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AIBU?

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Original poster

Friend fraudulantly claiming tax credits as a single mum

149 replies

OrangeFlower7 · 26/08/2013 18:36

I am getting increasingly exasperated with hearing the woeful stories from my friend - she and her husband 'split up' at the start of the year but are now back together / still living together. She is always saying how skint she is, since getting married (was a single mum beforehand) as her tax credits claim stopped. So, when they split up, she started a new claim as a single parent with a low income. He has a full-time well paid job. So now they get housing benefit for their 1.1K/month rental house, a high tax credits award of about 10K plus his money from his job...it just seems a bit unfair for her to keep moaning on when we've been struggling with DH being made redundant and getting by on some self-employment but really trying hard each month to get the money together for the mortgage bills etc.

WWYD? What should i say next time she moans on? Do you think, I should report them for tax credits fraud?!

OP posts:
SigmundFraude · 26/08/2013 19:29

Report her. Why wouldn't you?

RedlipsAndSlippers · 26/08/2013 19:31

I'd report, it's theft, no matter how you feel about the benefits system. And yes, the constant whining would annoy me too.

CoffeeandScones · 26/08/2013 19:31

But yes, report it.

needaholidaynow · 26/08/2013 19:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ellie58 · 26/08/2013 19:41

Sorry but what buisness is it.of yours?? some friend you are seeking advice from strangers if you should report your "friend" not because you think.its wrong but because you are sick of her moaning!! if anythink at all you should at least have the decency to say it to her face and see what shes got to say befor you report her but as you say its him who has the full time great paid job and by the sounds of it they arent very stable atm so ever thought mayb SHE is skint with marriage troubles and a small child so last thing shes thought of is her benefits!! I wouldnt report her id talk.to her mayb you will find out she needs a friend not an investigation into her benefits!!

MotherOfDragon · 26/08/2013 19:43

Are you sure her husband isn't withholding money and she needs those credits to get by? OTOH report her.

Original poster
OrangeFlower7 · 26/08/2013 19:44

Hi Ellie, she gets the tax credits as its her claim

OP posts:
picnicbasketcase · 26/08/2013 19:45

I would never want anyone to be in dire financial straits because of losing benefits that they are entitled to. The point is, she isn't. People everywhere are struggling.

I would also find it very difficult to report a friend but this situation is simply not acceptable.

edam · 26/08/2013 19:48

I'd keep your nose out. You aren't interested in the plight of the taxpayer, you resent listening to her. If you reported her, you would be acting out of spite, not genuine concern for the public finances. Spitefulness is wrong. If she wants to do something wrong, that's her own moral burden and her own look-out.

SubliminalMassaging · 26/08/2013 19:51

Spiteful or not, she's within her rights to report a crime.

Would you say the same if she knew someone who had raped a woman, or assaulted an elderly lady for her handbag, and decided to report because she was sick of hearing him brag about getting away with it?

Or is that different?

Hegsy · 26/08/2013 19:51

stuntgirl I was thinking the same Hmm either way I'd report.

JenaiMorris · 26/08/2013 19:56

What edam said.

BrokenSunglasses · 26/08/2013 20:01

Next time she moans I would politely tell ask her not to talk about money, as you have enough problems of your own concerning money and you'd rather not dwell on it.

And you should report her. I think you have a moral and social responsibility to report someone who you know is committing fraud.

edam · 26/08/2013 20:01

Yes, it's different. Because in your scenario there's a clearly identifiable individual victim who has been hurt. And because reporting a rapist or mugger is motivated at least partly by concern for their victim/future victims. Not out of spite.

themaltesefalcon · 26/08/2013 20:03

Disgusting people, everyone who said they would report their "friend" in this situation.

jacks365 · 26/08/2013 20:05

Edam to sit back and knowingly do nothing about a crime being committed is morally wrong however you look at it. This is fraud it is serious and takes from both tax payers and genuine claimants.

dirtyface · 26/08/2013 20:09

surely the DSS will find her out even if no one grasses her?

i thought they had systems in place?

like when you read in the papers about people on disability getting caught line dancing or hanggliding or whatever because they are being followed by cameras (i know slightly different situation)

emuloc · 26/08/2013 20:10

I agree with Edam too. It sounds like you resent her getting something you feel she is not entitled to while you are struggling. Well you are not the only one who is finding things hard. It will not improve your lot if you report her. Look after your own affairs and dont harbour bad feelings towards your friend if you are unable to do that I suggest you distance your self.

Viviennemary · 26/08/2013 20:21

The disgusting people are the greedy people who fraudulently claim benefit. Benefit is for people who are entitled to it and need it. Not for selfish cheats.

Hegsy · 26/08/2013 20:24

Disgusting themaltesefalcon? Really? Hmm I think that says more about you than the people who would report. The friend is committing a crime, she is taking public money which could go elsewhere. This is money that my and everyone who works taxes pay towards and to be honest it pisses me right off. The friend is the one who is disgusting!

Original poster
OrangeFlower7 · 26/08/2013 20:25

I don't think I feel spiteful, more a kind of feeling of wrongness / unfairness tbh. Don't know if will report them though. Gives you perspective getting opinions from others though.

OP posts:
Onesleeptillwembley · 26/08/2013 20:27

Report the thieving skank.

janey68 · 26/08/2013 20:28

Hmm interesting 'logic' from some posters .. I wonder whether they would report a theft if it was the property of someone who was wealthy and could easily afford to replace the stolen items or replace through insurance? If there was no personal trauma to the victim? What about theft from shops? No clear individual victim there. What about someone who regularly drink drives but by the grace of god hasn't killed or maimed anyone - yet? There is no clear identifiable individual victim in those cases.
Surely the point of having a civil and criminal justice system is that it's a system which applies to everyone... Not a pick n mix where people choose the bits they happen to personally like

Original poster
OrangeFlower7 · 26/08/2013 20:28

Also, I feel a kind of strange worriedness about if it keeps going on it will only get worse! As far as I can see and from a few things she's said some of it is getting frittered away....

OP posts:
SybilRamkin · 26/08/2013 20:31

Report her. She's stealing, and taking money away from those who really need it as well as being another 'typical example' the Daily Fail can trot out as an excuse to benefit bash. People claiming honestly should be able to do so without stigma, which your 'friend' is actively working to create.