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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think that by the age of 32 you shouldn't be getting so drunk you throw up everywhere?

82 replies

RolandCat · 08/09/2013 16:54

A friend got so drunk on cocktails last night she was throwing up everywhere.

It was embarrassing.

She isn't 18. She is 32 and IMO she should know her alcohol tolerance level.

AIBU to think there comes a point where you stop getting so paralytic that you can't take care of yourself?

Her husband has spent the day looking after her and their 1yo dd. Which is fine if she were actually ill but this is self inflicted. She would be moaning like mad if the boot was on the other foot and he had spent the day lying on the sofa hungover.

AIBU to think she needs to grow up?

OP posts:

LadyFlumpalot · 09/09/2013 00:55

Last August we sent DS off to stay with his grandparents for the weekend. We then went out, got absolutely shit faced, danced like teenagers, ate chips n cheese from the kebab shop and stumbled home where I promptly threw up everywhere.

I was 28 at the time.

It was fantastic.

NoComet · 09/09/2013 01:07

I can only remember getting drunk enough to throw up twice after I was 18 and never after I was 22.

A few times between 14 and 18, our local pubs didn't bother with the law.

BadLad · 09/09/2013 03:44

I fully intend to be getting shit faced and loudly singing when I'm 90.

And the great thing is, at that age you can further annoy all the killjoys by pretending to be too deaf to hear them telling you that you should have grown out of it years ago.

VoiceofUnreason · 09/09/2013 08:40

If it's a one off, I think YABU. If it's not a one off, then I think you might NBU.

I had a friend once who didn't drink a great deal and I noticed she'd started to drink a bit more when we went out with friends. I just felt something wasn't right although she insisted all was fine. Next time I went round her flat I noticed a LOT of bottles put out for recycling and said "had a party?"

Next day she was on the phone because my comment had made her realise she was drinking too much. The odd bottle of beer on a Friday night had become a bottle every night and then two bottles every night. Even if she'd been out. Because she was feeling very low for assorted reasons. And poured her heart out.

The OPs question isn't the wrong one - it just depends whether it is genuine concern or being judgemental.

samandi · 09/09/2013 15:28

*Last August we sent DS off to stay with his grandparents for the weekend. We then went out, got absolutely shit faced, danced like teenagers, ate chips n cheese from the kebab shop and stumbled home where I promptly threw up everywhere.

I was 28 at the time.

It was fantastic.*

Really?

The only times I've been sick due to drink were times when I wasn't "intending" to get so drunk but hadn't eaten or for some other reason drank more than normal. I've never enjoyed throwing up when drunk, are you saying that people really do?

I really don't understand the mentality of wanting to get "shit faced".

LoopyLoopyLoopy · 09/09/2013 15:35

Oh bollocks, it's her liver. She didn't take the baby out with her, right?

marzipanned · 09/09/2013 15:51

I'm with you OP, because I remember one of the things that upset me most as a kid was seeing my parents drunk and out of control. (They weren't alcoholics; this didn't happen often or even regularly, but it has stuck in my memory.)

But I'm also probably a bit of an old fogey when it comes to drinking. I drink for the pleasure of the taste and perhaps to relax a bit sometimes, but I really don't see any pleasure at all in drinking to the point of vomiting.

Charlottehere · 09/09/2013 15:52

I love a good drinking session and I'm a bit older than 32.

LadyFlumpalot · 09/09/2013 15:52

Samandi It was honestly one of the best nights out I can barely remember.

Mostly because now I am a 29 year old adult with a job, DC and bills to pay the opportunity to behave disgracefully without consequences are few and far between.

That was over a year ago and was the last time I even thought about getting drunk. Hence why I enjoyed it so much. The vomiting part in isolation wasn't so good, but the whole package was.

LadyFlumpalot · 09/09/2013 15:54

Although thinking about it, the fact that the opportunity only arises once a year or so for me may go some way to explaining why it was so easy to get so drunk...

Charlottehere · 09/09/2013 15:57

Must admit vommings not good nor are my regular hangovers

KellyElly · 09/09/2013 15:59

She is not a seasoned drinker which is why she threw up, showing she doesn't do this on a regular basis so what's the problem? If she was necking drinks all night and didn't throw up and woke up and got on with her day at that age, then start worrying.

Charlottehere · 09/09/2013 16:00

I am the mum of 4 Dcs, 2 are under 5 that's what their dad is for sheesh

Charlottehere · 09/09/2013 16:01

Agree with kellyelly. Obviously not a hardened middle class wine drinker.

SybilRamkin · 09/09/2013 16:10

Sheesh, some people have their judgey-pants wedged so far up their arse I doubt they can walk! Get a grip, people - occasionally going out and getting tipsy isn't a crime, there are far worse things people do.

If one was expected to become a teetotal stay-at-home post-DC I doubt many people would bother having them!

BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 09/09/2013 16:12

I agree....I am 42 and I dont get so drunk I throw up everywhere........I usually find the loo and puke in there :)

Seriously, she is 32, not 132 - so what if she gets pissed and chucks up. You need to loosen up a bit OP, go and have Sex on the Beach or something!

Sallystyle · 09/09/2013 16:30

YANBU

I think it's stupid when grown adults drink so much they throw up everywhere. Have some self control and know when to stop. A one off? where you drank more than you thought you could? meh no big deal.. grown adults getting off their faces often? Immature.

I know my opinion will be unpopular but there it is.

usuallyright · 09/09/2013 18:23

getting tipsy=fine
Vomiting=vile

motherinferior · 09/09/2013 18:25

Nobody wants to throw up.

Sometimes it just errr sneaks up on you. So to speak. Ahem.

I am 50, btw.

SHarri13 · 09/09/2013 18:33

She's just not pub fit anymore, happens after a baby I find.

stooshe · 09/09/2013 18:41

Can somebody tell me why mostly "native" British people love to drink until they are wrecked? Why is it not okay to scorn this phenomenon? Trust me, if my friend got pissy arsed drunk, I'd judge her and tell her too. It can't feel good and it looks awful (from what I've seen on those "cops have to cope with some right ones" programmes).
I'm not Lady Muck, but it seems that a lot of people are denying that they are (in old time parlance), drunkards.
If I'm wrong about the denial that I think some are in, can somebody, without getting defensive explain why somebody thinking that it is their right to drink until they puke and not for enjoyment, doesn't make them a drunkard? Surely if somebody ate until they puked on a regular basis (or more than once as an adult) you would think that they had problems?

MarcelineTheVampireQueen · 09/09/2013 19:19

God this place can be hypocritical. Its okay to smoke weed, not ok for someone to smoke a cigarette two towns over while your kid is in the garden. Its ok for it ti be wine o clock and get shit faced but not outside the home.

Fwiw she might have a problem, she might not. But its not your problem so don't worry bout it. I woukd say its your problem if you were a friend looking out for her but considering your only position on this is that she is a mother and its embarrassing, this is more a judgy thread than a concerned one .

grumpyoldbat · 09/09/2013 19:33

Are you sure it's the same people who are judging and condoning? IYSWIM

EllesAngel · 09/09/2013 19:37

I'll start by saying that usually alcohol affects my stomach long before it affects me via a headache/hangover.

I don't go out often but a few weeks ago I went out for a few drinks. I spent the night drinking wine. Normally when I do go out drinking I'll get to a point where I'll start feeling slightly sick and it's then that I stop drinking and switch to soft drinks. This time that slightly sick feeling didn't come and I felt fine, until I left the venue when I started throwing up.

I hate being physically sick, I avoid it at all costs but this time it took me by surprise. The last time I was physically sick like that was about 4 years previously when, funnily enough, I'd spent the night drinking wine. I have resolved not to drink wine all night since then. I have drunk wine in between those two times but not exclusively all night. Maybe it was the cocktails that got your friend. Maybe she didn't realise just how strong they were. You're supposed to be her friend, try to stop judging her and slagging her off.

EllesAngel · 09/09/2013 19:38

Oh, and I'll add that I'm single and my dc are 19 and 20 so it was only me who suffered.

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