to say NO to this?

[clam]

DD is in Year 11. She has been pledging to get her head down this year and work as hard as she can in order to get the best grades she can in her GCSEs.
Her school is closed for strike action on Tuesday. I think this is an ideal opportunity to put her plan into action and do some extra work.
She and her friends have hatched a plan to go to Thorpe Park for the day. She wants me to do one of the lifts (back).

I'm adamant that she shouldn't go. She's appalled (as only a 15 year old can be) that I "seriously" expect her to work on "her day off." DH (bloody lightweight!) is wavering.

Well? AIBU?

yep, you are U - she's fifteen with a cheeky day off, let her enjoy it (she will love you for it and be a much more reasonable teenager).

let her go-but you could use it as a bribe to get some extra work done next weekend!

YABU let her go and have fun all work and no plays no way to live at that age.

She has plenty of play, yet not a lot of work so far!

And generally, her default setting is reasonable and pleasant.

better to ensure she does an hour every evenibg plus a couple.on sunday morning.

let her go to TP, meanie!

Yanbu

Dd's school is also on strike, couple this with a half day for open evening and 2 other occasional days this month plus an 'E' in chemistry in the latest test means she can't miss any more of this term.

In this house she has to do what the school say is the home learning targets for her year group (also year 11, and the school says she should be doing 12-15 hours school work on top of the school day - meaning she comes home at 3.30 and does an hour and a half)

Once that's done then she can plan her social life. It's fine IMO to work til 5pm every day - that's what it will be like at work.

In reality here dd does less during the week because of extra curricular stuff and then does 3 or 4 hours at weekends

So I would only be facilitating Thorpe park if she got ahead of herself today by doing extra work

If she's loafing about and not engaged then no she wouldn't be going

3.5 days 'off' in one half term is loads of learning missed - and it's a really crucial year

Aww let her go!

I think 2 hours of homework a day sounds like a huge amount!

Can you make a deal with her? Say she can go to Thorpe Park on the condition that she does x amount of work when she gets back or something.

I don't think you are BU - I would not let my dd go either. It's not a 'day off' is it?

To be fair, she has got up significantly earlier than normal for a Sunday, and is meant to be working right now.

The thing is, she has had a fair bit of absence in the last two years, due to an on-going virus (ME-type symptoms) and suffers a bit from feeling over-shadowed by high-achieving brother (who, unprompted, is spending the day buried in his books).

But we had a meeting for Y11 this week, where they made a big thing about attendance and its effect on results.

I'm now feeling bad. She keeps shooting me these sad looks. It's like having Shrek's Puss-in-Boots in the house.

That's the government targets/recommendations for this year - loads of controlled assessments to plan for, research to do.

Dd's spent an hour practising stage make up (bubonic plague bubo's) for drama today - it's not exactly tiring

Clam my friend, you are being unreasonable. Let her go with her friends. Apart from anything, how much do you think she's actually going to do if you make her stay at home? ... and the year has barely started, so there's not a lot to review or work on, on their own.

Let her go, but with a promise that she will work extra hard to make up for it. Maybe you could organise a subsequent study party for her and her friends, with pizza and lots of encouragement and help with homework.

If you deny her this, she will resent you and resent her work. If she goes, she will have a lovely day with her friends and will probably never forget it.

But we had a meeting for Y11 this week, where they made a big thing about attendance and its effect on results

Yes, but she can't attend can she? It's not like she's asking for a day off when everyone else is in school.

Earn yourself some Mum Brownie Points and let her go.

So true chipping. If she's made to stay home she will resent being there so much I don't think she'll get any work done anyway. Let her have the day, you'll be the best mum ever and it gives you leverage to discuss regular study.

YABU. She should have the day off and enjoy herself. And go back to her studies with renewed vigour. That's the idea anyway.

Well, it's not exactly as if she spends 14 hour days slaving away at her books, with just the odd stale crust thrown her way for sustenance! She has a better social life than I do!

BUT, that said, she's a good girl, keen, willing and sweet-natured. And we've just had a long chat about the forthcoming year and exactly how she's going to put her pledges about hard work into action. So, I will let her go, but am pissed off that I'm going to have to collect them all. M25 in rush hour...

And DH has pointed out that she's done 3 hours more study today than the studious ds, who's still wandering around in a dressing gown, looking slightly dazed.

Aww clam . You are a brownie points earning legend.

Let her go, teachers are being idiots and disrupting her education so she should go out and enjoy themselves. Plus it'll annoy the teachers too