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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that if you're going to break wind, do it in private?

136 replies

ICameOnTheJitney · 18/10/2013 23:09

I know you're going to say AIBU...some of you will act outraged that I don't think it's "normal" to fart in front of your oh. But think it's disgusting.

Dh's STINK and I have lost count of the times I have asked him to do it in another room...he never frigging does.

I'm in the dining room on the comp. he's in the sitting room watchingrtv...he came in, made a drink, farted and left! I told him off
WHY????? DOES HE DO THIS???

It's ranker than rank! I think people should do it in the toilet because it's related to shitting...in fact it is the brother of shitting....a fart is the SOUL of a shit expired prior to the actual shit....and they all belong in the TOILET AIBU???

OP posts:
Monty27 · 18/10/2013 23:49

I recommend taking medication to stop the 'wind' or change your diet. Clearly something doesn't agree with your digestion system. Or if it does, go.to.the.bathroom.

And by the way, are you not yet a teenager?

IDoAllMyOwnStunts · 18/10/2013 23:53

YABU - sometimes farts are the only form of communication in this house Grin

UnicornsNotRiddenByGrownUps · 18/10/2013 23:53

ArwenStardust what is your Shock face at. If it's the 15 times a day thing I could outstrip that by a mile.

justmuddlingalong · 18/10/2013 23:54

It's a sad arse that never rejoices!

Original poster
ICameOnTheJitney · 18/10/2013 23:55

Crunchy DH is not a woman and he has not suffered a birth injury. If he had, I would of course forgive him but silently hit him on the head with his own arsehole every time he did it.

OP posts:
fortyplus · 18/10/2013 23:55

AlexReidsLonelyBraincell Jeremy is a bit posh, innit?

Original poster
ICameOnTheJitney · 18/10/2013 23:56

Just a fart is not the arse's method of rejoicing! It's just a sad, lonely wind to denote the soon to be passed.

OP posts:
YouTheCat · 19/10/2013 00:01

Well my arse is rejoicing. sticks out tongue and runs away

DropYourSword · 19/10/2013 00:02

Hehe, they are our rules too Unicorn!!

BreconBeBuggered · 19/10/2013 00:10

If I got up off the sofa to release the fart into the toilet, the blighter would escape through the tiniest gap in the exit whilst I was struggling to my feet, and thus be free to wander into others' nasal cavities at will. Much better to let it bury itself under the cushions.

Monty27 · 19/10/2013 00:17

How old are you lot? It's not socially acceptable. Get manners.

randomAXEofkindness · 19/10/2013 00:21

This thread is so friggin' funny. Nice one OP Grin

YouTheCat · 19/10/2013 00:21

Too old to be able hold them in. Grin

justmuddlingalong · 19/10/2013 00:23

I'm 43 and would like to suggest a new tv show called 'My arse has got talent'.

YouTheCat · 19/10/2013 00:24

I'm in. I'm 44. Grin

DaleyBump · 19/10/2013 00:27

I would tell you to fuck off to be fair, I'll fart in my own home if I want and it's not for anyone else to dictate what I should and shouldn't do in my own home.

Original poster
ICameOnTheJitney · 19/10/2013 00:29

Daley it is if you bloody SHARE the home! Or would you just do a dump on the floor if you fancied it because it's "your home" Hmm

OP posts:
SweetSeraphim · 19/10/2013 00:31

I agree with you OP. I think it's horribly bad manners when people fart with impunity. I detest the way that some couples think it's acceptable to try and out-fart each other.

We all let out an accidental one occasionally - but constantly farting in company is rude.

DaleyBump · 19/10/2013 00:33

That's different. If you fart, you don't have to spend time and effort cleaning someone else's shit up. That's a bit of a silly comparison Hmm

SweetSeraphim · 19/10/2013 00:33

I talk about this with the girls at work sometimes, they're all in their twenties and think I'm mental.

I'm all for intimacy, but ugh.

justmuddlingalong · 19/10/2013 00:35

OP, if a fart is the soul of a shit, is a burp the soul of vomit, and do you go to the bathroom to burp?

GobbySadcase · 19/10/2013 00:35

I utterly defend my liking for 'fart offs' with the old man, especially as I have ibs and win every time.

Each to their own.

Monty27 · 19/10/2013 00:36

OP yanbu, farts are for toilets/private space. They are disgusting.
LTB

GobbySadcase · 19/10/2013 00:36

(Mind you shartage is on the increase).

Original poster
ICameOnTheJitney · 19/10/2013 00:39

Just yes it is. I don't burp loudly...I sort of strangle them before they get out. Daley to me, smelling the fart is as bad as cleaning shite up. SO there.

OP posts: