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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think ONE holiday ONCE in term time should be allowed

201 replies

SilverStreak7 · 09/09/2013 16:02

Basically we booked to go away on a Sun Break (don't buy and newspaper but did buy for the vouchers) and only date we were given was next weekend .. We didn't think it would cause a major problem as my older two , when younger, came on two such holidays with us with no problems .. Now though Im given a letter (with a form to fill in) and letter says if permission is denied Id be liable to a fine or court action .. Some will say we have had six weeks for holidays, which is true, but Im on a limited income as only me and my boys and term time holidays are very expensive and I want them to at least have one holiday away . . This will not be a regular thing . ,probably won;t go again in term time.

To be more reasonable I have said if Homework is given I will make sure it is done and ready to be handed in on Tuesday

OP posts:
GreatNorthRoad · 09/09/2013 21:06

Does anyone have a feel for how rigorously the new rules will be enforced and have I understood it right? Where there are two parents with PR they each get a fine? Even if the child is away with one parent only?

glamourousgranny42 · 09/09/2013 21:07

Sorry but im sick to death of people coming on here moaning about schools being arsey because they want to take kids out on holiday. Get a grip. Yes holidays are expensive when schools break up. Its not rocket science.

I am a teacher and a single mum. I have no choice about my holidays. I do not earn a lot in fact I qualify for tax credits. We usually manage a week in Scotland but sometimes cant afford that. My kids havent suffered.

You need to see this is the context of trying to teach a whole class and the message it gives about attendance

revealall · 09/09/2013 21:17

FFS it doesn't send any message does it? If you "have" to go away in term tiime - husband in forces, religion, wedding, chance of a lifetime etc you still can.

Everyone else will still go and pay the fine because many people have bugger all choice (no time off in school holidays as well as cost).

Rufus43 · 09/09/2013 21:18

I think MN was being pretty good to start with, there were 8 YABU said perfectly nicely , 4 that could be construed as a bit snarky and 2 saying YANBU

Then the OP started using phrases like

Should have expected the holier than thou replies

Well I guess you all have dh or dp that earn megabucks

Don't think I'll bother to come on here again, full of saints!

I know the thread has moved on but I agree with candy

LtEveDallas · 09/09/2013 21:23

Agreed revealall. 2 days off is two days off. I could push my 'forces issue' and have them and DD would be no worse off than the kid who was sick for 2 days, the kid that was at mums wedding for 2 days, the kid that was with dying relative for 2 days, or the kid that booked a Sun holiday for 2 days.

It's two days no matter what the reason. I still don't get the angst.

revealall · 09/09/2013 21:30

Right so last year everyone though the head having 10 days discretion was a bad thing did they?

If you're a teacher then you get the long holidays same as the children. Yes it's a bit pants having to spend your 12 weeks off at the same time as everyone else and pay more all the time. But having the time off as at the same time as your children is the big bloody perk isn't it.
You can't complain can you

Lots of parents have to work holidays and stick their children in clubs. Having the odd day off once a year just sounds sensible.

Sirzy · 09/09/2013 21:31

Right so last year everyone though the head having 10 days discretion was a bad thing did they?

Yes

Rufus43 · 09/09/2013 21:41

revealall nope

FourEyesGood · 09/09/2013 21:59

Don't ask in AIBU if you're going to get huffy when people tell you you're being unreasonable! Confused

(YABU, by the way)

FourEyesGood · 09/09/2013 22:01

Oh. I only saw the first few posts, and didn't realise it was 8 pages! My deepest apologies for being a crap MNer. I will now go to bed.

flumposie · 09/09/2013 22:23

Another teacher here that would love to have a cheap holiday instead of always paying during August. For what it is worth I don't think £10 is typical for a trip, I would be appalled to ask a parent for that. And I would hardly consider myself rolling in money.

flumposie · 09/09/2013 22:38

Here we go again with the you have twelve weeks holiday jibes. Sick of explaining we still work during them, granted not all day every day. I know teachers that have to pay for childcare during holidays too so they can get work done. Yes, I am sure it is hard for most working parents to cover the holidays, but don't throw it in my face! We are not paid baby sitters.

FeedTheBirdsTuppenceABag · 09/09/2013 22:46

Havan't read thread but yes I agree there should be one week in a year - than that, start with the fines/threats etc.

FeedTheBirdsTuppenceABag · 09/09/2013 22:47

I think some teachers are in cloud cuckoo land as to what other people earn! Our head and teachers said they face the same costs as everyone else. Yes but with very different pay coming home!

Wallison · 09/09/2013 22:54

All my teacher friends bugger off abroad (with their kids if they have them) for pretty much all of the summer holidays. Don't get me wrong, I know that teachers work hard when they are at school, but still they get 1/3 of the year off!

Darnley · 10/09/2013 04:36

We deliberately come on holiday during them time to avoid screaming children and get some much deserved rest.

Every single time, someone turns up with their children, who should be in school.

Very much in favour of fines for this and so desperate for some peace and quiet don't care if I am flamed or being unreasonable.

Morebiscuitsplease · 10/09/2013 07:20

you.38degrees.org.uk/petitions/reverse-the-changes-to-school-term-time-family-holiday-rules
This may be of interest

neunundneunzigluftballons · 10/09/2013 07:55

Yanbu I live in Ireland people take kids out of school to go on holidays and so far I have never heard of the sky falling in. Most people go within a couple of weeks of the end of term so no work repetition with students they just miss out. Not ideal but work can be made up during holidays. And no as a teacher I do not get to take time off during term but I do get paid to be there.

Wishihadabs · 10/09/2013 08:07

I'm so confused about this.....last week literally half of dds class were "not back yet". Really anoying as we paid the inflated prices to get them back for 1st day (which was a Wednesday annoyingly enough) Are all those parents going to be fined ? Makes a mockery of the rules TBH.

comingalongnicely · 10/09/2013 08:27

Just don't tell the school & call the kids in sick on the Friday morning. It's up to you as a parent to make the decisions - half of the "law lovers" on here would be up in arms if the school tried to tell them to do something they felt was against their "parental rights".

2 days off school never killed anyone - as long as it's a one off you should be fine.

Writerwannabe83 · 10/09/2013 08:35

I don't think you are being unreasonable - what harm is taking 2 days off going to do??

I do think schools could be a bit more understanding about things like this. I think they should have a bit of compassion that some families can't afford holidays outside of term times (I don't mean you here Silver, but just a general comment) and that sometimes some leeway is needed. It isn't like you are asking for two weeks off?!

I grew up in a one parent family and there was no way my mom could afford holidays for me and my sister during holiday time and so we would be allowed to go during term time. The school had a policy that allowed any child a week at any point during off the academic year for holidays. It has however been a long time since I was at school Smile

I hope you and other families get your holidays!!

littlemisswise · 10/09/2013 08:58

We took our two out of school when necessary because DH is in the Forces. There was no way I was saying to them they weren't spending a week having fun with their father before he was deployed when there was a chance he wouldn't come back.

I am sorry but I don't care if that made a little bit extra work for the teachers.

Incidentally, the school is really, really happy to accept the pupil premium they are getting now for having Forces children and actively pursued me to fill in the forms!

It had no effect on DS1, he left school with AAB at A level, and A*s and As at GCSE. DS2 has just got 8As and 2Bs at GCSE.

CiderBomb · 10/09/2013 09:40

What annoys me is that hard up families are not allowed to take their kids on holiday during term time, but children from other cultures are allowed to swan off for weeks on end.

An example, I worked in a state run nursery for a while and we had a Chinese girl who went back to China with her parents for eight weeks to visit family during term time. Had another child done that they'd have lost their place, but because it was due to cultural issues we had to adhere to it. Never mind that the family could have returns to China for a visit during the six week summer holidays..... And don't get me started on the traveller children who will disappear for weeks, sometimes months on end.

TheOriginalSteamingNit · 10/09/2013 09:47

But going to China to see your family is a touch different from a long weekend away because you fancy it, isn't it?

And I am sure that the disappearing traveller children will have caused a lot of angst and concern among staff, but what can they do?

Thing is, what are you going to say - ok, your family is sufficiently hard up that you are allowed a holiday in term time, but family x seem wealthy enough that they aren't?

CiderBomb · 10/09/2013 09:56

It is the same because the girls parent could quite easily have taken her to China during the six week summer break. Would a British child be allowed to go and visit a relatives in say, Australia for a few weeks during term time? Would they hell as like..

All I'm saying is that there should be fairness. As long as parents don't make a habit of it then I don't see the problem myself, and I can't see what harm missing a couple of days can do to a Primary school age child anyway?

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