to lock my children in a cupboard when I need the toilet?

[FattyMcSaggyChops]

DISCLAIMER: I will never do this...I think!

Every time, EVERY TIME I sit down to do the toilet one child (usually dd1) is in 5 seconds later hopping up and down exclaiming "I'm burstttttiiiinnnngggg"

I have tried everything, asking if they need to go first, announcing I'm going, sneaking off, getting up at 5am.

I don't think my bowels can take much more!!

Lock the door and take your time. Seriously.

Leave a bucket outside the door ?! :)

YANBU if I ANBU to hog tie and gag my DCs as soon as anything comes on the TV that I want to watch!

Potty outside the door and sing loud enough so you cant hear them.

I have a shy bowel and if I'm disturbed then I can't go. So even having door locked the whining from outside affects me!!

DH seriously suggested a potty (she's 5) but I think she'd enjoy it and it's not something I want to encourage her. DH thinks it will embarrass her to not come knocking.

saggy I won't tell if you don't!

Nothing works. I just managed to stop the three kids from bursting in, and opened the bathroom door to find the puppy had been trying to batter it down as she'd missed me .

I might get an outside toilet, and lock them all in the house.

It would have been fine in the 70's - but not so much these days - unfortunately

How about putting another toilet in the cupboard instead... far less likely to get you in trouble with social services

Why only stop at when you need the toilet..? ;-)

You could let them out when THEY need the toilet!

They are safely tucked in bed (in a bedroom, not cupboard) but my bowels are in a huff!

I was just searching for bed cupboard (in Norwegian because I know they were "all the rage" hundred years ago), and I found this Cupboard that opens up to reveal bed space for 6 kids. Think it must be for hospital, or something.

I will continue my search for bed cupboard, as I think they may just do you. Having your kids bed inside a cupboard may be exactly what you need!

lol OP. It's taken me 20 years to go for a wee with my husband nearby. I can only go for a wee in public loos if the hand dryers are going.

Yanbu. Ds2,the dog and the cat follow me to the bathroom. Drives me bonkers. He says that he needs to use the loo even if he has just been! He does it to DH too. DS1, old enough to know better, will disturb you on the loo or in bath / shower because someone is on the phone for you! He gets a gritted teeth "ask them to call back then / I will ring them back" but still does it each time.