn't it? I thought my DCs' school was shocking at communication but this really does take the biscuit!

DrinkFeckArseGirls · 20/11/2013 15:22

What? Still not response. They are taking the proverbial.

fondantfancypants · 20/11/2013 15:41

I've had to wait 4 weeks in the past for a response to a complaint which then basically denied everything that had happened. Admittedly op has the letter from them as proof so they won't be able to deny that or even say it was sent by mistake because of the particular details contained within it.
It will be very interesting to see how they respond. My guess is a phone call to avoid any admittance in writing, even though op has specifically requested a written response. They'll then probably write to say that further to the discussion the complaint has now been completed, again without putting actual facts in writing.
In my experience schools hate having to commit any response in writing that could put them in a bad light.

SlicedLemon · 20/11/2013 16:26

The OP may be out all day and not home to have received a response.

Assuming they have not one line to go in the letter to the LEA/Governors etc. must be

The school have failed to communicate with me .....

Yes FAILED a fab word for this useless bunch of knobbers!!!

Really do hope you have had something today mind WeAreEternal.

Jossysgiants · 20/11/2013 19:41

I cannot believe no response...I have been hoping you would get an apology.

Lambzig · 20/11/2013 19:58

I have been following this thread and am truly appalled that there has been no response.

Sort of shamelessly marking place, but lots of sympathy for the OP. My DC are too little for school yet, but I feel the balance of parental decision making versus school has swung too far.

nennypops · 20/11/2013 20:36

Right, if there's still no response you need to take this to the next step under their complaints policy - presumably going to the governors?

alranson · 20/11/2013 23:58

I have read the whole thread and have been pondering it for the last 24 hours.
My theory, for what it's worth, was that the school were on a fishing expedition. I reckon they've had a few suspected cases of holidays masquerading as "upset stomach" with some families in the last couple of months, and they've decided they need to start baiting the line, putting the frighteners on etc etc. Of course they don't have any solid evidence, apart from perhaps a casual misinterpreted or misheard remark about destination XXXX from your son. But I reckon they've tried a semi-educated guess before with other families and it's worked, so they've done it again with you. I don't think they dreamed you would take it so seriously, they are rather embarrassed that their fishing expedition has been rumbled, and they are panicking. I think you'll get a letter from someone saying it's all been an unfortunate misunderstanding, they hope you can understand why they need to be vigilant, absence has been changed to off sick.

ChasedByBees · 21/11/2013 00:02

I would take this further now too.

mummymeister · 21/11/2013 07:32

deadline has passed WeAreEternal. did they come back to you? what are the next steps? really hope they have and that we haven't heard from you because it has all been resolved.

friday16 · 21/11/2013 07:44

and they've decided they need to start baiting the line, putting the frighteners on etc etc

Why would a school do that? They're not the EWO. A parent presents a note saying that the child has been ill. The register is marked appropriately. What more does the school need to do, and why does it think it needs to do it? The school isn't responsible for investigating absence, authorised or otherwise, and it is certainly not responsible for checking the veracity of any notes that are presented. If the school believes that the notes that are being presented are fake, and believes that the interests of the child require this to be investigated, they should refer the matter to an EWO. And of course, if a child is off ill on a regular basis that is potentially a matter for an EWO even if the notes are absolutely genuine. But the school has no obligation to do anything other than take notes at face value.

TheSnowQueen · 21/11/2013 08:39

V

madoldbird · 21/11/2013 10:08

Hope you have a response from the school now, OP.

mummymeister · 21/11/2013 15:01

WeAreEternal where are you? everyone wants to know whats happened?

Rumplestiltskinismyname · 21/11/2013 15:52

Reading this thread has made me want to emigrate! Good luck to Weareeternal... I am hoping that you have had a full apology by now.

JulesJules · 21/11/2013 17:55

Hello? Hello?

tootiredtothink · 21/11/2013 21:34

no news yet???

trixymalixy · 21/11/2013 21:36

Ridiculous! I hope you have it sorted.

CSIJanner · 22/11/2013 08:12

Bump! Any news? Is the HT on MN and therefore has asked for updates to be withheld?

Jenny70 · 22/11/2013 08:15

OP is on holiday and can't get wifi? School has gagging order to stop her talking? children have D&V bug and she's taken them to school with stool sample to ensure this is signed off as sickness this time?

BitOutOfPractice · 22/11/2013 08:21

Jenny I sniggered at the the thought of the OP being on unauthorised holiday in term time Grin

Arohaitis · 22/11/2013 11:35

checking back for an update.........

TiaMariaandSpringCleaning · 22/11/2013 11:57

Hope you've had an apology by now!

Hopasholic · 22/11/2013 12:49

If you don't get a response eternal what's your next move?