For my children to not have two cooked dinners?

[mrsnw]

So from next week my two, dd 4 and ds6, will be school dinners everyday. Am I being unreasonable to not cook them a dinner in the evening and just give them a sandwich or beans on toast?? What do others serve up?

If you all think school dinners are tiny and poor quality why on earth do you pay for them?
Ours are generally good quality, nutritious with ample portions. Otherwise I'd do packed lunches (which can be just as nutritious as a cooked meal).

My kids take packed lunches

But as a governor I was shocked just before the school broke up and I saw the measly amount the kids were given.

Especially feeding the year 6 kids (some of whom are 5ft 10" or taller) the exact same amount as the 4yr olds in Reception.

I honestly think most parents have no idea of how small the meals are, so we voted to have photos of them on the website.

I'm one of the main people 'slagging' off school lunches. Suffice to say mine have packed lunches...

midland - nothing wrong with a cheese sarnie, we all eat them regularly. Not on plastic white bread with extra processed carbs though.

Maybe it's a cultural thing? I have always had a hot meal when I was younger and now do it for the DDs (they eat what DH and I eat, and we all eat together). I thought it was normal to have a hot meal in the evenings - but this thread seems to suggest otherwise!

When they start school, they will eat a hot meal at dinner, be it pasta, rice with fish and veg, homemade soup etc.

It's a lovely idea mamij that the whole family can sit together an eat an evening hot meal together every night but surely in reality a lot of families don't have that opportunity?

My DH often works late/away, I usually do voluntary work or have to drive my son to various activities in the evenings, DS does scouts/sports/youth club etc. So the idea that we are all at home at 6pm or whatever to eat together is just not going to happen.

It's a lot easier if your children are much younger and you and your DH/DP work regular hours.

I think do what you like and see what mood they are in..mine have school dinners, I also think it depends on what you do all day work wise and get home time wise.

Last night mine both asked for snacky tea.. so i did chopped up peppers / tomatoes / cucumber / salad / tuna wraps with mayo and sweet corn / bag of crisps.. yogurt for pudding!! They ate it all and i didn't have to cook after a long day at work I ate the same - my DS are 9 & 6 and tonight we all had beans on toast with an egg.. washed down with some (petrol station) shop bought rocky roads (shock horror!!)

I don't enjoy slaving over the oven after a long day at work and enjoy doing quick simple meals so we can spend some time chatting and playing and walking the dogs. Less dishes, less mess and full children, and no lunch boxes to faff over each morning.

School dinners round here are bloody awful so I'd certainly wanting mine having something with veg etc, but if the school dinners are good then YANBU

I'm not slagging off school meals, I'm saying they aren't what the glossy menus make them out to be, so people should base their evening meal decisions on their child having had a light lunch unless they absolutely know otherwise.

Try it and see how they react to it.

If they complain of being hungry, or are tired or grumpy, they probably need the second big meal.

If they are comfortably full and happy it's probably fine.

I tend to do scrambled eggs once a week, sandwiches etc another day, baked spud on swimming nights and then something like pasta, fish fingers, chicken and rice on the other nights - a bit mix and match.

Thing is scrambled eggs and omelettes are, erm, cooked. This seems to have been entirely overlooked in this discussion.

And sandwiches aren't exactly raw either, what with all the bread and such like involved.

Oh shit, you're right.

I'll give the little bastards grated carrot on Monday. That'll learn 'em.

Most people don't mind school dinners being small, as most people provide a substantial meal in the evenings

really? that's not my experience at all....the ones who have school dinners in the main do so either because they are on FSM, or because they have 2 parents working, little time to cook after work and running about taxi-ing kids to activities, and provide only a hurried "tea" at home. They are also the ones with more disposable income, so able to afford school dinners. Our school dinners cost £2.30 but mine have a packed lunch and main meal at home - no way do our family meals cost that per person.

A sandwich, half a bag of crisps, bit of salad (and I mean carrot sticks, cucumber sticks, cherry tomatoes etc). Yogurt for pudding. Or a small bun. This is sufficient. Even for my 10 year old who does two hours of dance every night!

However it would be boring every night. Therefore I sometimes do soup and crusty bread. Or jacket spud. Or beans on toast. Play it by ear.

Yanbu though.

OK, didn't mean to offend you but I still do not agree, round here at least, that "most people" provide a substantial evening meal. Most don't.

Also IME, when people have a guest child over, they may actually provide different to the usual fare, for fear of being judged ie "IABU DS went to a friends house for tea and it was just a cheese sandwich and a bag of crisps followed by an apple. IABU that mother is so lazy and a bad host. DS has a school lunch but needs another 2 course hot dinner every day"

I think if there are two working parents getting home tired at the end of a long day, it is very tempting not to cook. The temptation is to get a ready meal out or to do a sandwich. But I think we all know this is a product of tiredness/laziness. Sandwiches are not that appetizing. As an evening meal they are a pretty horrid solution really. Same with ready meals.

There are two FT working parents in our household and we never resort to ready meals or sandwiches in the evening. It's not necessary. You just have to practise being a secret slattern. I can whip up a tasty and nutritious hot meal in the time that it takes to make sandwiches for four. I can really and truly. Anyone can.

And btw, phantom, I think you are looking for validation on the sandwich-as-an-evening meal front. No-one I know (in multiple sets of parents) has or ever would serve a sandwich as an evening meal.

I do angst about what to feed visiting children.

My most day was with a child I knew to be fussy but I'd discreetly talked to his mother to make sure he'd be catered for.

The pizza was All Wrong. I made him a jam sandwich. I've never seen a child look so relieved.

Oh, I do agree it's laziness/a cop out to some extent , I meal plan and shop accordingly- we have quicker but still nutritious meals on the days we are in late/back out again, and I cook and freeze for quick dinners. We don't do bought ready made meals at all because DD cant have gluten.

But I still think its OK not to have 2 cooked dinner-type meals a day as long as the diet is balanced.

If you are so worried about nutrition and your children are so ravenous all the time then school dinners must be an utter waste of time. That being the case I don't think anybody has any room to be smug about providing 2 cooked meals a day for their child. Why do you waste you money on crappy school lunches if you then have to provide a cooked meal in the evening? It is madness. Make them a decent packed lunch (or better still get them to make it themselves if they are old enough) and save your money and save your children from second rate food.

There is nothing wrong with a packed lunch or a cold tea - nobody 'needs' 2 hot meals a day. I don't see either of those being any worse than some of the meals so many of you are quick to call inadequate .

Mine have packed lunches and a hot tea. They are never 'ravenous' but they enjoy and eat the meals that are provided with a perfectly healthy appetite. Maybe some of you should be thinking of doing the same and then your children wouldn't be going hungry.

That's exactly what I said big

What is the point? You can't say you care so badly about your child's nutrition that you provide two hot meals a day and then feed them the school shit. It just doesn't add up.