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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to refuse to view a house if I have to remove my shoes?

406 replies

iliketea · 04/11/2013 09:01

I'm happy to be told IABU....

We are currently house hunting. A few of the houses we've requested to view have asked us to remove our shoes at the door. At that point, I've said I'm not viewing a house in my socks and stopped the viewin before it's even started if the shoe thing is non-negotiable.

AIBU? it's not that i mind taking my shoes off when I'm visiting a friend - and generally do take my shoes in friends homes, but I find it weird that if you are trying to sell your house that you expect viewers to take their shoes off.

Or am I likely to miss a really great house and just suck it up / make sure i've got non-holey, matching socks wheb we go to view a house?

OP posts:
DameMarjorieChardem · 04/11/2013 11:02

I'm with you OP, I hate taking my shoes off in people's houses! You would think they would be more interested in the buyers comfort!

Gileswithachainsaw · 04/11/2013 11:04

POTENTIAL buyers!

Why should they come above keeping your home clean and not wanting dirt or worse trodden into carpets for their kids to ingest and become ill.

Or are you offering to go scrub mud out of the nursery carpets?

mitchsta · 04/11/2013 11:05

YABU. If I was a seller with loads of viewings - and let's be honest, I could be showing prospective buyers round my home every week for YEARS - I'd hate to have to repeatedly clean up the crap that people have walked through the house.

My guess is that those who don't ask viewers to remove their shoes are new to the market - and they'll change their tune once they realise their efforts to present a clean and tidy home are being ruined by prospective buyers.

Maybe even OP will be asking prospective buyers of her home to take off their shoes after cleaning her own carpets/floors for the umpteenth time?! Or perhaps she won't care that it's getting grubbier and grubbier over time as she's moving out anyway?

In response to the disability point, I would absolutely be willing to make an exception for those who weren't able to take off their shoes easily - but it would be an exception, not a rule, so it would involve making me aware of the situation, which I appreciate some people wouldn't want to do. In which case, best of luck finding your dream home elsewhere.

Gileswithachainsaw · 04/11/2013 11:06

And with regard to the disabilities I'll throw in imuno compromised children! Would you take your shoes off then or god forbid tie hair back or wash hands or would that be too much to ask too?

Grennie · 04/11/2013 11:08

Part of welcoming visitors to your home, is making them feel at home. I have over the years a couple of anxious people visit who wanted to keep their coats on, so of course they could. People like my mother who has arthritis and finds putting on and taking off her shoes extraordinarily difficult, and a friend who has problems which means taking her shoes off make her feet very painful.

If you come into my house, unless your shoes are muddy, I don't care what you wear or whether you take your shoes off or on. Do whatever makes you comfortable. Floors, including carpets, are there to be walked on. I buy very good quality carpets because I know that any dirt is easily cleaned off.

And my floors are way cleaner than many friends who insist on shoes off

eurochick · 04/11/2013 11:09

I'm kind of amused by the notion that keeping shoes on will mean crap is walked into the house. We have a doormat. And cream living room carpet. It doesn't get dirty. I guess if you have a mud path to the front door and no doormat it's possible, but otherwise...

Gileswithachainsaw · 04/11/2013 11:10

But they aren't visitors. They are strangers who will be there for five mins. Enough time to make a mess but not enough time to even remember who the hell you are or what you look like. Most normal people base a decision on area and the house itself. Not if they got a tea or coffee or keep their shoes on.

pianodoodle · 04/11/2013 11:12

YABU

To me it would be a good sign that the previous owners take care of the place.

HexU · 04/11/2013 11:14

But they aren't visitors

I was going to say that as well. They are potentially buying the house - it's location/layout/bedrooms - yes decor does influence unduly but if they are buying the house most likely the flooring going to stay so looking after it's got to be a good thing surely.

Leopoldina · 04/11/2013 11:14

If you're looking somewhere where competition is hot (central London), yes, yo'll miss out because an estate agent won't want to deal with your quirks and won't bother calling you when something comes on. He'll have five other people in your position ahead of you who aren't precious about shoes. They'll earn their commission more easily elsewhere.

Grennie · 04/11/2013 11:16

Yes, we have a doormat too. Most people use it.

MistAllChuckingFrighty · 04/11/2013 11:16

People looking to buy your home are not visitors

This is a business transaction, surely ? I don't want to make friends with vendors, I want to see the house. I don't need to be made to feel "welcome", I just need to see the goods on offer.

Grennie · 04/11/2013 11:19

If people are made to feel welcome, they are more likely to buy a house at a good price.

SnoogyWoo · 04/11/2013 11:20

Just turn it on its head.

Would you rather buy a house where the owners looked after it and cared about it or one where they couldn't care less.

If you do take your shoes off, respect what they want and it turns out to be your dream house then it will make negotiations much smoother.

MistAllChuckingFrighty · 04/11/2013 11:22

The house we bought was not the one where the vendors made the most effort. We bought the house not the social experience of the viewings.

Grennie · 04/11/2013 11:23

I do look after my house. I also don't care if you wear shoes in my house.

From observation alone, it is not true that those who want shoes off look after their house better. In fact I think it is more related to age than anything to do with being more house proud.

clubnail · 04/11/2013 11:24

YABU! Dog poo. That is all.

harticus · 04/11/2013 11:25

I renovate houses as a job.
I lay down carpet off-cut trails or mats in newly decorated properties.
I expect potential buyers to keep to the protected areas - and most do. There is always the occasional thoughtless dickhead though ....

As for taking shoes off to view a property? Nah.
My parents are currently househunting.
My father has had a double hip replacement and finds getting shoes on and off very difficult.
I think they might turn tail and leave if that was expected of them.

TeamSouthfields · 04/11/2013 11:26

Its still there house... Would you like mud, dirt and anything else on ur carpet???

They might not sell there house for months
They may have children crawling around

I remove my shoes as soon as i go into mine and someone else's house and think its very rude not to!!!

Who wants dirt/crap on there carpets

Uabvu

samandi · 04/11/2013 11:28

Hm, well I probably wouldn't request it of people but I certainly wouldn't have a problem complying either. I have sympathy if they have lots of viewings and want to keep the place spotless for each one, but it's a fairly unusual request in my experience. Surely you'd want to do everything to make the potential buyer comfortable, not put them off.

sebsmummy1 · 04/11/2013 11:29

I'm sorry but you are being revolting.

I am about to have the house we have just bought refitted with annoyingly expensive carpets because the carpets that come with the house are filthy. If you were a guest at my house I would ask you to remove your shoes, especially if the ground outside was wet and I would think you were extremely unreasonable to refuse.

In certain cultures it is considered a sign of respect. Plus you could have trodden in dog shit for all I know. Get over yourself.

Gileswithachainsaw · 04/11/2013 11:29

And if it's all about providing comfort then where do you draw the line?

Walking about with a fag, or dropping crumbs from their burger everywhere?

Farting burping, dropping wrappers on the floor?

Neither is good manners in someone else's home regardless of how well you know them or don't know them.

harticus · 04/11/2013 11:34

Where is this horrible mythical place where people walk around caked in dog shit? Grin

fieldfare · 04/11/2013 11:38

Yabu.

flipchart · 04/11/2013 11:38

harticus Mumsnet of course!