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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that teacher should make sure 4 yr old has a drink?

178 replies

aliharris · 04/10/2013 20:05

OK, DS just started school, had 7 half days and then started full time this week.
All the children have to take a water bottle in, and as DS won't drink anything else, this isn't anything unusual for him. However, he always needs to be reminded to have a drink as he won't stop playing etc to have one unless he is absolutely desperate.
I quickly realised that he wasn't drinking very much and put a note in his home to school book (the messaging system). TA wrote a note that she would encourage him to drink plenty.
Today I picked him up to find he hadn't had anything to drink from his bottle at all. He said he had had one drink from the water fountain, but nothing else, not even at lunch time. I waited to speak to the teacher and she just said, "Well I remind them to have a drink, I can't check individually".
Now I realise he has to learn to drink more, but I am so, so cross that he has gone a whole day at school without a proper drink - his bottle is transparent so it's not like you can't see.
AIBU? If it continues what can I do?

OP posts:
cansu · 04/10/2013 21:50

FGS many adults on here will remember drinking at break and lunchtime only. The obsession with sipping at water bottles all day is truly ridiculous. Your ds will drink when thristy. For all those twittering on about constipation the Op has not suggested her ds has any issues with this. Please dont arrange ameeting about this you will come across as a PFB loon.

NoComet · 04/10/2013 21:54

DD2 just didn't drink at that age and still doesn't drink as much as the rest of us.

I've learnt to accept that's the way she is and she'll ask when she's thirsty.

quoteunquote · 04/10/2013 21:54

OP, our primary school has a rule that children have to have a water bottle with them on their desks, they found a vast improvement in behaviour and concentration when children drank more, especially in the afternoons.

Ours started as a part of a healthy living program, and the teachers decided they wanted the children to be encouraged to drink water.

Children tend to be active, classrooms stuffy, it makes sense to encourage children to drink water. (It also makes you less mean than wine does Hmm)

FoodieToo · 04/10/2013 21:58

Seriously,some people have no idea how much is going on in a classroom. Especially an infant classroom.

Please don't have a meeting about this....

TigOldBitties · 04/10/2013 22:04

YANBU - this is yet another reason we took our son out of school.

Are you being sarcastic?

AlwaysWashing · 04/10/2013 22:04

Damn you for being concerned about your child aliharris how ridiculous and unreasonable of you.

My GOD you people piss me off.

Granted when I was at school I think the only drink I would have had would have been at lunch time so it's unlikely that it would be to a child's detriment to do the same now. However if you are requested that your child take a drink to school then some responsibility needs to be taken by the teacher/ta to encourage children to have that drink. If it is requested that they take fluids to school it suggests that they need those fluids?? And yes, teachers are there to teach I agree but a pause somewhere mid lesson for "everyone have a drink now please" is hardly taxing or disruptive to implement surely??

This current climate of scorn for giving more than a brief flying fuck about your child is getting really tiresome.

Don't be made to feel UR Ali because you're not.

Longtallsally · 04/10/2013 22:06

Our nursery and reception encourage water drinking too, as a healthy activity. All children sit at a desk 2 minutes before playtime someone gives out plastic cups and the TA and teacher go around with a jug of water. Everyone has half a cup, more if they want. It takes 10 seconds to drink, then everyone takes their cup to the sink, and off to play.

Really shocked at some of the responses here - 'specially the one making fun of the parent who thinks sun cream is important! Our relatives in Australia have very clear rules about that. No sun cream - no going out to play. No hat - no going out to play. Again, if it matters, it needn't be a big thing.

MrsTedMosby · 04/10/2013 22:11

I work in reception. And we do have a snack time where they are told to take their water bottles and sit down for a drink and fruit. But what are we supposed to do if they don't? And bare in mind there are 30 in the class and we are dealing with them, we don't actually check they all do drink. Are we supposed to force the bottle into the mouths of those who don't drink?

MidniteScribbler · 04/10/2013 22:11

Alwayswashing The teacher has already told the OP that they are in fact doing that. What else would you like them to do? Hold the child down and pour water down in their mouths and hold it shut until they swallow?

BlackholesAndRevelations · 04/10/2013 22:13

Good Grief woman. Yabu. Our days are busy enough without inspecting the contents if water bottles to see who hasn't had a drink. The teacher is right; a reminder is all she can do.

SirChenjin · 04/10/2013 22:14

I suppose it depends whether or not you would prefer the teacher to be teaching - or standing over each child individually to make sure that they are drinking their water?

Your choice OP.

bsc · 04/10/2013 22:16

I used to suffer with terrible constipation in infant school- I ate fruit and veg, and fibre, but we didn't have access to water. As an adult, I drink a lot, and I'm never constipated- some people just need more water than others.
I can always tell when my 4yo hasn't had a drink at school, and he gets constipated afterwards too! He gets exceptionally cranky, and dry lips when he hasn't drunk enough- so shoot me for asking his teacher or TA to prompt him to drink occasionally!

IamSlave · 04/10/2013 22:16

Op I had this problem too and every day my DD would come home with a headache, and as soon as I got her to drink at home she was fine.

She is almost there now a year on - drinking water from her bottle, I say it to her every day, and reward her if at least a quarter has been drunk.

In reception when it was all new and they were getting used to it all etc, I asked the teacher to help me, and remind her to keep drinking water.

Between us we got her there!

Interesting how op mentioned a specific issue with her DC, not huge but something she would simply like help in addressing and suddenly she is translated into wanting the teachers to waste time checking every individual water bottle.

Confused
SirChenjin · 04/10/2013 22:17

The teacher does prompt the children

IamSlave · 04/10/2013 22:19

MrsTedMosby

Are you telling us that if ONE parent came and said - " would it be possible to make sure Jack gets enough water, I know he may not drink when you ask him too but would it be possible to remind him to drink a few times, or even just see if he is drinking some at snack time"

You would say ......"NO"?

beachesandbuckets · 04/10/2013 22:20

My ds drank so little water in reception that he had such bad constipation that his bum was bleeding when he went for a poo! Miraculously it disappeared almost instantly in the summer hols when he was home and drinking during day. But accept that teachers can't monitor this, so make him drink a huge drink before school, then when he gets home. Also put a drink in his lunch box, in vain, never been touched.

WipsGlitter · 04/10/2013 22:21

babababboom you took your child out of school party because they didn't get a drink of water Confused. What were the other reasons?

milkysmum · 04/10/2013 22:21

My word do not request a meeting! Unless there is obvious physical signs of dehydration he will be fine. Encourage him to have a good drink before and after school.

AlwaysWashing · 04/10/2013 22:22

MidnightScribbler of course not and I am not suggesting that the teachers supervise each child taking a drink individually. A conscious pause to remind and encourage the children to drink is not that much of an ask and is likely to egg on the reluctant ones.

Op you are still not unreasonable to be concerned about your child.

clam · 04/10/2013 22:24

"a pause somewhere mid lesson for "everyone have a drink now please" is hardly taxing or disruptive to implement surely??"

You've never been in a Reception classroom then, I take it!

There are 30 children in the room. There may or may not be a TA to support. Every second of every minute of every hour will be taken up with multiple commands/requests/queries/explanations/reminders/encouragement/you name it. The teacher has said she reminds the child. The OP has not said her child has any particular medical need for more water than the norm. The child is clearly not wanting a drink, or he would be drinking, as she has the opportunity to do.

BlackholesAndRevelations · 04/10/2013 22:25

I have had parents asking us to monitor how much food is eaten at lunch etc and yes, if it's one parent with a specific request of course we'll try to honour it.

Re: drinking, we blow a whistle to get them to drink at snack and lunchtime, and if they want a drink at a reasonable time (eg not in the middle of whole class input/carpet time) we would always let them. No drinks on tables as stuff gets wet Hmm

However- it's still not top of our list to be honest. They are very young, granted, but part of our job is teaching them independence, ie if you're thirsty, get a drink.

StarlightMcKenzie · 04/10/2013 22:27

YABU.

Why does he have a home-school book though? Do all the kids have one?

SirChenjin · 04/10/2013 22:28

They are very young, granted, but part of our job is teaching them independence, ie if you're thirsty, get a drink

^^ this

BlackholesAndRevelations · 04/10/2013 22:29

Actual LOL at pausing in the middle of a lesson for everyone to get a drink! Can you imagine the disruption of 30 kids all getting up, having a drink, a chat, a little mess about, then coming back having missed 5-10 minutes of a lesson?

Damnautocorrect · 04/10/2013 22:30

Yabu,
I'd guess when he sees the others drinking it will remind him, or when he's thirsty he'll remember.
But honestly this water bottle at school things a relatively new thing. I didn't die of dehydration at school and my ds spent the first three weeks not drinking from his or having a wee it's not the teachers responsibility.

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