To think that commenting on DS's small stature is NOT on?

[Azrael]

We live in a building block and meet our neighbours regularly for dinners etc. They're nice, friendly, good cooks. DS is 19 months old and small (2nd percentile) but meets all his milestones perfectly (walking, talking, ...). I breastfed him for 8 months, he eats loads, his milk allergy is resolving. Neighours' DS is 14 months old and exactly the same height as our DS.

It took me hours of research and reading threads on mumsnet to understand that DS's current small stature is fine. He is growing slowly now but he will grow faster later. Maybe when he's 5 or 8 or 15 he'll have a growth spurt and will be a normal height (DP and I are both exactly the average height for a British male and female I found out!). I have stopped thinking that there is an issue with my child's height.

YET when my neighbour said the other day 'oh how cute both our kids are wearing the same cardigan, I think ours is actually even the same size because...' and there she let her voice trail and was on her way to the lift.

I don't think she meant to hurt me but she just couldn't help rubbing my nose in the, yes, currently oddly small stature of DS.

AIBU for thinking she totally lacks emotional intelligence and empathy?

I certainly wouldn't tell a parent of a child with say bad eczema on the face 'oh our son is wearing the same tshirt as yours but the colours suit him better because...'.

DD2 was small, bumping along the 0.4 centile until she was about 6 or so - now at 8 I think she's up to the 9th and doesn't look particularly small.

I'm getting on a bit and hadn't heard of "percentile". So going to google what it means now.

To be honest a 19 and 14 month old being the same size is hardly shocking. My 10 year old nephew is the same size if not a bit smaller than my 6 yr old DS. I think you need to chill out what your friend said was hardly insulting.

My ds3 is small- he wasn't at birth, but slowly dropped off the charts in his first year or so. He sits below the bottom line on the chart in his red book, for both height and weight.

People have commented on it, but I agree with them- he's smaller than other children his age, it's a fact, it's how he is. His little brother (20mths) wears some of the same size clothes he did at 4 years old. He wears stuff out rather than outgrowing it, he's good value for money with clothes and shoes. He also can't have milk. His siblings are all around average height, dh and I are suppose are a little above average- dh is over 6ft. So I think we notice it more, comparing them.

He's one of the oldest in his year 2 class but he told me proudly that he's bigger than some of the children in the nursery class (3-4yr olds).

He says he's big on the inside .

heidihole
www.patient.co.uk/doctor/centile-charts-and-assessing-growth

Glad the thread's been helpful OP!

My DS started on the 2nd and now at 2.5yo he's around the 9th centile. At his 2 year check, we had a lovely trainee HV who measured his height and weight and just said "Lovely, that makes him in perfect proportion". :)

He has a small build as well as being on the shorter side, so is usually wearing clothes 6-12 months meant for children younger than he is, the tshirts he wore this summer were 9-12m, and the winter coat I've just got him is 18-24.
Most of his friends are well above the 70th centile, so he looks like he's surrounded by giants! This works very well in his favour when it comes to passing clothes/welly boots down...

As with most women's clothing, the size labels in children's clothes are irrelevant, you just wear what fits well (for me, that means I have well fitting size 10, 12, 14, and 16s!).
Daft but there you go and it makes online shopping a bit of a lottery.
Expensive clothes tend to be sized smaller (Petit Bateau etc), cheaper/supermarket clothes and American brands tend to come up big.

Argh, sorry, that was really garbled...

Obv meant his heat and weight were both 9th centile, hence 'perfectly in proportion'.
And
Generally wears clothes meant for children at least 6-12 months younger than him, not that he wears size 6-12!

Off to bed!

14 and 19 months wearing the same size isn't much difference. 14 months is in 12-18 months clothes, round the middle of them. 19 months would be just out 12-18 clothes-assuming they're both average.

Dd1 was almost exactly the same height as a friend of hers from when she was a year old until she was about 11. The friend is 2 school years ahead, and about 16 months older.
Ds (age 6yo, and average height) is very similar height to a friend who is nearly 1.6 years younger (and doesn't stand out as especially tall).