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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to refuse to view a house if I have to remove my shoes?

406 replies

iliketea · 04/11/2013 09:01

I'm happy to be told IABU....

We are currently house hunting. A few of the houses we've requested to view have asked us to remove our shoes at the door. At that point, I've said I'm not viewing a house in my socks and stopped the viewin before it's even started if the shoe thing is non-negotiable.

AIBU? it's not that i mind taking my shoes off when I'm visiting a friend - and generally do take my shoes in friends homes, but I find it weird that if you are trying to sell your house that you expect viewers to take their shoes off.

Or am I likely to miss a really great house and just suck it up / make sure i've got non-holey, matching socks wheb we go to view a house?

OP posts:
Grennie · 04/11/2013 11:40

harticus - Only on mumsnet obviously.

Actually, unless they have been a walk in a park, I think it is pretty rare for adults to have mud in their shoes. Most of us walk almost totally on pavements.

Flibbertyjibbet · 04/11/2013 11:41

When I grew up no one had cream carpets, so you couldn't even see dirt that was brought in, but we always always took our shoes off at the door and changed into our slippers, which were kept in the hall.

20 years ago I had a plain, pale blue carpet put in my living room (straight in from porch). The fitter said 'this is a brave choice for a living room'. It stayed clean because I kept my slippers by the door.

10 years later fitters don't think twice about putting wall to wall cream carpets in right up to the front door!

Gileswithachainsaw · 04/11/2013 11:42

My house is right buy a green. Dogs walk past frequently. The bus stop always has at least one poo by it, and the local cats shit in all the front gardens. Even those like us who have gravelled over it.

So yes dog and cat shit is a worry for me and I have two children id rather not have dog poo in the house thanks

Beastofburden · 04/11/2013 11:42

What do professional developers do in show homes? Shampoo every night?

I guess if I were selling and had nice carpets, I might buy a box of those blue shoe covers and offer them to viewers with a nice smile and a request to use them "as this house has been so popular, we are over-run with viewings and it's a shame to spoil the new carpets".

bigbrick · 04/11/2013 11:42

Get covers to go over your shoes if taking them off is a problem

MistAllChuckingFrighty · 04/11/2013 11:44

On these dark evenings, especially when you don't know the dogshit hotspots area, it would be very easy to walk all kinds of crap in someone's house.

Gileswithachainsaw · 04/11/2013 11:45

Someone brought cat shit into mine Angry

valiumredhead · 04/11/2013 11:46

Yabu and daft, in fact I can't believe anyone would be this ridiculous tbh.

lessonsintightropes · 04/11/2013 11:50

OP I don't think YWBU... Although I now realise I am in a tiny minority! We are currently selling our place and buying another (in London) and wouldn't ask viewers to remove shoes and yes would think it was a bit wierd to be asked to take mine off for a viewing. That being said, places we're looking at are on sale with open days and so it's not a constant stream of viewers. Last time we bought a couple of years ago we looked at 70 places and were only asked to take off shoes once. Don't know about the rest of you but I don't make a habit of treading in dogshit! Grin

RichManPoorManBeggarmanThief · 04/11/2013 11:53

I am the opposite. Live in Asia where shoes come off at the door. Was back in the UK viewing houses and I could NOT bring myself to walk around the house in my shoes. The vendor would be "it's fine", and I'd just have to say "sorry, I don't feel comfortable"

It's weird how culturally ingrained it's become in only 5 years. When I was in the Uk I only used to take my shoes off to go to bed :-)

DanglingChillis · 04/11/2013 11:53

I grew up in rural Scotland, this shoes off rule was unheard of when I was growing up (in fact I still can't think of anyone at home that would ask you to take your shoes off) and yet amazingly people manage to have clean carpets! It's almost like we all make sure we have clean shoes before we visit someone and then use that thing at the door, what's it called.... a DOORMAT!!! before entering the house. Do you know, it would actually be considered rude and overfamiliar to walk about someone elses house in your stocking soles?

Insisting on visitors removing their shoes is a bit precious, treating your possessions as more important than you guests, it's the modern equivalent of the plastic covers on the arms of your sofa.

Crowler · 04/11/2013 11:54

Seriously, would you actually pass up a house that you loved because you couldn't wear your shoes in it?

That's your loss.

House viewers do track dirt and mud into houses. That's a fact.

allmycats · 04/11/2013 11:54

If it makes you uncomfortable then don't view, but check before going so
that you don't waste your time, or the vendors.
FWIW I really think that anyone that asks you to take your shoes off in their house is being 'precious'. They CAN get a door mat and ask you to wipe your feet thoroughly.
I do like to keep my house clean, but there is no way I would ASK some
one to take off their shoes, if they offer then OK but if not then they are my guests and I am quite capable of cleaning up after them

Bettercallsaul1 · 04/11/2013 11:55

I think this is an issue that has changed a lot in the last generation - when I was a child, (back in the dark ages) no-one took their shoes off when entering a house - their own, or anyone else's. If people wore slippers inside, this was more for their own comfort than for cleanliness.

However, two things have changed since then. Firstly, standards of health and hygiene have changed (and improved) drastically. It was quite normal twenty years ago to allow dogs to soil on the same areas where children were playing and you risked appearing a bit fussy if you objected. (As I did) Now it is accepted practice to clean up after your dog with refuse bags to protect other people's health.

The other thing which has changed attitudes is the rise of the pale coloured house, with magnolia walls and cream carpets. Previously, carpets were deliberately chosen (often with a pattern, or dark-coloured ) "not to show the dirt" as it was normal practice to wear outdoor shoes inside. Now, with the universal penchant for light colours, we have had to change our customs, or face very regular cleaning bills.

Personally, I hate people coming in with outdoor shoes on - for both hygiene and cleanliness - and find that most people agree - they either offer to take their shoes off or do so very readily when asked. I think , generally, opinion has moved on with this.

Grennie · 04/11/2013 11:55

Crowler - I have never had a problem with house viewers tracking dirt and mud through my house. But I have a doormat.

RichManPoorManBeggarmanThief · 04/11/2013 11:59

It's also a class thing. Taking shoes off in the house is viewed as a bit LMC in the UK.

Grennie · 04/11/2013 12:00

Better - I have been in so many houses with a shoes off policy that don't have clean floors. They have kids running round spilling things on the floor, or cats and dogs shedding hair, or they just don't keep their floors very clean.

I don't care if you take your shoes off or on. My floors are much cleaner than a lot of people with a shoes off policy.

I think it is more to do with the rise of people not wanting to do housework, and so inconveniencing their guests

OneStepCloser · 04/11/2013 12:06

Its manners though isnt it, whether you agree or not, if you enter someones house who prefer shoes off, then its just good manners to do it. If for any reason someone cant or finds it really difficult to take shoes off then obviously again its just good manners to allow them not too.

But to not view a house on that basis is just silly. If someone has a lot of viewers and trying to keep the house clean then I dont think its unreasonable to ask for shoes off.

ChaosTrulyReigns · 04/11/2013 12:06

Where in earth are you lot walking to get such dirty shoes?

As Grennie and others have said - doormats.

If your shies are rank, then you'd Obvs take them off without hesitation., but just normal shoes, no visible mud? Quick shoosh on a mat and go on in.

Flipping heck, I'm astonished that people are thought of as rude fir wanting to keep their shoes on.

DancingLady · 04/11/2013 12:06

YABU and very silly. If it's a rainy day and someone has ten viewings on their house, what do you think their carpets will look like at the end of it?

Suck it up. Or miss out on your dream home - your choice.

Twitterqueen · 04/11/2013 12:06

I absolutely hate being asked to take off my shoes. I'm short, I wear odd socks with holes in them (because I can't be arsed to sort through a million odd socks each day) and my feet always cramp if I don't contain them.

So I'm with you on this one.

though the idea of shoe covers is brilliant - the sellers should offer these I think, rather than insist on bare feet.. Or you take your own.

You could always say you have a very nasty fungal infection... Wink

DancingLady · 04/11/2013 12:07

chaos I have a doormat. My in-laws still manage to track mud through the ground floor whenever they visit. On my cream carpets.

Seriously, is it that much of a hardship to remove your shoes if asked? Is it such an affront to you as a person? I find this very very bizarre.

ChipAndSpud · 04/11/2013 12:08

I read a thread about people taking shoes off or not when going to other peoples houses, I never realised until reading mumsnet that people think it's normal and okay to walk around indoors with your shoes ON!

In my opinion it's incredibly rude not to take your shoes off in the hallway, I always take my shoes off when going into anyone's house, and everyone who comes to my house takes off their shoes without being asked!

Having recently had my house on the market, I'd suggest that you check when booking in a viewing OP if this is a deal breaker for you as there are enough time wasters already!

olgaga · 04/11/2013 12:11

You can buy disposable shoe covers on ebay - they're about 99p for 100! I would never expect to keep my shoes on, especially with autumn mud and rotting leaf litter around.

Most sellers take the trouble to get their house and carpets clean to present it at its best. Who are you to traipse around their home in your outdoor shoes?

MistAllChuckingFrighty · 04/11/2013 12:12

People are assuming that house viewers are considerate people, in general

I would question that. I have had some right ignorant people tramping around my house.

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