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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Am I miscarrying?

150 replies

Beavie · 28/09/2013 21:11

Sorry to hijack Aibu, I know I'm not bu for once but really need some words of advice!

I'm currently sitting in a&e, where I've been for over 2 hours now, as I am 6 weeks pg and been bleeding intermittently for over 24 hours now. It's bright red blood mixed with mucus (sorry if tmi). It comes in waves and stops and starts and the waves seem to be getting heavier. I've also had a dull pain in my abdomen most of the day, although this has been intermittent too.

Dp is insisting we stay here until we are seen even though it's a bit of a waste of time as far as I'm concerned as we've been told we will not be able to get a scan tonight so I'm not sure what they can actually do. Add to the mix a cranky toddler who should be in bed and I'm feeling pretty fed up. I just want to go home and get in the bath which helps with the aching. Anyone got any words of advice?

OP posts:
DaleyBump · 03/10/2013 00:14

Here's the link Flowers

Original poster
Beavie · 03/10/2013 00:39

Thanks for that, it's really helpful. Yikes though, I thought maybe I had got off lightly but it seems more likely that I'm just gearing up for the main event :(

Thank god for mn in times like this.

OP posts:
JaneFonda · 03/10/2013 00:45

Oh Beavie, you poor thing.

You are doing fantastically well to be keeping everything going - don't worry if you fall behind with your college work a bit, I'm sure they will help you to catch up once you're back.

Original poster
Beavie · 03/10/2013 00:48

Thanks Janefonda. Now I'm really scared as well as feeling sick. Having a bit of a weep :(

OP posts:
DaleyBump · 03/10/2013 00:51

Maybe you did, but be sure to stock up on co-codamol, nurofen, wine and a good, comfy hot water bottle just in case. Best of luck to you Flowers

Shellywelly1973 · 03/10/2013 01:00

Just want to send you a hug & best wishes op.

Take care...

Original poster
Beavie · 03/10/2013 01:31

Just thrown up/shat about another 15 times. Kind of hating being me right now.

OP posts:
lotsofcheese · 03/10/2013 07:21

You poor thing. Sending hugs & sympathy.

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 03/10/2013 07:40

oh bless you. :(
duvet day today. sod everything.

SpottyTeacakes · 03/10/2013 08:03

So sorry you're going through this Beavie. It's awful 'waiting to mc' Sad

Original poster
Beavie · 03/10/2013 09:03

Don't know what to do, I am in bed and literally can't move because I feel so sick, the kids should be at school/nursery but I can't get up to get them ready. They are currently trying to make themselves toast.

Yes the waiting bit is awful, I can't believe that after 6 days of bleeding and reading loads of stuff about mc that it didn't occur to me that it got worse than it is now until last night. Supposed to be going to a uni open day on Saturday, which I really need to do for my Ucas application, so what's the betting it happens then :(. How will I know when it's starting? Will I get any warning?

OP posts:
Purplefrogshoe · 03/10/2013 10:52

Hi Beavie, im sorry you are feeling so awful, my first mc i bled lightly for 3 weeks and then had to have erpc as it just wasnt happening, the advice i have seen is once the pain and bleeding starts to get home quickly, is the uni far from home? Are you due to go bk to the epu? Maybe they can advise, have a look at the mc boards loads of helpful ladies who can offer support amd advice

Original poster
Beavie · 03/10/2013 11:05

What is erpc? Is that the pills? I was supposed to go back to epau today for more bloods but I literally can't get out of bed so that's not happening. Just spoke to them and they still want to see me on Wednesday for another scan. The uni is just over an hour from home.

OP posts:
Purplefrogshoe · 03/10/2013 11:18

Sorry erpc is the surgical option, maybe best to wait and see how you feel saturday, hope you feel better soon its awful all the waiting and then to get a sickness bug on top of that

Bearfrills · 03/10/2013 12:52

With my first mc I had fairly light bleeding and no cramps, then I got cramps for 30-40 minutes or so and the bleeding suddenly got heavy (day 2-3 of a period heavy), then the sac passed (sorry, graphic) and the bleeding almost instantly got lighter. After that it was like the tail end of a period for around seven days, then trailed off to pinkish light bleeding, then had stopped by 12-14 days.

I really feel for you, this limbo bit is shitty.

Bearfrills · 03/10/2013 12:55

ERPC is the surgical procedure, Medical Management is the pills, Expectant Managemet is waiting for it to happen itself. I've had Medical Management (second mc) and Expectant Management (1st mc). I found the Expectant Management easier to cope with despite the waiting but everyone is different.

TarkaTheOtter · 03/10/2013 13:03

Beavie I know your dh is a teacher but are you sure he can't come home to help. He should be entitled to family leave for situations like this.

pigletmania · 03/10/2013 13:04

Oh beavie I am so sorry, sending you [flwowers] and some ginger Brew for your tummy hugs

pigletmania · 03/10/2013 13:04

Should be flowers

pigletmania · 03/10/2013 13:05

Grr Flowers sorry and more hugs

Original poster
Beavie · 03/10/2013 13:15

I guess they'll talk through all that stuff on Wednesday when I have the other scan. I honestly had no idea mc was so complicated!

I expect dp could get more time off but tbh I think we are finding it easier not being around each other at the moment. He's not dealing with it well and has been working late as much as possible to avoid coming home. I expect if I do get a really heavy bleed I will want him around, so we'll see when that occurs.

OP posts:
AnnoyedByAlfieBear · 04/10/2013 16:31

Thanks and
The 'main event' never came for me. I was kept waiting for 6 weeks, with bloods and scans every other week, until they offered intervention. I had an ERPC in the end as I wanted it over with quickly.

Although, I was PG again soon after and although I had heavy bleeding in that pregnancy, I now have a lovely 14mo DS.

I hope Wednesday goes well for you.

Original poster
Beavie · 04/10/2013 17:11

Oh that's kind of reassuring! Nothing seems to be changing really, it's just stopping and starting and generally really light, and it's been a week now. I'm just reluctant to plan anything in case it does happen.

OP posts:
AintNobodyGotTimeFurThat · 04/10/2013 19:26

I'm so sorry this is prolonged Beavie. I have been so lucky not to have a miscarriage but my sister has had 2 and it really, really hurt and upset her so I can see what effect it has on someone else and I honestly can't imagine what you are going through.

Take whatever route is best for your emotional and physical wellbeing. That's the most important thing.

Original poster
Beavie · 04/10/2013 20:13

Thanks, it's not something I've ever given too much thought to until now, but it's horrid and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. The nurse talked through the various options on the phone last night and tbh they all sounded a bit crap. I will wait and see what's going on at the scan on weds and if there's anything still there I think I will go for the surgical option as I just want to get it over with.

OP posts: