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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to give dd food before paying for it?

735 replies

cantsleep · 29/07/2013 22:20

Went to shops today with dcs. Dd was a bit tired and hungry and I wanted to get in and out quickly and home.

She was very hungry and has health issues and needed to eat that minute so I picked something up and let her have it. I have not done this before but couldn't have gone and paid then given it to her and continued shopping as she needed to eat straight away. Usually I have a snack in my bag for her but she had already had that one and I was going to buy more snack bits for her from the shops to replenish the ones I carry for her.

I noticed that a shop assistant was watching us intently and kept seeing her as we went round the shop.

When we got to the till I took the packet off dd for the man to scan and gave it back to her. As we were leaving the member of staff who had been watching approached us with a security guard and asked had we paid for what dd had eaten round the shop. I replied yes we had but she asked to check the receipt which obviously was fine.

She then told me that in future we HAD to pay for food before consuming it. I explained to her that it was a one off as I had run out of snacks I usually carry and dd needed to eat immediately but the security guard said food has to be paid for first.

It wasn't like I do this all the time and tbh as long as the food is paid for does it really matter?

WIBU to have let dd eat her snack before we had paid for it?

OP posts:
Rootatoot · 31/07/2013 10:36

When I have occasionally done this to avoid a toddler meltdown, I have asked an assistant if it's ok first. Been fine in Morrisons and Sainsbury's doing this.

ZingWidge · 31/07/2013 10:42

good call Ems

the last thing to add before hiding this thread: HalfWidges exist.

ZingWidge · 31/07/2013 10:44

rootatoot

that is the best and most sensible post on this entire thread.
thank you!Thanks

that's the answer folks. ask!
job done

< bangs gavel >

Rootatoot · 31/07/2013 11:03

Zing you're welcome! LOL ! :)

inneedofsomehelpplz · 31/07/2013 11:07

root - you talk sense - maybe others can follow your lead :-)

Emilythornesbff · 31/07/2013 11:09

Good to see that it is allowed.
Sensible approach.

inneedofsomehelpplz · 31/07/2013 11:32

oh emily - do you ask or just help yourself? think we all know the answer to that lol.

Emilythornesbff · 31/07/2013 11:41

Both.

I said it was a sensible approach, not that I have always done it.

Besides. You appear to have changed your own view from it to being allowed to it being ok with The permission of a member of shop floor staff.

Anyway.
I stand by my original point that it's no biggie.
I don't think that makes me "entitled" or "speshal" as has been suggested. Just that I don't see it as a big deal.

inneedofsomehelpplz · 31/07/2013 15:26

well to all you grazers out there, either dont do it or ask persmission or better still pay for it before you do your main shop! & of course staff dont know if you are eating brought in food or food off of the shelves hence grazing theft is at a high hence shops not allowing it. grazers know theyre in the wrong hence the silly posts re: car parking ect. ive never seen an all you can eat buffet shop tbh.

inneedofsomehelpplz · 31/07/2013 15:36

well to all you grazers out there, either dont do it or ask persmission or better still pay for it before you do your main shop! & of course staff dont know if you are eating brought in food or food off of the shelves hence grazing theft is at a high hence shops not allowing it. grazers know theyre in the wrong hence the silly posts re: car parking ect. ive never seen an all you can eat buffet shop tbh.

tabulahrasa · 31/07/2013 15:47

"I stand by my original point that it's no biggie.
I don't think that makes me "entitled" or "speshal" as has been suggested. Just that I don't see it as a big deal."

It's not a big deal, I don't actually care if other people are eating food that belongs to a shop... I'm only discussing it because there's a thread on it.

But it's still not theirs until it's paid for and they have permanently deprived the owner of it well before they leave the shop.

Neither me not caring and the shop accepting that it happens so not making a big deal of it every time it happens, or in fact any other thing like whether people care that other people eat too much or that children don't like shopping makes any difference to the fact that it isn't their property and they have just eaten it.

Caboodle · 31/07/2013 16:04

One thing I am actually sure off now....next time I let DC3 'graze' (IE eat packet of raisins out of multipack) I'll be sure to check out all the other shoppers to see just how many A) actually notice B) actually care. Never once have I been stopped by a member of staff (maybe I just look honest Wink )
Anyhow....made my day this thread. Thanks ladies. Grin

Caboodle · 31/07/2013 16:06

Off? Of! In my defence - child has just squirted Ribena all over me. (.....waits for post about DC3 having rotting teeth...)

ZingWidge · 31/07/2013 17:01

caboodle

giving him ribena! that is the worst thing I ever heard! unless if it's organic
what next? ice cream?
I think you should get him baby/kiddy dentures right now, just in case.

Grin
Ilovemyself · 31/07/2013 17:09

Inneedofsomehelp. Are you actually telling us what to do? As you have spoken I guess we should all bow and worship your importance.

Ilovemyself · 31/07/2013 17:15

Tabulahrasa. It is about intent. You do not intend to permanently deprive the shop owner. Just like when you go to a restaurant. Or just like when you fill up with petrol and find your wallet or purse is on the table at home

inneedofsomehelpplz · 31/07/2013 17:18

ilovemyself (what an apt name) - i am simply pointing out what is allowed in a shop & as a manager, i think i know. so, not telling people what to do (well i am) but confirming shop policies. but someone who loves themselves can do as they please :-) keep on grazing lol just dont compain/whine/bitch & get humpy when told off. ITS NOT ALLOWED! Simplze.........

MrsKeithRichards · 31/07/2013 18:03

Arf @ grazing theft is at a high.

It's not actually a thing is it?

inneedofsomehelpplz · 31/07/2013 18:14

& you work where richards? pmsl @ no such thing - no-one eats & steals. can i live with you in your magical fairy land plz?

ZingWidge · 31/07/2013 18:37

Grazing Theft - sounds like a cocktail to me!Grin

JugglingFromHereToThere · 31/07/2013 18:40

How about you InNeed - where is it you work again ?

  • where the priority is evidently the stock and not the customers, especially those shopping with children
ZingWidge · 31/07/2013 18:45

Ryanair?

inneedofsomehelpplz · 31/07/2013 18:59

of course the stock is a priority - its not a fukin one stop charity shop! suprisingly i can control my dc when shopping without resorting to helping myself. amazing isnt it - i have 4 dc with me & we.play games & talk - i dont use food as a distraction. its called parenthood. im bored of this thread now as despite it being wrong, people will always have a sympathy vote for doing it. see ya freeloaders (sorry you all pay for grazing gluteny :-P)

ThisReallyIsNotSPNopeNotAtAll · 31/07/2013 19:03

You really are in need of some help with all those strange emotion faces you are using.

In all seriousness I enjoy been a grazing freeloader and will do it when I feel I need to. I want to cut corners when parenting so I will.

poppingin1 · 31/07/2013 19:07

On my way to do the weekly shop and thought of this thread Grin

DD will most likely be peckish when I get there so wish me happy grazing Wink

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