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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have a second glass of wine (pregnant)

90 replies

FlightMode · 05/10/2013 22:29

I'm not a big drinker, half a glass a week is the most I've had in pregnancy (not much more when not pregnant) -am 25 wks

But DH brought home a really, really nice bottle of red tonight and I had one small glass with dinner - it was lovely. I've just poured myself another. Doubt I'll finish it, but is it terrible to even start it?

OP posts:
FatPenguin · 05/10/2013 23:01

It's your baby and your choice. Personally I won't eat or drink anything that could potentially harm my baby.

Cuddlydragon · 05/10/2013 23:02

Your body, your choice, but the truth is you can't know what effect even one glass will have so why take the chance just to have a drink?

CloverkissSparklecheeks · 05/10/2013 23:03

Just seems odd considering you have now worried about drinking it. I am guessing it was not his intention then, presumably he just bought it for himself?

CHJR · 05/10/2013 23:04

No guys - reread my post, please. I'm not blaming OP, i promise (i'm even not blaming myself). i'm just saying, if you're not sure with the glass in front of you how will you feel later... But maybe I misread a lighthearted post and I apologize. To some things I do overreact - that was my point: watch out for YOUR OWN future overreactions Sad

Moxiegirl · 05/10/2013 23:05

Bet this thread spoiled your enjoyment of it!

CHJR · 05/10/2013 23:09

Yes i guess I did that. Sorry. But do remember I said - coincidence. Guilty imaginings are even more easy to swallow than wine.

Original poster
FlightMode · 05/10/2013 23:11

Clover he brought it home for us, knowing I'd enjoy a few sips with dinner

It's the second glass I was iffy about

CHJR don't worry, I understood your first post :)

OP posts:
hettienne · 05/10/2013 23:19

I limit myself to 2.2 units, once a week. Though in the 3rd trimester last time I probably had a bit more on occasions.

I'm sure I've read a study that said no harmful effects were found in babies whose mothers drank less than 8 units a week. And didn't one study find babies whose mothers abstained completely had lower IQs?

Truth is, no one knows how much causes damage, but if 2 glasses of wine on occasion caused problems a whole load more of us would have FAS.

hettienne · 05/10/2013 23:21

FatPenguin - I hope you avoid toiletries, cleaning products and make up with any chemicals in them too then!

CloverkissSparklecheeks · 05/10/2013 23:22

Ok, fair enough. Only you know what you are comfortable with drinking and MN is likely to give you extreme answers anyway.

quesadilla · 05/10/2013 23:26

Drink it. As a one off against a background of low to moderate drinking the chances if it doing you any harm are infinitesimally small.

Someone has just written a book about this btw: they basically found that most of the data on which this current alcohol guilt in pregnancy is based is unreliable. It's unwise to drink heavily on pregnancy but modest drinker having a second glass is not heavy drinking.

ladyofdemanor · 05/10/2013 23:27

I had the glass of wine a week this did not impact on the genetic condition I unknowingly passed on to my child. I think a lot of people always have an opinion. Drink if you feel comfortable - if you don't quite simply don't.

footballagain · 05/10/2013 23:41

I'm not judging. I'm just surprised you are asking, since it seemed you were happy with it anyway.

When did a small glass of wine warrant such a soul searching mission on the internet?

Oh shit, I'll get flamed for this so don't worry about my opinion (even though you invited it).

FatPenguin · 05/10/2013 23:49

Hettienne- I don't think using make up compares to drinking a couple of units of alcohol every week.

hettienne · 05/10/2013 23:54

The Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists advise pregnant women avoid moisturisers, cosmetics and toiletries due to the "potential but unproven risk". The risk of a glass of wine a week is potential but unproven too. Why take any risk with your baby though?

FatPenguin · 06/10/2013 00:05

Ok well fingers crossed my baby doesn't come out with Fetal Moisturiser Syndrome then.
OP asked for peoples opinion, I gave mine. I didn't criticise, just said that I wouldn't drink alcohol but it's her baby and up to her.

roadwalker · 06/10/2013 00:08

No-one knows how much FAE there are because it wouldnt be diagnosed, it would just give your child a, hopefully, small disadvantage
Like other conditions it is a spectrum

Lj8893 · 06/10/2013 00:19

I personally haven't drank any alcohol in my pregnancy (except an accidental sip of vodka and coke which was a big shock to my taste buds!)

I don't think it will do any harm though, but I do wonder why you would take the risk of drinking any amount of alcohol espessially since you weren't a big drinker pre-pregnancy?

Boobybeau · 06/10/2013 00:23

CHJR I got what you were trying to say and I feel the same as you. When my DS was born very poorly I wracked my brain for anything I may have done to cause his problems and I'm alway so thankful that I never drank, smoked etc during pregnancy so I know I wasn't to blame. Is it really worth the 'what ifs'
Not a dig at anyone who does drink etc... I'm just saying

CHJR · 06/10/2013 01:18

Let's face it - though i do struggle to do so when feeling low - the two glasses i had on my birthday during ds2's incubation, like those in ds1's (and ds1 is undeniably smarter than I) were probably no more important than the mascara, the hair dye, the flu shots (2 coz it was my first year getting them and the OB prescribed them coz I'd had pneumonia the previous 2 years), the shingles weeks 24-36, the IVF and its attendant drugs and extra scans, the underlying conditions unknown that led to the IVF, and let's not forget some studies suggest that stress in pg is very bad for the baby - whoops, I think I lost track of my thought - and my life though I do think my life would work better if it fit better into a normal MN thread...

CHJR · 06/10/2013 01:22

See, I even have to justify the flu shots - well it probably was them - actually now DS2 is 9 surely i can just go get another glass of wine? Cheers booby, and OP, and all of you on MN for keeping me ALMOST sane MOST of the time

my2centsis · 06/10/2013 01:48

I don't see why people can not lay off the wine for 9 months for the sake of their babies. Would you condone a pregnant lady have a couple of smoke or drugs a week. I really don't see the difference tbh.

OrangeMochaFrappucino · 06/10/2013 06:07

Would you put the wine in a bottle and feed it to your baby?

No. And I wouldn't feed a newborn orange juice or lemonade or hot chocolate or even water. I still drink those things in pregnancy though! Unless you have a diet of breastmilk or formula then you are consumingthings you wouldn't feed to a baby. I find this such an ill-thought out and trite response to the subject of drinking in pregnancy.

Afritutu · 06/10/2013 06:46

biologybrain-simonsays.blogspot.co.uk/2008/12/alcohol-content-of-breast-milk.html?m=1

Interesting research

I'd drink the wine

Wheresmycaffeinedrip · 06/10/2013 07:26

I would like to see if the same women who would drink the wine are the same women who would expect their husbands to refrain from drinking or going out when they reach 37 weeks just in case they go into labour. If people aren't going five weeks themselves without a drink then why do husbands get slated for being unable to do so when at least they aren't carrying the child when they do so.