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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to refuse to view a house if I have to remove my shoes?

406 replies

iliketea · 04/11/2013 09:01

I'm happy to be told IABU....

We are currently house hunting. A few of the houses we've requested to view have asked us to remove our shoes at the door. At that point, I've said I'm not viewing a house in my socks and stopped the viewin before it's even started if the shoe thing is non-negotiable.

AIBU? it's not that i mind taking my shoes off when I'm visiting a friend - and generally do take my shoes in friends homes, but I find it weird that if you are trying to sell your house that you expect viewers to take their shoes off.

Or am I likely to miss a really great house and just suck it up / make sure i've got non-holey, matching socks wheb we go to view a house?

OP posts:
Gileswithachainsaw · 04/11/2013 12:14

It's not just your house they have been too though. They could have been to three or four houses before yours. You don't know where they have been or the state of the area. I found weed to ffs that must have been trodden in because it wasn't from my house. So drugs and cat shit both brought in on An EA or his clients shoes!!!

Bettercallsaul1 · 04/11/2013 12:19

Grennie - obviously, there's no universal rule. Lots of people without the "shoes-off" rule will still have clean houses and people who insist on shoes off may not have immaculate homes but you are still more likely, in my opinion, to keep your floors clean if you take your shoes off.

I have a lot of visitors and can see how attitudes have changed on this - people, especially the younger generation, just expect different rules in the house and, given that they are obviously in agreement, I don't feel that I am at all imposing on them.

Grennie · 04/11/2013 12:22

Yes it is younger people who insist more on this. And I do think it is also linked to the erosion of the idea of treating guests well. There seems to have been a growth in the idea of, my house, my rules.

Bettercallsaul1 · 04/11/2013 12:27

But the thing is, they are usually the visitors' "rules" as well, so they no longer seem like rules! Just mutual accepted practice.

Gileswithachainsaw · 04/11/2013 12:29

Oh come on. Asking people to remove shoes is not treating guests poorly. Ffs get a grip.

Grennie · 04/11/2013 12:30

Maybe amongst young people. Not older people.

And maybe when you get older and understand how taking shoes on and off is difficult for many older people who can walk fine, you will understand this more.

Gileswithachainsaw · 04/11/2013 12:30

Unless of course you say "get those bloody shoes off now you arses"

lessonsintightropes · 04/11/2013 12:30

Chip I would find it very odd and over familiar if someone removed their shoes on coming into my house...

Bettercallsaul1 · 04/11/2013 12:55

If people have genuine difficulty taking shoes off, I wouldn't insist! Taking off your shoes when going into each others' houses is an act of mutual thoughtfulness and consideration, but health issues obviously trump that.

Beastofburden · 04/11/2013 12:56

we have wooden floors and I wash them Grin

agree when I was a child it would have been considered beyond weird to ask someone to take their shoes off.

Grennie · 04/11/2013 12:57

What would you judge as genuine?

Bettercallsaul1 · 04/11/2013 13:05

Genuine reasons would be difficulty or pain in bending down to remove shoes. ( not just the fact that the people involved weren't used to doing it or didn't do it in their own houses.)

Crowler · 04/11/2013 13:05

I would not ask a guest to take their shoes off either, but I would mightily appreciate it if my estate agent had a policy of asking people to take their shoes off before viewing houses.

ChippingInLovesAGoodBang · 04/11/2013 13:05

It seems very odd to me to feel 'exposed' to the point of discomfort simply removing your shoes, but if you choose to prioritise that feeling over finding the right house that's entirely up to you. Though as many others have said, please make it well known to the agents before you set up viewings as it's not fair on anyone to waste their time nor get the sellers hopes up.

dandelionsRflowers · 04/11/2013 13:14

Kirsty and Phil often take their shoes off on Location x3.

JassyRadlett · 04/11/2013 13:14

Christ, a lot of people on this thread need to invest in a decent pair of doormats.

When we were viewing (and we viewed a lot), the only places we were asked to remove our shoes were the places with the worst carpets. Horrid to walk on even in socks. Ugh.

I would never dream of asking people to take their shoes off on my house, because to me my job as host is to make people feel comfortable. I take my shoes off most places I visit, and a lot of people take theirs off when they come to mine, or ask if I'd like them to. But I'd never dream of asking, or insisting that strangers viewing my house do so. It's fucking rude.

ButThereAgain · 04/11/2013 13:23

I think the OP is doing the vendors a favour by signalling from the outset that she is an awkward customer. What a relief not to have to deal any further with someone so hostile to a bit of give-and-take!

I certainly wouldn't ask viewers to take their shoes off (unless I was doing it as a selling technique to enhance their perception of the immaculateness and preciousness of my hovel house); but if someone asked me to take my shoes off I wouldn't bat an eyelid at it.

Huitre · 04/11/2013 13:38

The link to the shoe protectors has made me howl with laughter. I have never in my life met someone who would actually hand out shoe protectors at the door! That is really quite, er, bonkers fastidious.

Bettercallsaul1 · 04/11/2013 13:39

If this really is such a big issue when viewing houses, it probably should be flagged up in the printed viewing details buyers get before visiting. Just a sentence saying "Please note that visitors are asked to remove shoes before viewing the property" would warn people of the vendor's expectations. Prospective visitors could then comply or give that property a miss if they felt strongly about it.

My own guess is that most people wouldn't blink an eyelid at it and that it might well soon come to be included as standard in most printed details.

valiumredhead · 04/11/2013 13:40

Perhaps vendors should provide those little shower caps for feet?Grin

Grennie · 04/11/2013 13:44

Why not just hand these out at the door. Problem solved.

www.kcprofessional.com/products/scientific-ppe/protective/sterile/12914-kimtech-pure-a5-sterile-cleanroom-coverall

Quoteunquote · 04/11/2013 13:44

Just get disposible shoe covers, we use them all the time for viewing, or when we have trades in finished properties.

JassyRadlett · 04/11/2013 13:45

Thinking about it - I'd actually be a little wary of buying from vendors who insisted people remove shoes before viewing. Have dealt with a few vendors over the years who are slightly deluded about how precious/well decorated/amazing their house is and take huge exception to observations such as 'yes, it's lovely except for the torn carpet/dislodged picture rail/blank plaster around the light switches'. Awful to negotiate with and unrealistic throughout the process. Insisting on removal of shoes - rather than responding politely to an offer to do so - would make me feel nervous about who I was dealing with.

So maybe OP and these vendors are doing each other a favour?

morethanpotatoprints · 04/11/2013 13:46

Yes YABU.

Firstly, if everybody went in with shoes on, the carpets/flooring would be very dirty. Maybe the vendors had them cleaned in order to sell the house.
You are a bit dim as well, as the refusals you make may mean you miss a house you really want.

bundaberg · 04/11/2013 13:46

YABU

if i was selling my house I wouldn't want a constant trail of viewers coming in and traipsing round in their shoes.