DH says everybody keeps track of their finances by logging receipts

[shewhowines]

After another long night of DH huffing and puffing "doing the finances", we had the age old discussion of him saying he needs to, because that is the only way and most people do it like that (his mum does), and me saying 90% of people don't do it his way.

He makes me keep every receipt and he logs every single item we buy, on a complicated spreadsheet. He uses this to forecast our expenses so that he can transfer money if necessary. Can I just add, he is not controlling as to what I spend. It's just if I spend it, or get money out, I must keep the receipt. The system obviously works, but it is sooo time consuming. I wouldn't mind, but then I have to put up with him moaning.

I say that most people work retrospectively. They scan through their credit card bill to make sure there are no errors, and correlate this with their bank statement. Money can be transferred if necessary, at that point.

I am right aren't I? Nobody keeps their receipts and meticulously logs every bloody transaction.

We use YNAB - it doesn't just track spending, but it's also an envelope budgeting system. Wouldn't be without it.

I only ever carry notes around which helps. Two pound coins get saved twice a year for Christmas / Summer. One pound coins almost always end up at the DCs school. Fifty pences in the car for meter feeding and anything less for when I go over on petrol.

fifty pences for the meter??? you need a fucking mortgage down here in London to feed the meter

I know! I have to go to London for DC hospital appointments and in-patient care. Nearly bankrupted me before we got a blue badge

I always find it funny that my Mum did an exact account of her housekeeping money but her husband never kept detailed track of the full household accounts.

Oblomov -

If it's necessary at work, why is it unnecessary at home? I have a credit card and do a tax return there.

Its necessary in work for a few of reasons:

• because the people who own the business are very often not the people who run the business and therefore you are expected as custodian of their money to keep a grip on it at all times, that includes checking that no-one inside or outside the company is ripping it off or frittering it away by mistake.
• Additionally nearly all expenses in a business are deductible for tax and there is a legal requirement to keep adequate records.
• the business owners and managers want to know how the business is doing in order to make rational decision about how to run the business - that need good record keeping of costs and income in theory at least

As an individual you are perfectly entitled to fritter your own money away if you choose and as virtually no expenses are tax deductible you don't have to keep adequate records of them only your income which you pay tax on.

(Spot the accountant)

'But what people are describing here, for their home finances, are unnecessary, obsessive and OCD.'

Rather a sweeping statement. Just because it's unnecessary for you doesn't mean it is for everyone. You have no idea how obsessively I, or anyone else, do it. And I don't have OCD, though if I did I might be offended by you using that term in such a derogatory tone. In fact, I do think that's pretty offensive.

I have a spreadsheet and account for every receipt. Once logged on the spreadsheet I chuck the receipt unless I'm likely to need it. How do you keep track if you don't do this? Won't you run out of money if you aren't keeping account of expenditure?

People have assumed that everyone who tracks expenditure is doing it down to the last penny and it's time consuming. That's not the case in many cases where people have described using a set amount as 'spending' where it's not documented in detail but they have set a monthly ceiling on that expenditure.

Why don't we use bank statements...because as has been pointed out I'd need to check credit card statement and bank statement and if I wanted an overall view...2nd credit card account, mortgage account and savings account. People not using a money management software system talk about doing this daily or weekly and making a decision about whether to transfer funds or tighten spending until the end of the month.

As it is for me..My regular direct debits are set to record automatically on the bit of software I use (set up yearly and takes 30minutes?). Yearly bills which could get forgotten are scheduled in so no surprises when house insurance, car insurance, car tax, professional subscriptions drop out of the current account. I have never been overdrawn

The software links all accounts so credit card bill and current account automatically update when one is affected etc etc. I don't have to look in several places. It's all in one place. It also looks forward to the next month so I don't need to monitor regularly I know 31 days in advance how healthy my finances are.

I allow a generous sum for credit card bill and another buffer of money for cash withdrawals throughout the month. Then the only check I need to do is see if credit card or cash allowance is going to be used up.

I do log credit card purchases because my spending can vary by a significant amount. Knowing what is going to be a big month enables me to react to that. It also enables me to not penny pinch unless I need to because I know if I have the cash. I often accrue sums ready for a big month. That way I never ever get into trouble.

Penny pinching is not a crime anyway if it keeps your finances healthy. No one has endless finances and some people have finely balanced budgets

Recently I had a tax rebate. I'd been able to identify the rebate item with two clicks of a mouse and listed the sums I was claiming for the last 4 yrs. My bank First Direct is good but nowhere near as user friendly or fast.

It really is very simple to use and takes minimal time. I think the OPs DH needs to find a faster system but can then continue and feel in control of his money

Maybe it is to do with whether you have a head for money. I am still struggling to see the benefit of having everything recorded twice. People listing reasons for keeping receipts and detailed accounts talk about how it being useful to know where you are but don't you know that anyway without faffing about with recording every little thing? Obviously if you need to know to the penny writing it down is probably the way to go but if pinpoint accuracy isn't necessary then surely you carry the ballpark figure in your head?

We don't record everything, life is too short. We have never been overdrawn by accident and only once in a blue moon on purpose. We are both accountants though. Maybe that makes a difference. If you don't have a very good grasp on your money you might be better off writing it down to avoid surprises and muddles.

Also just to say, I would say a vast majority of the small businesseswe have as clients, including contractors and sole traders (so individuals managing their own finances really) don't write anything down. They provide us with their receipts and bank statements quarterly or annually depending on their VAT/tax position and we work out their final balances for tax purposes. Presumably they are all keeping a track of their finances via their bank/credit card statements too. I would say the Op is right that a vast majority do things her way.

oblomov here, it takes a few days for the online banking to show debits, so it tells us that we have more money than we actually have. By keeping an eye on our spending, we know what we have available, regardless of that the bank says. For some reason, banks here often take 2/3 day to show debits.

I don't think it is controlling to know what your bank balance is.

Exactly Bertha and OMG TheArcticFunky - why would you habitually overspend? You just need an idea of your means, helped by a budget for different categories if necessary, and the comprehension that you need to live within them.

EvilKitten, if you are doing a tax return, then it's business expenses, not household expenses.

It's the attitude and obsessiveness of it all that is quite OCD. I was the third of fourth person to mention this, but people seem to have taken offence that I, not the first three people , did say OCD.

Ad people seem to have missed all my previous posts. About budgeting, and forecasting.

So let me try again.

As OP said, here husband does it every evening, huffing and puffing.
Huffing and puffing?

You get the picture, e.g the man saying, but where's the receipt. I'm sorry she says, it didn't give me one, when I paid £5.50 for the parking meter.

But it is just not necessary these days. 15 years ago, maybe.
But you don't need to enter them onto excel these days.
Many people have said, they or their husbands do it everyday. Entering all the details onto excel. why?

You go onto the online bank. Or online credit card. Ad there is its. what you have spent today. You check it. you match it to the receipt. Job done. No typing necessary. No excel. The bank/credit card has done it for you.

many many posters, other than me, have pointed this out, but people still seem to be taking offence, that we are pointing, out that you are doing something unnecessary, because it has already been done for you.

Because these days , you can view everything on line.

I do a daily cash flow for work. I am saddened to think that people are doing them at home, for their home expenses. Looking at their daily bank balance and remembering/ noting down that the chq for the child's dance classes hasn't yet gone through.

In the olden days, you had no ide what your credit card total would be, until the statement arrived at the end of the month. But now you do. Because you can log on. Every day. And match those receipt. Spotting something that is not yours. No typing required.

But Op isn't poor is she? They aren't living to the penny.

If you have to live on a budget and only have £20 till the end of the month, then that is different. Maybe, you might draw the £20 out. And know that this was all you had until month end. hard. But lots of people need to do it this way.

But what Op has described is not this. It is an obsessive husband. Watching every penny. What have you spent? Are we going to be overdrawn?

How stressful.
Why are you living this way? Totally unnecessary.

Examine you old expenses. Decide to cut down on the coffee's and sandwiches. Budget and forecast. Maybe keep an eye on it weekly. If you must. Know that your DD for British gas, BT, and that big car service is coming out next Tuesday.

FINE. This is all fine. That's planning. Keeping an eye on things. NOT what the OP was describing.

But sitting there every day, asking your wife where she's been, has she got that receipt, did she remember to get that receipt?
What sort of life is that?

Sounds miserable. It IS miserable. Op told us it was, listening to her husband huffing and puffing.

"I don't think it is controlling to know what your bank balance is."

I don't either. I know what ours is.
But that is NOT what the OP was describing.

Oblomov it might be not necssary for you to use excel but it doesn't mean it is for everyone. I like to use excell so I deduct from my weekly food and household budget money I've already spent. If I don't do it I tend to overspent. Whether it's done on a piece of paper or excel is irrelevant.

I dob 'to huff and puff however

Overspend nor overspent.

I don't specifically have a problem with excel.
Take your bank statement, download it onto excel. Create a pivot table, if you like!!

But the type type typing, into excel, whilst huffing and puffing.
Yeah that bothers Me. Funnily enough.

26/10/13 Argos 24.99 drill for work

means typing roughly 34 letters including spaces. what a waste of time.

or copy and paste it into excel.

Why type?

A pattern is emerging. People saying that if they didn't track cash flow closely, they would overspend. They lack self-control or some sort of normal financial awareness and are compensating for this.

This excludes the few who've said they are on very, very tight budgets and really are managing cash flow, rather than needing to avoid overspending. Not the same thing.

This reminds me of a thread about people buying Christmas presents throughout the year. I think 'why wouldn't you just save the money, either in a savings account or just by increasing your current account balance over the year?'. Some people were on very tight budgets, budgeting carefully. Some though, said 'oh some people can't save, money burns a hole in their pocket'. I find that bizarre and irresponsible but maybe that is what some people here are (over)compensating for.

I don't track obsessively and I don't overspend but I do keep a record of what I spend using an app. That way I can spot patterns e.g. that DH and I were doing too many top up shops so our food shopping needed reorganising. We are not on a tight budget but if I am going to fritter £30 I'd prefer it to be on cinema with the kids than random crap that didn't give me half as much pleasure.

People don't just buy Xmas pressies during the year because they are short of cash or can't budget - they buy them when they are on offer - more bang for your buck - especially with interest rates so low, the saving on the gift will more than offset any lost interest.

Without repeating that thread, I did read the whole thing and what i just wrote is true - some people were budgeting carefully and getting bargains, some said they were incapable of keeping money in the bank, they had some sort of spending compulsion.

That issue seems to be emerging amongst some posters on this thread too.

Checking periodically and adjusting spending accordingly is really sensible and normal - and not what the OP and some similar posters are describing, at all.

We keep receipts for big items, and dh regularly checks bank and credit card statements. I check my own. We were scammed a few years back so that's why. He's the good one with money - he's overpaid our mortgage for the past ten years so we will be mortgage free at 46, where I would have spent the lot. So it does sound a bit anal but I'm glad he does it.

I felt your post came across as a bit judgmental. Calling people who struggle to manage money bizarre and irresponsible without knowing any of the background. Some people overeat to feel better, some people drink too much and some people spend to cheer themselves up. Without knowing why people struggle to control their money I would hesitate to use such negative labels.

I really don't struggle with my spending and we are very comfortable but when I had a bout of depression I certainly did buy things to cheer myself up ( it doesn't work but it wasn't bizarre or irresponsible).

I think it's fine, nay a jolly good idea, to keep a track of what you sepnd as a family, perhaps looking for waste.

But you have to be very careful that this doesn't tip into one person obsessively watching what the other spends and deciding if it's acceptable!