To think this man at the cinema was plain nasty?

[WombatCat]

Dh and I watched a film at the cinema on Saturday night.

There was a young man a few rows back from us with very vocal Tourette's. Obviously it was distracting to most people around him, but once the film started I didn't find it an issue. However, one man decided to tell him to shut up and "isn't there a special showing you could go to?"

Quite a few people appeared to be in agreement with him. I now wish I said something.

Strokey is rather odd.

Well I think most of us agree on a few things.

1 - that everyone has a right to enjoy the cinema at whatever viewing they please.

1. That the man was incredibly nasty.

I personally don't think anyone deserves to be yelled at and something needed to be done about the situation. No one seems to have addressed that point. That staff did nothing. No apologies, no warnings or removal from premesis. It is pretty scary how much abuse is tolerated in these places but that's a whole other thread.

Some have stated that they find other people distracting at a cinema. I'm pretty good at zoning out so a bit or rustling and background noise wouldn't bother me. But I don't think people should be telling other people how much they should be tolerating. Many here have sensory issues or other issues that do make some things harder to put up with. That's there problem no one else's and most have said that.

Everyone has different levels of things that they can cope with. That's something no one can change about any person no matter how hard they try. It's a physical impossibility for some. What matters is how they deal with it and obviously hurling abode at people is not the way and no one hear would stoop so low as to do that.

Abuse

these people

where? who are these people?

Do you mean the homogeneous mass that is 'people with disabilities' or their families?

Majority rule i'm afraid Good job the law doesn't agree with you.

Hurrah look at that, a sensible post. Thanks caffeine.

If only the hysteria and mob mentality, oh - and the silly arsehat jokes - would calm down a bit.

TBH I cant even be bothered to try to absorb what some of you are saying, because its so littered with abuse and sarcy put-downs.

Honestly, telling people whether they are allowed to feel annoyed is a step too far, and Id advise against it in future, for the good of your cause.

See yous

Abuse? You're the one that called me dim.

Ahh, the it's all your fault, defence.

Interesting thread...

I'm with the disabled posters who have said that we should all respect one another.

I'm a bit baffled by claims that some people might have "sensory issues" that make it more difficult for them to tolerate noise in the cinema. I have sensory issues, in that I can't bloody concentrate through other people's noise.

When I have a loud cough, I sit near the exit and leave if needs be so I don't disturb others (I have a loud cough for at least 6 months of the year). It's just polite, surely? Treat others as you would like to be treated.

I think the trouble is that some people struggle to deal with disabled people with anything else than pity.

I actually feel very sorry for them (but apparently they don't like that)

Which means that when people with disabilities or their families dare to voice opinions that aren't meek, they are perceived as some sort of abusive and extremist hive mind.

How dare 'they' not know their place.

It's ridiculous to be condemning everybody who wouldn't be able to sit through an unreasonable level of noise in the cinema as disablist. It's not disablist, noise would ruin my enjoyment of a movie no matter who it was coming from. Just because someone can't help the noise their making doesn't make it any less disruptive and irritating to others.

I hate these threads, I actually like to pretend there aren't so many ignorant bastards in the world!

When I worked as a support worker I went with a lady to the cinema. She had quite severe learning disabilities and one hell of a warped sense of humour.

During an emotive scene of the film, when the (frankly annoying) lead man had been shot, the lady I was with burst out laughing.

Two women decided to turn around and tut at us.

So I popped down to them and quietly suggested that they could fuck off and grow some humanity.

They reported me to my boss.

My boss didn't care

Is it arseholes r us season again?
If it was your kid being expected to leave places or miss out on things because of something they were born with would you quietly, meekly accept that?

Like fuck you would.

"Lookingforward" You told some people you disturbed to fuck off? Really? How incredibly rude.

Good for you, Salmon.

Noise is a major trigger for my ds, who is severely autistic, and so going to the cinema is right out for him as it would result in a meltdown. Not because of other people's noise, just the whole cinema environment would be too much for him.

But I don't see why anyone else shouldn't go if it is something they enjoy. Choices of leisure activities for those with disabilities is horribly limited as it is.

Zaby, your enjoyment does not trump anyone else's.

Might I add, if anyone told me to fuck off after they'd disturbed a movie I would have asked the cinema staff to remove them.

And Hawk, boohoo at these poor non-disabled people being discriminated against.

My heart bleeds...

Hawkmoon

Yes.

I told the two women who watched me wheel a very visibly disabled woman into the cinema, and who then turned all the way round in their seats to give her dirty looks and tut to fuck off.

She laughed. Once. In the whole fucking movie.

Youthecat - can't everyone respect everyone else's cinema/theatre/concert experience?

Do people without disabilities not deserve respect too?

Salmon - that's a different telling of the story... You only mentioned them tutting once. And you didn't mention that they knew the woman had a disability.

"Life isn't fair. We can't all experience everything. Sometimes we have to respect the big picture."

But the problem with that is that there's one person out there not experiencing anything - cinemas, theatres, ballet, concerts.

Where else do people expect quiet? comedy shows, restaurants, libraries,
schools, colleges, universities, public transport.

Are you ok with the quiet if it's at the price of some people never going to any of these things? I'm not, I might miss a line of dialogue in a film, I'm ok with that if the alternative is someone missing out on anything that people feel entitled to quiet for.

There is one thing that no one seems to have answered though.

Many have stated that they would leave. Not that they would blame any body. But they would just see it as one of those things.

Genuine question, what would be seen as the right course of action. I mean people walk out because a film is shit, or they don't understand it , or they have given up as the idiots next to them are ruining it, or a combination of distractions is such that they just can't follow the film.

Now they obviously have a right to leave just as others have a right to stay, but I'm sure most people would be a bit upset if the disabled person thought it was because of them.

We don't know the reasons some one leaves or how they are feeling but how do you protect the feelings of others in that situation. What would be the right thing to do.