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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not let dc have a packed lunch because they qualify for free scho meals

108 replies

ClementineKelandra · 14/09/2013 17:48

Dc have free school meals which is a huge financial help.

The problem is they are always complaining and saying they would prefer a pack lunch because of very long queues and lack of choice.

They act like I'm the most terrible mother ever because I insist they stay on school dinners!

If you tell me iabu I'll let them have their way.

OP posts:
FantasticDay · 14/09/2013 17:49

YANBU.

PuppyMonkey · 14/09/2013 17:49

I had free school dinners - there was no choice in the matter. I just got on with it.

LindyHemming · 14/09/2013 17:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MammaTJ · 14/09/2013 17:50

YANBU!! Free school meals can be a real help to those who need them. If I got them, there is no way my DC would be taking packed lunches.

My only concern is that those who need them think that their DC have been fed, so they don't then bother to do a proper meal for themselves.

Do you eat properly?

noisytoys · 14/09/2013 17:51

YANBU. My DCs have packed lunch because we can't afford school dinners but if we got them free they would have them.

Original poster
ClementineKelandra · 14/09/2013 17:54

We still have a cooked meal in the evening. So I do make sure they are getting a good diet. It's more about the money it saves me tbh. I really struggle as it is so its a huge help.

The menus are quite good at school. The problem is that if they happen to be at the back if the line on some days the choice is then quite limited once they get served.

They are teenagers btw so are experts at moaning! :)

OP posts:
LindyHemming · 14/09/2013 17:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mrspremise · 14/09/2013 18:07

THIS Grin

McNewPants2013 · 14/09/2013 18:30

Yanbu.

epic78 · 14/09/2013 18:32

Yanbu.

Guitargirl · 14/09/2013 18:32

YANBU - if we had free school lunches then I would definitely make the DCs have them whether they were keen on them or not!

AlannaPartridge · 14/09/2013 18:34

I had exactly this problem when my DS was younger. For a long while he got free school lunches - but wanted a packed one like his mates.

He got the free lunch and that was that. Adding the cost of packed lunch items to a weekly shop racks it up noticeably, and I simply couldn't afford it.

Stick to his guns on this one!

AlannaPartridge · 14/09/2013 18:35

Ooops.

Stick to YOUR guns, not his. Sorry.

BigBirthdayGloom · 14/09/2013 18:35

Yanbu. You're doing the right financial thing. Mine want school lunches but have packed because of the cost. No different.

YoureBeingADick · 14/09/2013 18:36

YANBU- if you can't afford to do pack-ups and you are entitled to fsm then you would be nuts not to send them for it.

the cost of pack-ups really adds up and I find my dcs will raid the supplies I buy before the week is done and I end up having to get more in.

Screwfox · 14/09/2013 18:37

ooh youll get Pupil premium too soon - have they told you? its worth MASSSES Of money off school trips and stuff

LynetteScavo · 14/09/2013 18:39

YANBU.

I don't let my primary school DC have school dinners, because I can't afford it (or rather, I don't think they are value for money).

They nag me for school dinners.

The grass is always greener.

My high school DS can't possibly have school dinners, because he would have to sit down, and nobody sits down to eat except girls and sixth formers (and presumably free school meal pupils). He has to have a packed lunch which can be eaten while walking around. Confused

Blu · 14/09/2013 18:41

Stick to your guns.

My DS has school dinners because I don't have time to be shopping for packed lunches and making one every morning.

Whatever choice we make as adults, and for whatever reason, that is OUR choice as the parent.

I endured school dinners for years as a child because my mother had some 'in principle' objection to packed lunch. I would have preferred packed lunch, but there you are. Wasn't my choice, no lasting harm!

LynetteScavo · 14/09/2013 18:41

Oh, yes, I forgot pupil premium. I get quite pissed off because DS is neither G&T or pupil premium... and therefore misses out on certain trips, etc.

Screwfox · 14/09/2013 18:42

god at our place PP is being "given" to parents so they can do whatever they want with it. As long as it matches the issues we think need adressing

pregnantpause · 14/09/2013 18:46

Yanbu- fsm are.there to help pay for DC to eat in school, why would anyone pay for lower standard packed lunch (presumably as finances can't be loose if fsm are offered) when you are entitled to the meal? They can 'suffer' and be be grateful!

Silverfoxballs · 14/09/2013 18:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RedHelenB · 14/09/2013 19:42

Can't they taker packed lunch a couple of days a week as a compromise?

cariadmawr · 14/09/2013 19:48

I wouldn't say your unreasonable but.we are eligible for free school meals but ds2 is.such a fussy eater a packed lunch means he eats at school . Have.done.this.since nursery school at.age 3 .

FloraDance · 14/09/2013 19:59

YANBU, TBH mine had to have hot dinner before we qualified for FSM because I wouldn't be able to cope with the added layer of stress either evening or morning. I work shifts so it's difficult to get into a routine, maybe I am just rubbish?! Also adds a bit of variety as we're veggie and pretty much vegan in the house.

Handing over pupil premium to parents sounds a bit barmy!