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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

13 yr old ds is wants to play GTA

99 replies

bobblechops · 17/09/2013 21:07

He's been sulking since he got home from school, apparrently every single one of his friends has it and me and his df abvu for not allowing him to play it. We do allow him to play some games such a COD, Halo, and a few others that my dp will check first to see whether they are ok but we both feel that GTA is just to adult, lots of sexual content, too much violence etc. My ds is a very very good lad, he is doing well at school and is always well behaved and is really trying not to be upset but I can see he is feeling very left out and all his friends have been teasing him a bit about not being allowed to play it, this won't change our minds but I am feeling very guilty about it, AIBU?

OP posts:

mymatemax · 17/09/2013 21:35

I am the other worst parent in the world then, I've said no to my 13 yr old & wont be changing my mind

jasminerose · 17/09/2013 21:37

Yeah they are a world away the first gta was a brilliant game from my childhood. They are a lot fancier now, but I loved the early ones much more.

MurderOfGoths · 17/09/2013 21:40

I never really played GTA (aside from Vice City), but have fond memories of other "violent" games. You just can't compare them to modern games though, for example I played Spear of Destiny loads, but it in no way resembles modern shooters, they are far far more adult.

And with GTA it isn't just the graphics which have changed, it's also got more adult in themes, even Vice City looks tame in comparison to GTA V.

KirstyJC · 17/09/2013 21:42

DH bought GTA5 today, and the language is shocking! No way I would let a 13 year old play it. Not so much the swearing as the slang type words, no way he's hearing those yet. And the violence too - the graphics are superb, it looks almost like a film, but that makes the action/violence a lot more realistic.

Soundtrack is great though - I was singing along in the background!

bellablot · 17/09/2013 21:44

This game is not suitable for under 18's, it's disgusting and def not for a 13 year old to be playing. What happened to Sonic The Hedgehog!

beingagoodmumishard · 17/09/2013 21:47

Have been chatting about this game with some parents at DS's school, and some of them have said they allow their children to play it at 6 years old but with the sound off, so that makes it ok then

MurderOfGoths · 17/09/2013 21:48

being Bloody hell.. what is wrong with some people?! A friend once called up in a fit of giggles because he'd overheard some people in a game store discussing how their children were so advanced they could play 18 rated games, as if the ratings worked the same way as in board games.

Original poster

bobblechops · 17/09/2013 21:49

Thanks everyone, I do feel better about my decision , just hope the hype dies down soon and he stops this sulking, there's nothing worse than a sulking teen, on the plus side he's actually taken himself off to bed early so should be easier to get up for school in the morning.

OP posts:

olidusUrsus · 17/09/2013 21:52

Yes, don't worry bobble. Give it some time and hopefully the other lads at school will be over the novelty and the fuss will have died down

McNewPants2013 · 17/09/2013 21:53

My son walked in why i was playing, i jumped up flicked the switch to turn it off.

I have no doubt my son aged 7 could play it, he would be better than me at the game. However he can wait until he is old enough to play it.

foxy6 · 17/09/2013 21:53

my boys 17, 16 and 14 play lots of games like cod and halo gears of war but I won't be getting them gta I feel it goes to far, to much sexual content and violence. it's not appropriate for any one to play. imo

TigOldBitties · 17/09/2013 21:56

Is he just turned 13 or is he nearly 14 out of curiosity?

I think if you're happy with your decision then great. But I wouldn't expect the hype over these type of things to die down any time soon. A rule I have used in the past is to go one rating above, so you could offer him a compromise for in the future by saying when he's 15 he can watch or play films and games which are rated 18.

I personally find the 18 rating irrelevant and think 16 should be the top age. I probably should admit my 14 year old DS has been playing the new GTA this evening but he has older siblings and really it was unrealistic not to let him, especially when I know he has access to it at cousins and friends.

beingagoodmumishard · 17/09/2013 22:04

Murder, I have to confess my judgey pants were well and truly hoicked
I know when they are very young they won't understand half of what is going on, but there must be more suitable car games to play

Remotecontrolduck · 17/09/2013 22:04

No def def def not suitable for a 13 year old! I suspect some do have it, or others maybe an older sibling does?

I'd allow 18s at 16, by then I feel they're old enough to cope with most stuff like that. Perhaps 15, depending on what the 18 was (not this game though) Absolutely no earlier!

NoComet · 17/09/2013 22:05

As the mother of two teen girls, I would rather boys were old enough to have had a real girl friend before getting the GFA view of women for hours in their bedrooms.

Original poster

bobblechops · 17/09/2013 22:06

TigOldBitties He has just turned 13, I have actually said that he would probably be able to play when he is 15, I can totally understand that if there are older siblings playing it, it would be hard not to let them play, I can also understand why he does want to play it, to me though it's just too adult for him yet.

OP posts:

LaGuardia · 17/09/2013 22:06

13 year old boys don't use bad language at school, of course, and none of them look at porn on their phones and share it around the playground. Open your eyes, people. Those boys are grown up already.

amothersplaceisinthewrong · 17/09/2013 22:09

My son played GTA or something like it at 14, but this was 10 years ago so probably not comparable. I think it depends on the child as well as the game.

way2serious · 17/09/2013 22:12

I am in exactly the same situation,OP, and had been weakening but having read this thread i will be sticking to my guns. DS's friends are all lovely and am surprised that their parents have allowed it.

TigOldBitties · 17/09/2013 22:12

As I said if you feel you've made the right decision then that's what's important.

I'd definitely say there is a major difference between being just 13 and about to be 14. It's once they get into that Year 9 territory that I've always noticed 'the change', they're suddenly rougher, older and know dirtier jokes than you. There can be a massive contrast between different 13 year olds in terms of maturity.

Just try and remind him of something he does which his friends can't to ease the pain?

Thisisaeuphemism · 17/09/2013 22:13

Why would anyone let a kid play a game that involved sexualised violence against women?

I don't get it.

cafecito · 17/09/2013 22:14

no way, it's disgusting

MurderOfGoths · 17/09/2013 22:14

LaGuardia Just because they might break the rules at other times, doesn't mean it should be the parents allowing them to do it (even encouraging them)

Original poster

bobblechops · 17/09/2013 22:15

LaGuardia I know for a fact he uses bad language sometimes with his friends, he's not a bad kid and would never do it in front of me but I have actually heard him slip up, he was mortified, I am under no illusions that he's a little angel, he's a lad trying to keep up with his friends, I just don't think the language and sexual content of GTA should be supplied to him by his parents at such a young age, I am aware that when he goes round to his friends who have this game he will most definitely not turn down the chance to play it and whilst there's not much I can do about that, I can still have a say in what he plays at home.

OP posts:

cafecito · 17/09/2013 22:15

did you all see some guy got stabbed last night for his game in N London

I think you should respect the age limits on these games, if he plays it at a friend's house that's a different matter but with your consent - a definite no in my book

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