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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To tell the nursery staff not to use a nickname

89 replies

MoonsMamma · 07/10/2013 19:02

DD (22mo) is Lucy. She has recently started to refer to herself as "Lucy-Lou" when asking for things.
This irks me. I know it is an innocent nickname / affectionate term, but DH and I never use this at home. Today when we picked her up, another child said "bye bye Lucy-Lou-Lou"

Do we let it ride and keep correcting her at home or do we tell the nursery staff to use her proper name?

OP posts:

MortifiedAdams · 07/10/2013 19:04

It would be totally PFB of you to ask them to stop. In fact, the NN may not have even come from the staff.

Nicknames are an inevetable part of most peooles names.

Just use the name you like at home and let others use nns.

usualsuspect · 07/10/2013 19:05

Let it go, it's just an affectionate name.

I think it's nice.

YourMaNoBraBackOfMyCar · 07/10/2013 19:08

My dd is Lucy-goosey or wait for it ...Kris Akabusi. Couldn't care less tbh. Its affectionate.

TidyDancer · 07/10/2013 19:08

Correcting her? I wouldn't even do that. Just refer to her as Lucy when you talk to her and let her refer to herself as she wants. And I think it's lovely that nursery have a sweet little nickname for her.

Just count yourself lucky that you don't have my DD name problems. She has chosen to be both Sardine and Rocky in her time. Odd kid.

MummyofIsla · 07/10/2013 19:09

I think its utterly adorable. My little girl is called Isla and though we don;t use it she gets called Lala at nursery (stemmed from another child not being able to pronounce her name properly) bu I figure its just a faze.

CailinDana · 07/10/2013 19:09

would you be ok with your mother telling your friends what to call you?

FerrisBueller1972 · 07/10/2013 19:10

I got silent rage at nursery when they added an 'i' sound onto the end of my sons 3 letter name. One of the reasons he was given the name was so it wouldn't be shortened. Didn't think it would be friggin lengthened

TattyDevine · 07/10/2013 19:10

Better than poopy poo?

MummyofIsla · 07/10/2013 19:10

oh god 'phase'!

AhCmonSeriouslyNow · 07/10/2013 19:10

YABU , definitely.

AmberDextrous · 07/10/2013 19:11

It's sweet & lovely

TattyDevine · 07/10/2013 19:12

When she's a teen she might be Juicey Loosey like my friend was ;)

samithesausage · 07/10/2013 19:12

My son's called jimmy, and he's called mr jimmy piggle, piggle and diddy. Isn't lucy lu a film star as well? :)

BrokenSunglasses · 07/10/2013 19:12

Let it go.

You trust these people to look after and care for your daughter all day, they are allowed to build their own personal relationship with her that isn't dictated by you.

They are just being affectionate, and presumably you want the people who are looking after your small child to feel affection for her. There's probably lots of things that happen at nursery that you and your DH don't do at home.

I think it's quite sad that you feel irked by it. You should be pleased your dd is building positive relationships with the people you allow her to spend her day with.

MoveYourArmsLikeHenry · 07/10/2013 19:13

When my niece Chloe was a baby nursery staff gave her the adorable nickname of Chlo Bo. I thought it was cute and my sister thought it was lovely that the staff were so affectionate.. She is 5 now and to this day we still call her Chlo Bo.

Floggingmolly · 07/10/2013 19:13

You say she calls herself this? It's not necessarily in response to nursery; they may just be using her name for herself. It's a non issue.

CoffeeTea103 · 07/10/2013 19:13

It's cute let it go. There are real things to get irked up about, this isn't one of them.

giraffesCantGoGuising · 07/10/2013 19:14

YANBU how dare they use a name of affection for your child. They should call her by her surname only. Or better still "child x". They have no business being attached and caring towards her, utterly evil nursery staff. I bet they even cuddle her sometimes too.

OldRoan · 07/10/2013 19:14

I was seriously puzzled when one of my Y2 children was telling me all about her weekend with Mimi and how she came to school with Mimi.

Mimi is, in fact, a girl in my class with a much more sombre first name. She probably goes home and tells her mum all about being called Mimi but it has never crossed my lips, I promise.

Just leave it - when she is older she will have her own opinions about nicknames!

CailinDana · 07/10/2013 19:14

My two sisters and I all had very odd nicknames when we were little and we still use them for each other now and again. I love when my younger sister uses my nn - makes me feel very nostalgic.

Sirzy · 07/10/2013 19:14

I agree with others, not doing any harm and it won't be the last time that someone gives her a nickname.

Iwaswatchingthat · 07/10/2013 19:15

I LOVE your daughter's name btw.

Language and rhyme play is part of language development and phonetic awareness.

Within an early years setting it is pretty usual to play around with children's names and encourage them to do the same in order to check their understanding of rhyme, which links to hearing sounds in words. E.g. Lucy, goosy, roosy You might find she comes home with more stuff like this too as well as her nn.

My daughter has always been called a nn that I never use by a particular TA. I think it is lovely that they have a bond and it is a nice term of affection.

It shows me that they are fond of her and I think that is lovely. I think Lucy Lou is really sweet tbh.

CeliaFate · 07/10/2013 19:15

Let it go. It's an affectionate nickname. If you asked them to stop it, I think it would definitely colour their view of you. I've always done this* for my dc and if others did it I think I'd be pleased that they thought of my dc so affectionately.

*it didn't work when a colleague called a 5 yo child "Katie Clogs" to be told "FUCK OFF."

ShatnersBassoon · 07/10/2013 19:15

It's playful and friendly. It doesn't mean she will forget her real name or expect everyone to call her Lucy-Lou.

QueenofKelsingra · 07/10/2013 19:22

it isn't that straightforward to me. My son has made up his own shortening of his name, stemming from when he was learning to talk and couldn't say his full name (4 syllable). he refers to himself by this nickname and my parents use it, as do a few close friends of mine(which I am fine with). however I wouldn't want his pre-school to refer to him this way. he is 3.8yrs and will introduce himself with the shortening but I always have to repeat his full name after as the shortening isn't a known name, its made up (think Beatrice being known as bee-bee).

if I heard the pre-school staff referring to him by the shortening I would probably say 'I know he uses that nickname for himself and that's fine but I would appreciate if he could be called by his full name by the staff'.

once he's old enough to assert his opinion on it (and likely choose a more accepted nn!) then that is a different matter and I will respect his choice. at the moment he responds to both his full and nickname and likes his full name (just cant be bothered to say the whole thing) so I will continue to use his full name as much as possible.

sorry, that ended up lengthy but my point is I understand your feeling on the matter, she is too young IMO to truly know if she wants to use this nn and I think it important they stay aware of their full name so they have options as they get older - not lumbered with a silly/cutesy nn from their toddler years as its all they hear.

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