Please interact with your kids, not your i-whatsit!

[oldgrandmama]

It's depressing - seeing mums with babies and toddlers in buggies, or toddlers toddling beside them, but what is mum doing? Studying her i-thingie or whatever is the latest gizmo in her hand.

Being ancient and of the opinion that mobile phones were originally just for making and receiving calls and texts, I honestly don't know what the hell she's looking at. Games? The Footsie? Emails? Online book? Surfing the web? Porn? All I know is that there's a little person that she's not interacting with in any way. No doubt this post will bring down the full wrath of Mumsnet on my head but honestly, small kids NEED interaction with their mothers or carers, not to be ignored because it's apparently more important to study some gizmo. Is it really SO important to never take your eyes of the damn thing that you pay your little one no attention whatsoever.

OK - bring on the condemnation. I have broad shoulders!

What about that absorbing gizmo (with a pedigree of a few thousand years) known as a good book?

My little person was often ignored because I had my nose in one of those. Now of course she has turned the tables.

My mother was the same.

I passed a colleague on the way to work the other day. She was navigating on auto-pilot with her attention firmly fixed on the volume in her hand.

Something should be done! It should have been done years ago! 2000? 3000?

LOL at "it's not good, ladies"! That's all you I-Thingy mums told! Naughty naughty! Clearly, the OP is a fucking wonderful parent.

Oh FGS. Interaction for the '70s dc was here's a sandwich, disappear for the day. Or actually no, make your own sandwich and disappear for the day. I agree witha previous poster, dc have never been given more attention in any other decade. When i'm on my "gizmo" it's because i've managed to wangle part-time working as long as I reply to customer emails. Which suits me fine. Alternatively I might be arranging something to do for my dc.

This is my last ever post on Mumsnet. I posted a few years back, a totally uncontroversial comment on how it was to give birth in the late 1960s. Should have learned my lesson then... my recent post was NOT about older kids who, yes, can often amuse themselves, but about tiny ones, including babies, where the mother is so occupied with that thingie in her hand, she is NOT interacting with her small kid in any way. And I'm not basing this on passing mothers thus occupied in the street, but observing them on bus and train journies, often quite long, and the kids trying hard to establish some eye contact with mummy.

But what do I know? People told me about Mumsnet and the perils of venturing there. Should have listened.

So what harm has it actually done you that people have disagreed with you? What harm does it do? You sound as if something bad had happened to you. Has it?

Oh dear. Op if you are a grandma you sound as though you've never really matured.

OK - bring on the condemnation. I have broad shoulders!

OP you come onto AIBU & invite people to disagree with you then flounce off because erm they disagree with you?

Come into Chat instead of aibu, its less bitey :)

Smart phones are used for more than just texting and games, I have my shopping list on mine for instance, so I am always glancing at it in the supermarket, and in a play area/park I check work documents too. I find using my phone as a way to access all information in one place (including for social things too) actually helps me save a lot of time, leaving me more time to interact with my kids in other moments.

Seriously?

Even with your massively broad shoulders and invitation to speak freely, you're going to chuck your toys out of the pram because some random people on the internet don't agree with you?

Pet. If we all did that, this place would be as dead as a dodo.

Are you one of those 'everyone's entitled to my opinion' types? Quick to be strident in their own opinion but trips over their lip if others don't pile in saying how much they agree?

Whatever.

I only came on here to look for the footsie. Where the heck is it?!

And i dont have an i-whatsit, just a samsung thingimybob

Don't worry OP, my toddlers have their own I-thingies for while I'm ignoring them. Bought them with my tax credits, I did.

ODFOD the 1950's is looking for you off ypu trot.

See, if you have seen me today in the surestart centre you'd have been disgusted by how long I was texting.

What you wouldn't have know is that I was texting my friend who had just found out she had breast cancer and was distraught.

Usually my phone doesn't leave my bag.

What Hecate said.

ODFOD.

I'm a single parent to an only child. We interact A LOT. We also travel by public transport a lot. When we do, DS (5) is usually quiet and content to look out of the window, people watch etc. So I take advantage of this to piss about on my smartphone. If he asks me a question or initiates a conversation, of course I would respond but if he fancies a bit of quiet contemplation, then I'm all for it. And no, I'm not looking at anything important, really, just catching up on emails, checking Facebook, reading Mumsnet but I don't think that every second of mine or DS's day needs to be filled with meaningful activity. It's not good for either of us!

Salmotrutta my mum uses her I-thingy to Facetime her grandchildren too, and DS loves to Facetime his cousins to show them things. Modern technology is wonderful!

blimey that was the quickest flounce EVER

ladies you are all horrible mother glued to your gizmos

'what about men'

i will ignore that and call you all ladies and bad mothers some more

'okay then'

FLOUNCE

rubbish OP - try harder

I think the OPs got a point TBH

my I-thingy keeps me sane.

I think OP might have a bit of a point too. There are mums (and dads) out there who are glued to their phones all the time. I was at a guided toddler group recently that was for single mums who need extra support socialising for whatever reason. The one request the group leader made was that we all kept our phones put away for the hour and really interacted with our children. Two mums couldn't even manage it for that one hour and just sat on a bench away from their children and the guided activity. The leader politely asked them again and they "mmm"ed at her and carried on. They just weren't arsed at all with getting involved (the whole point of the session).

Thanks, AmyFarrahFowlerCooper,for a bit of support. I was only posting about the (usually) mums of SMALL tots and BABIES - where the mother totally does NOT interact with the little one, being too busy on her gizmo. But of course, the harpies of Mumsnet totally slaughter me -no surprise there. Tiny ones NEED interaction with their carers, they shouldn't be ignored because mum to surfing the web or wheatever. Anyway, not bothering with Mumsnet any more - unpleasant crowd (not you, of course!)

Funny how you think calls and texts on a mobile are okay, the generation above you probably think none of its okay and the generation below you will think emails and twitter are okay. It couldn't possibly be that you are just entrenched by how YOU used phones and haven't moved with the times, and are using it as a vehicle to criticise parenting?