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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to consider going away on my own for a weekend?

86 replies

swallowedAfly · 09/08/2013 12:26

i took ds to egypt for 2 weeks in july so he has had a good holiday this summer already.

i'm a single mum and only work term time (though i start back a bit earlier than him in september).

i am going stark raving mad.

would it be horrible of me to go away for a weekend without ds? he would stay with my parents and i would probably go visit a friend or possibly even just disappear on my own entirely somewhere?

is it bad to spend money and time on myself rather than take him with or just suck up the fact that summer holidays 24/7 parenting is driving me insane?

i don't actually know where i'd go or what i want to do so that's a question too - what would you do if you could manage to carve out a weekend to yourself?

OP posts:
sillymillyb · 09/08/2013 12:46

Your not being selfish! You are selflessly allowing your ds to spend time with his beloved GPS!!

It's not your fault that while this is taking place you will have to be at a spa, reading a book, eating lovely food and having lie ins. Just to keep yourself distracted from missing him you understand, ahem!!

God I'm jealous!

Original poster
swallowedAfly · 09/08/2013 12:47

i thought the yard arm was 6pm reeling?

i'm willing to be told otherwise. i even have ice in the freezer.

i've never been to edinburgh.

i would like somewhere with a guaranteed supply of beautiful young men with a thing for older, wiser women.

OP posts:
reelingintheyears · 09/08/2013 12:48

Ah well, I thought the yard arm was midday!

Ant excuse. Grin

reelingintheyears · 09/08/2013 12:49

*Any

Original poster
swallowedAfly · 09/08/2013 12:49

oh someone mentioned cocktails. i seem to vaguely remember a time where friends and i would meet up of an afternoon and drink jugs of cocktails in the sunshine.....

he is 6.

OP posts:
Original poster
swallowedAfly · 09/08/2013 12:50

it would probably do MN a favour too as i'm turning into a cranky bitch on here arguing on threads i should just stay.away.from.

OP posts:
comingintomyown · 09/08/2013 12:50

Get yourself to Bath then SAF (I used to live there) its heaving with men Smile

reelingintheyears · 09/08/2013 12:50

Handsome young men eh?

'Fraid I can't help with that one being an old hag attractive young thing myself.

Original poster
swallowedAfly · 09/08/2013 12:51

heaving with men you say? Shock

OP posts:
confused3331 · 09/08/2013 12:51

I'm off this weekend with a friend. Don't feel guilty. You deserve a break ! ESP being a single parent.

runningforthebusinheels · 09/08/2013 12:52

yanbu. I'm so craving me-time at the moment I've stayed up till 2am the last 2 nights, watching films an MNetting.

confused3331 · 09/08/2013 12:52

Men oh go to Italy :) very attentive they are

reelingintheyears · 09/08/2013 12:52

Six is fine, he'd love staying with his GPs, I used to dump let mine stay with my Mum as often as she'd have 'em. Grin

Mouseyinmyhousey · 09/08/2013 12:53

Absolutely not selfish or horrible. If your ds is anything like mine he'll be really happy to go to grandparents for the weekend anyway.

I'd probably have a city break somewhere, or a walking trip, something you can't really do with kids in tow, but there's loads you could do.

If you don't end up having a weekend away, you could just book into a spa for a night or even just the day? Or have a nice day to yourself in town shopping and a nice lunch somewhere.

Jan49 · 09/08/2013 12:55

No, you are not being at all selfish.

I'm a single parent and have had a few weekends away on my own whilst my ds has been at his dad's. It's brilliant.Grin

I always go to the seaside and I love it. I go by train and enjoy the peace of a journey with no one to have to entertain or talk to, stay in a bed and breakfast, walk on the beach, sleep in the afternoon lol.

I've come across quite a few people who think I'm weird for wanting a trip away on my own and even horror of horrors, some who have tried to accompany me or meet up with me on my very precious weekends away, so I actually no longer tell people I'm going.

ClaireandGeorge · 09/08/2013 12:56

Sounds fab, I'd love a weekend away on my own and I'm not a single parent. dp and me are escaping for a weekend in Dorset in september and I don't feel guilty at all. ds is going to grandparents who live about 2 hours away and they will kove having him.

BiddyPop · 09/08/2013 12:56

I am not a single parent, but DH works overseas a lot (not quite 50%, but it's been very close to that the past year - 2 weeks away, 2 weeks here - and working FT when here too). So I never get a proper break (DD has SNs too) - I have recently started to dream about doing this and leaving the 2 of them alone for the weekend here while I disappear with a book, swimming togs, plans for wine and a log fire, and hot dinners. I don't even need to go overseas, although I'd love it, just peace and quiet and no one expecting me to organise everything and do most things (between work, home and DD - there's too much for 1 person to do it all). Even a day off at home never works out anymore, as DD has happened to get sick the last 3 times I tried, and the au pair is always there anyway so I can't just lounge around - but AP is out every night between classes and sports and social life.

No AP over the summer, I am meeting friends for dinner one night next week so DH in charge, and new AP arriving in 2 weeks will find me expecting her to DO 1 mid-week babysitting night weekly and occasional weekend ones as well (contract is for 2 per week but it was about 1 per month we got from last one).

Absolutely go!!

GlaikitFizzog · 09/08/2013 12:56

Edinburgh is full of lovely young men selling themselves their shows! Town is buzzing.

If you stay a little out of town and get the train in will be much cheaper than staying city centre.

BlingLoving · 09/08/2013 12:57

Don't think twice, just go.

And if you're really worried about the money, ship him off to your parents and stay at home by yourself. Plan a few treats - trip to your local spa/night out with friends or whatever - and just enjoy the peace of your own home.

If you can afford it, go stay in a nice hotel somewhere in beautiful gardens and just relax - sit by the pool, take walks, get a massage, eat good food and enjoy a good book in the bar.

comingintomyown · 09/08/2013 12:59

Wall to wall Wink

reelingintheyears · 09/08/2013 12:59

Forget all the 'Am I Being Selfish' stuff and start planning.

I have to go to work now...BOO Sad

reelingintheyears · 09/08/2013 13:00

I'll be back later to find out where you're going Grin

Original poster
swallowedAfly · 09/08/2013 13:04

you get to go to work you lucky bugger! Envy

i'm second guessing myself and holding off on a decision because on top of the aaaarghhh of summer holiday full time parenting and no escape to work i am seriously premenstrual and this may be skewering my thinking and urgent need for space.

glad to hear it's not just me who dreams of running for the hills.

OP posts:
grabaspoon · 09/08/2013 13:04

I am a live in nanny this week my bosses have been away so have utilised having the whole house to myself watching all my trashy tv, eating when I want, long lazy lie ins with no children to wake me and just chilling.

If you can't get away maybe a long lazy weekend at home like above could help you recharge

Original poster
swallowedAfly · 09/08/2013 13:05

oh and jan that sounds heavenly. it's exactly that isn't it? just being uninterupted and pottering and chilling to your hearts content.

seaside sounds a good plan. the sea is very soothing.

OP posts: