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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hate parents like these?

56 replies

PattieOfurniture · 20/08/2013 20:35

Went out with dc today, a safari park with theme park rides and every fucking time we go somewhere like this there's always a kid or several crying their eyes out on a ride while their parent forces them to go on, I always feel so sorry for the kids and feel like slapping the parents.
Aibu?

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SPsTotallyMullerFuckingLicious · 20/08/2013 20:37

My brother was one of those who would nag and nag to go on a ride and parents would tell him he wouldn't like it. He wouldn't listen and would spend the whole ride crying and screaming.

Nothing my parents could do til the rode finished. He just wouldn't listen.

HeySoulSister · 20/08/2013 20:38

I never see that!

Original poster
PattieOfurniture · 20/08/2013 20:42

There were two boys in the queue and one was saying no mummy I don't want to go on it and she was saying to him, you'll like it when your on it doesn't go fast, anyway your brother wants you to go on with him. The poor kid was literally forced into the seat and cried his eyes out the whole time Sad

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Original poster
PattieOfurniture · 20/08/2013 20:44

Fair point sp, but just say and mean no in future.

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foreverondiet · 20/08/2013 20:46

Don't judge. My daughter was like that - but then if she doesn't go on in cries later that she missed out.

LynetteScavo · 20/08/2013 20:48

I've never seen this type of parenting.

I did come across a parent of an anxious child once, who just wanted to be near her/sleep in her bed etc.

She was having none of it.

That was five years ago, I'd I've worried about that little boy since.

SPsTotallyMullerFuckingLicious · 20/08/2013 20:49

Pattie My brother is 21 now. I dont think my parents saying no would make a difference now Grin

Original poster
PattieOfurniture · 20/08/2013 20:49

It's not a nice situation for either party and a nice day out ends with tainted memories.
So why go to those places if you know it's going to cause upset?

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BarbarianMum · 20/08/2013 20:51

My kids are by nature very hesitant at trying new things - swimming in the sea, new zip line in the park, ramp in skate park, climbing wall at Beaver camp etc. So I definitely force encourage them to give things a go (I once pushed ds1 down a tube slide he was dithering about, he was 2). They always end up loving it.

So, if you know your child, 'persuading' them may be fine.

GangstersLoveToDance · 20/08/2013 20:56

There were two boys in the queue and one was saying no mummy I don't want to go on it and she was saying to him, you'll like it when your on it doesn't go fast, anyway your brother wants you to go on with him

That is, quite literally, the exact wording of the conversation I had with my ds's age 5 and 3 last week whilst waiting in a kiddy rollercoaster queue.
Ds2 wanted to go on...ds1 was more than a bit apprehensive, hence the conversation above.

Ds1 is like this before every ride, everywhere. He genuinely does enjoy it when he's on though and often asks to go on again. The one time he stood to the side and ds2 went on something alone, he cried his eyes out.

To 'hate' me and judge me on this situation? YABU.

LynetteScavo · 20/08/2013 20:58

I have been called a namby pamby parent for not forcing my DC to do things.

But I have taken my DC on them park rides in a lamb to the slaughter way. Well, DH has, while I browsed in the shop. No crying from DC, because they did 't know what was coming. They always went back for more though. Grin

The only thing I have ever forced my DC to do while crying is have blood taken. Medical necessity.

But my DC do trust me. When I say it will be fine when they are unsure, they know it will be.

PoppyWearer · 20/08/2013 21:02

YABU. You have no way of knowing the background to what was going on based on what you heard/saw.

Original poster
PattieOfurniture · 20/08/2013 21:08

I can't believe people think it's ok to do this to children!
Whatever the background or reason! It's a fucking fair ride! It's not for the good of their health, ffs.

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MrsDeVere · 20/08/2013 21:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsOakenshield · 20/08/2013 21:10

DH 'forced' DD to go on the helter-skelter once. Screamed all the way up and all the way down. She then proceeded to insist they went back on about 4 more times and has hardly shut up about it since. Bizarrely, as her father, he knew that she would love it once she'd done it.

ReallyTired · 20/08/2013 21:22

When you have more than one child there is often has to be some give and take when doing various activites. Last week I forced my son to go swimming because dd was desperate to go swimming and I could not leave my son at home. Conversely I forced my son to go to the beach because dd wanted to make sandcastles.

I think its sad when parents force children to go on rides on a theme park. Prehaps theme parks should provide a creche that parents can pay off so that siblings can go on interesting rides.

Original poster
PattieOfurniture · 20/08/2013 21:25

Ds1 used to be petrified of any ride, even the ones outside supermarkets that you put 50p in. We just accepted it. Then when he was about 6 it all changed and now he wants to go on everything. It will happen naturally, if it does. My niece who is 13 is still too scared to go on anything. Nothing wrong with that, we're all different.
I think forcing it is wrong, even if it does have a happy outcome and the child wants to go on again. But if it doesn't have that effect you could put them off for life.

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Beamur · 20/08/2013 21:28

I'm the one crying while DD insists we go on...

littlemog · 20/08/2013 21:28

For hating people and wanting to slap them YABU.

Just that really.

sparklingstars · 20/08/2013 21:31

We all went to Disneyworld a few years ago, when we got there our youngest decided that they would not go on any rides and cried at the thought of going on the first ride - a Dumbo the elephant ride. We insisted because that was why we had gone there and we knew she would like. She cried and fussed but we did it anyway. She climbed off the ride and immediately asked if she could go on it again.
YABU as you don't know the child or the family.

WorraLiberty · 20/08/2013 21:34

I spend 6hrs in a theme park yesterday and didn't see anything like that

Original poster
PattieOfurniture · 20/08/2013 21:39

Well there's plenty on this thread that have done that worra.

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PoppyWearer · 20/08/2013 21:40

My DC1 is generally an anxious child, but usually drags us on to rides, even the scary-looking ones.

Usually our conversations are along the "are you SURE you want to go on the big roller coaster?" lines (DC1 is 5yo).

But it could equally flip the other way if a child is tired. You just can't judge based on a small snapshot of someone else's life.

Isildur · 20/08/2013 21:46

We have annual passes for the local theme park. Every day without fail my 5 YO will cry his way through the first ride on every roller coaster/flying elephant/helicopter.

Then perk up, and demand to be taken on again and again.

The child's parents know them better than you do. Concern your self with your own children; content yourself with the fact that other parents know their own children best.

Original poster
PattieOfurniture · 20/08/2013 21:47

Poppy, but you're not forcing him to go on, what I'm talking about is parents physically forcing children kicking and screaming on to a ride, strapping them in a seat and watching them bawl their eyes out the whole way round.
Also a dad having a go at a little girl because she was scared of the rides and him telling her "tough, I'm not going to waste thirty fucking quid because you won't go on anything' < Alton towers, last year

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