to be hacked off with people telling me it's going to be a nightmare when I have DC3?

[Apparentlychilled]

I'm 22 weeks pg with DC3. My other DC will be 5yrs and 26 months respectively when no3 arrives. I know I'm hormonal and sleep deprived, but AIBU to be hacked off by people commenting about how hard it will be having a third? It ranges from "how will you cope with 3, if this is how things are w 2", to "it's going to be a nightmare". And no, we have no serious issues with our DC (OK, DD has just started school and is having normal settling in problems but NOTHING out of the ordinary).

I was speaking to my Dsis this morning. She has 3, inc a small gap between DC2 and 3 and she kept banging on about how awful it'll be. Even when I said we're kind of committed at this stage and that I know new babies are hard work and that people commenting doesn't help. Nope, she still knows better.

AIBU to want to tell people to fuck off?

My dc3 is 9 today I survived :)
Yes the first few months were tiring but doable.
I had dc4 2 years later the prophets of doom had a field day then :)
op you will be fine.

We've always had a pretty good relationship but this has reeeaaallly pissed me off and I really can't see me thinking kindly of her again. I am going to seethe quietly about it though because DH quite rightly adores his mum. No good will come of me openly slating her. But I tell you what, she's seriously damaged her relationship with me and I will not be bothering with her much again on the quiet.

pourme- I really relate. MIL has made some really unhelpful comments about PND, both times (apparently I just needed to be grateful for what I have and get on with it) and also made comments about how we shouldn't have a third (some before announcing news, and some on the day we told PIL). Our relationship will now never be close after that crap, which I can never forget, but I accept she loves the bones of DH and DC and it's enough that she and I get on ok (as in, we can spend time together w my family).

Just try best to ignore her. Very insensitive thing to say.You'd think someone who has been pregnant, had their own children and even has a vague idea of hormone madness, even if a long time ago, would have the sense to hold back from saying that kind of shit.

Yep, esp as she used to be a nurse!

you have my permission to tell them to fuck off.

people were constantly "worried" how I would cope as are family got bigger and bigger.
when I had my MC (5th pg) my ex best friend told me it was better that way and that she is happy because she was worried how I would cope with 5.

we have 6 children now. we cope.
and that twat is not my best friend anymore.

congrats on your pg!
look after yourself.

you'll be fine.

Can't do a homebirth as need IV antibiotics for group b strep infection.

Pourne, I have it too and weighed up the risks and decided to have a home birth. My previous birth had been 3.5 hours start to finish, so the IV antibiotics hadnt been in the required 4 hours, so it was very unlikely that my homebirth would be slower. My consultant agreed, then tried to talk me out of it due to my age :o

Home birth was great :)

Really, read up on it, dont just read the scary stuff, so you are making an informed decision.

People usually make comments like that because they wouldn't be able to cope

Ignore them

I have a 5 yr old, 3 yr old and 3 month old twins and life is not that hard

We have 19mo twins and a 7mo. And it is fantastic. We are lucky that 95% of the time is a doddle.

Ignore what others say. We have switched off the the "are they twins - oh there is another as well", "don't you have a TV" (to which I normally reply "yes- that's what the ad breaks are for!) and "oh, you must have hard work". And my favourite. "You've got your hands full".

Most of it is meant as an ice breaker, or a passing comment by strangers who want to comment in the street. And yes, there are comments asking if I am getting the snip or if we had had enough by now. And the simple answer is we want no4! It's not put us off at all.

Enjoy it. It will have some challenges, and some fantastic times as well. Just smile and ignore those that want to put you down.

I wouldnt think it was a big deal at all tbh, especially if you arent working outside the home.

I had loads of this when I was preg with DS3. One (childless through choice) friend told me when I was 39 weeks that I'd. 'bitten off more than I could chew" having 3 children . There's 3 years between all of mine with the baby being nearly 9 months. It's busy, loud and brilliant. I go back to work soon, if I could turn the clock back 6 months I would. Would love a 4th and 5th but DH, he say no . Ignore the prophets of doom. Bet they're jealous!

I have 3 and the first 3 years were a nightmare and harder work than I ever could imagine. DD2 is now 4 and it's fantastic but it was a hard journey to get there. Most of my friends have 3 and feel the same as me but none of us would change it for the world, DD2 completes our family perfectly.

I have 3(I had 3 in 15 months).

I think 3 is def harder than 2 but I love it and the positives outweigh the negs hugely.

3 is the best number to have imvho.

< it was pretty hairy in the early days though>

Bogeyface - thanks for advice. Read up on it loads. I am pretty high risk for a number of reasons eg likely to be a slightly premature birth, waters breaking a v long time before baby comes out, sibling had signs of an infection and needed IV antibiotics via a canula for a week in SCBU). The next baby is likely to need to be treated in hoapital anyway for jaundice following birth if previous babies are anything to go by so I'd be unlikely to avoid the hospital experience anyway. I don't want another baby in SCBU if I can help it by taking the antibiotics during labour.

If I'm honest, even though I don't anticipate a complicated birth, I do prefer the idea of doing it in hospital so can have immediate medical assistance if needed too! My hospital is a good 30 mins away if anything goes wrong.