To call SS?

[DontLetMeSuffercake]

Will my kids be taken away?

I really cant bare the thought of that.

Ive name changed but fuck knows why. Its so obvious who I am, my life is one big fuck off car crash. I must have been a massive cunt in a past life.

I have a 7 yo and 2 yo. The 7 yo has SN and the 2 year old has so many serious health problems its ridiculous, he breastfeeds hes on a massively restricted diet, he wakes every 30 mins (last night he managed 40 mins at one point, deep joy) and its been this way for months. Hes under specialist care and we are doing the best we can between us to remedy this.

Waking that often is a killer. But on top of that recently Im felling horrendous and Im in a lot of pain, Ive had blood tests and xrays this week because it seems to be pointing to Rheumatoid Arthritis. The tiredness is indescribable.

Im a single mum who recently got accused (wrongly) if benefit fraud. My ex lived in a caravan and stayed round 3 times a week to help me with the terrible nights. I got on the wrong side of my landlady, she reported me, they investigated, said they didnt believe me (because I couldnt prove he lived in a fixed abode, what with it being a fricking caravan). So they said declare yourself a couple or be prosecuted. So he moved in. It was horrendous and bitterly unhealthy for the children to witness.
He moved out, our good friendship damaged because of it, he is looking for flats as we speak, but cannot stay the night here ever because we are shit scared of looking like we are fraudulent again.

So, im dying of exhaustion. I cant handle any more. I know my son will wake every 30 minutes tonight, I have no friends or family within 2 hours who can help (and even if they were near I doubt they could) he one and only person who at least supported me now cant because we are scaredof getting into shit.

Im worried Im going to scream at my son tonight. What if I totally lose it?

Im fucking desperate. My life is absolute hell, I feel physically and mentally damaged by the tiredness, the illness, my sons problems and the crying and screaming in pain day in day out.

I love my sons. I absolutely hate my life.

I agree with you Westie-sleep deprivation can cause horrendous aches and pains. Well don't ot the lovely people offering you help.

DontLet I hope things begin to improve for you very soon.x

I agree with Westie, if the GP can't find any real 'causes' for your pain I'd put my money on sleep deprivation.

I do take your point about not contacting SS right now, but I would keep going with some of the other routes suggested to you, eg Homestart. These things don't happen overnight, it's as well to keep plugging away so you can get the help you need the next time you really need it.

sleeepy (((hugs)) to you.

That should be 'well done to the lovely people'

Oh and well done to the nest of vipers that is MN

Oh OP, lots of hug from here. My youngest is nowhere near as all over the places yours but does have an allergy and terrible sleep issues and it's a bloody nightmare!

On the RA issue, I've recently stopped BFing and I have found that my stiff joints have cleared up pretty much. Have you considered that it may be hormonal or linked to a sufficiency in you. Do you use any supplements to boost your vitamins and minerals. Saying all that, mine was at its worst when my son was sleeping ver little so it really could be linked to that.

I really hope things begin to improve for you soon xxx

That was meant to say deficiency NOT sufficiency!

you've probably checked this already but any chance your pain is caused by an allergy as well? also if your diet is restricted that might be why. I know that doesn't help though, sorry.

Can we all send sleep and strength vibes to OP tonight please, as she is doing the first night of a sleep programme. If we send a whole load of viper goodwill she might get a bit more sleep

Good luck Dontletmesuffer!

When I had an operation and couldn't care for dtds properly the local sure start children centre arranged 4 Weeks of 3 morning sessions at a local nursery that they funded. It have me a chance to recover and rest. It's worth asking x

Sending sleepy wishes to your DS.

Hope the sleep plan makes things easier

Sending sleep vibes

Hi OP. I'm in Sussex (E/W coast border) and work for Surestart.

Am just an office bod, but my colleagues are full of useful info and contacts and we run a monthly group for families with DC's with all sorts of disabilities and have a fab sensory room.

If there's anyway you think I might be able to help feel free to PM me.

Is there a Carers Centre near you? They should be able to help. This might just be someone to talk to, signposting to relevant organisations, checking if you are entitled to other benefits and applying for grants. They may also have a parent carers group. Personally I would approach Social Services and ask to be assigned a children disabled team social worker (if you have team where you live). I am astounded, but not surprised, that your GP hasn't signposted you to help. Things like direct payments may help you to access respite... You shouldn't just be surviving, you should be getting some help so you can enjoy your children and look after your own health. hope things are better for you soon xx

sending vibes at both you and ds2

I strongly suspect your aches and pains are more to do with your own dietary restrictions and general physical exhaustion than anything else. Which means they're fixable. Big hugs xx

I called SS when DS was young as I was falling apart, they were wonderful and my SW was an angel. So I'm glad you are keeping them in mind. Always better to ask for help.

Understand wishing for a diagnosis, I'm still waiting on knowing what is wrong with me. It's hard to feel awful and not know why. Hopefully we'll both get there in the end though, keep holding on. xxx

OP, has your GP ever considered you have fibromyalgia?

My best friend's mum has it, and it sounds similar, especially the fatigue!