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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be slightly freaked out by this 'new friend'?

94 replies

Sticklebug · 11/10/2013 20:08

My DD has recently started secondary school and today went round to a new friends house for the first time. I arrived to collect her at 6.30pm as agreed and the mum invited me in. She offered me a cup of tea and said ' it is always lovely to make new friends'. We had a nice chat, although she was a bit intense and asked loads of questions about DD's after school activities and we seemed to get on well.

All good....

Then, another mum arrived to collect her son (younger bro of DD's friend) and I was introduced as 'this is sticklebug, my new friend'. Cue me looking slightly uncomfortable and cheesy smiling (my stock response for awkward conversations).

Other mum sits down and DD friends mum then sits and tells this new mum how much she likes me and how we are going to be such 'close friends'....all this time i am sat at the table feeling really quite awkward.

Just got home and had text asking if I am free this weekend anytime for some 'girly shopping time in town'!

She was nice, but I am now slightly freaked out. AIBU?

OP posts:
AllDirections · 11/10/2013 20:21

She must be very lonely - or struggles with social skills maybe?

Or just being friendly maybe Hmm

YouTheCat · 11/10/2013 20:22

Too friendly.

StickEmUp · 11/10/2013 20:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sparklingbrook · 11/10/2013 20:22

Perhaps she was showing off to her other friend? trying to make her jealous? Shock

Sparklingbrook · 11/10/2013 20:24

Or, perhaps she thought if your DDs are going to be friends she would like to get to know you a bit better? please let it be that.

EugenesAxe · 11/10/2013 20:25

It would slightly alarm me TBH. But I wouldn't cut her out entirely because I'm too much of an invertebrate 'nice'. I'd probably fob off the girly shopping (I fucking hate shopping with ANYONE anyway) then invite her out for a drink with others, so I could properly scope her out.

BoffinMum · 11/10/2013 20:26

I have learned in life that friendships which start like this always end in tears.

Run.For.The.Hills.

everlong · 11/10/2013 20:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

YouTheCat · 11/10/2013 20:28

I'm not much of a shopper either, except with dp and dd.

If you think you'd want to be friends, suggest a coffee at some point in the future. A quick coffee.

Original poster
Sticklebug · 11/10/2013 20:28

Sorry, for clarification:

'New friend's mum' is mum of DD's new friend (who incidently is lovely).

Whilst having a cuppa with NFM another mum arrived to collect her DS, who was playing with DD's new friends little brother.

Secondary school catchment means that this little bro at a different school to my DS (who is same age and also prompted a 'our DS's will also be friends comment') so I do not know the other mum.

New friends mum was actually really nice, it was all just a bit full on for me. Have replied to text (thanks for advise) saying that I am busy this weekend, but maybe DD's friend could come here after school next Friday and we could catch up then...

OP posts:
Sparklingbrook · 11/10/2013 20:29

I think I have looked at it from all angles ever, but it's not happening is it? Grin

Original poster
Sticklebug · 11/10/2013 20:31

Sorry, meant advice...

OP posts:
DurhamDurham · 11/10/2013 20:31

I be the next time you see her she has your hairstyle and is dressing in your style of clothes Grin

hiddenhome · 11/10/2013 20:33

Single
White
Female Wink

Original poster
Sticklebug · 11/10/2013 20:33

I have no hairstyle or style in clothes, so would be interesting Smile

OP posts:
MrsSchadenfreude · 11/10/2013 20:34

Oh. I would have gone. Blush

hiddenhome · 11/10/2013 20:35

Sticklebug I resemble a bag 'o' shite, but I've had a few Klingon fwends and it's traumatic, trust me Grin

Sparklingbrook · 11/10/2013 20:38

She would have taken you for a makeover Stickle. Shock

Original poster
Sticklebug · 11/10/2013 20:39

I also completely hate shopping (hence the no style comment).

The thing that is bothering me a bit was that she was nice and i do feel that we connected and could be friends....so maybe she is just more direct than me?

However, I already neglect existing friends due to madly hectic life and no time, so .....

OP posts:
PeppiNephrine · 11/10/2013 20:39

Someone says they like you and want to be friends, and you have conniption and all the advice here is about what is wrong with them and how to get rid of them?

It's official, I live on another planet from the majority of posters. Why do you all have to be so mean?

purrpurr · 11/10/2013 20:40

Aww, buncha meanies. Sounds like a case for captain awkward.

DownstairsMixUp · 11/10/2013 20:41

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

DurhamDurham · 11/10/2013 20:41

Go shopping together, get your hair done, buy some clothes you both like. Go on ask her, she's probably hiding in your closet as we speak just waiting to be asked......

Original poster
Sticklebug · 11/10/2013 20:42

Peppi, I am feeling mean at saying no to the shopping, but that is genuinely my most hated thing in the world.

She has says yes to DD coming here after school on friday and she will come at 6 to collect her and have a cuppa.

Think maybe she is just more honest than most. If i like someone I would never come out with ' I like you, can we be friends?', but maybe that is the way to do it?

OP posts:
Feminine · 11/10/2013 20:45

Is she from here (UK)?

From my experience, women from some other places are so much more full on and friendly. In a good way.

I think you did a sensible thing, it can't hurt to catch your breath in a new relationship. When you see her next week, she may have calmed down a bit!

I'd be interested to hear how things develop.