To not want to drive DP's family and friends back and forth to Heathrow?

[nicecupofteaandbiscuit]

We are getting married in a couple of weeks. DP's friends and family live abroad and are flying into Heathrow. This is the schedule:

Thursday: Best man arrives
Friday: BIL and SIL arrive
Saturday: MIL, FIL and GIL (Grandma-in-law) arrive
Sunday: Wedding
Tuesday: Best man leaves
Saturday: FIL and GIL leave
Friday: MIL leaves
Saturday: We go on honeymoon (from Heathrow!)

AIBU to not want to drive them all back and forth to Heathrow? We live about 1.5 hours drive away, but it will take more like 2-2.5 hours in the morning rush hour, which is when all their flights arrive/need to check-in for departure. Also, we will have to get up really early and I am not a morning person, and am unlikely to sleep well the few days before the wedding anyway. DP has the Thursday and Friday off work before the wedding, and I just have the Friday off.

On the other hand I feel like they are spending so much money to come to our wedding, that I should be more accommodating.

[Alibabaandthe40nappies]

Joining - did you miss the part where the OP said she was at work until the Friday?

OP - surely if your DP was going to do one trip then it should be to pick up his parents? The best man can make his own way, surely?

I'm really stunned tbh. We went to a wedding abroad last year and at no point did we consider it anyone's responsibility other than our own to get to the wedding location and back again. We hired a car, worked out the route, had a few mishaps with the foreign road signs but we got there.
If they are Americans then it isn't as if they don't speak the language!

[FriskyHenderson]

You are working and getting married. Driving 5 hours the day before your wedding when you don't have to is just daft.

[Gooseysgirl]

Plan A where you and DH were the taxi service would have been sheer and utter madness. Your new arrangements sound much more manageable. I would not expect to be collected, even if it was close family... especially when you live so far away from Heathrow. The last thing I had time for in the days before our wedding was being a taxi service. All our guests hired cars (airport 90 mins from venue) or were collected by our friends living locally who were delighted to help out. Like you OP I only finished work shortly before the wedding.

[Mumoftwoyoungkids]

Where are they flying from? Travelling in from Australia - you probably should pick them up. Or they may fall asleep on the train and end up in Edinburgh. Coming from Paris - not so much.

[SelfconfessedSpoonyFucker]

We travel from San Diego and have done so with two small children in years past and managed. My mother came with a car one time to Heathrow which was VERY nice, but other than that we've always got around under our own steam.

[Justforlaughs]

If my family were coming for a holiday I'd pick them up; if they were coming for my wedding I'd help arrange transport (public/ taxi); if my IL's were coming - they could walk
Sounds like you've got a more sensible solution sorted out now. If PILs aren't happy I suspect it will be more to do with the fact that DP is picking up best man and not them, but that's down to him.

[Thumbwitch]

I think you've got a good plan there, although the taxi for FIL/GIL will be very pricey and I think you might have to consider offering to pay for that.

In fact, if I were you, I'd send DP to collect his parents and grandmother and sod the best man - unless he has special needs, he can organise transport for himself! FIL/GIL to return by taxi - I think that's fair enough - but they really ought to be picked up by your DP.

[nicecupofteaandbiscuit]

The reason that DP would pick up best man but not PIL, is because PIL are arriving the day before the wedding. This means he'll have to get up at ~5.30am that day, and spend 4-5 hours driving. We have so much else to do that day. In the afternoon, we are putting on a buffet at our house so that our families can meet. We also need to take stuff over to the venue and decorate it, and anything else that needs doing.

So normally I would agree that DP should pick up PIL, and he would definitely do this if they were arriving any other day, but that day will be particularly busy.

[nicecupofteaandbiscuit]

Plus, although the taxi is pricey, I don't think it is that bad. If we give them £60 towards it (basically what we would have spent in petrol for two trips to the airport), then they only have £120 to pay. National Express would cost ~ £25 x 3 for trip from the airport (PIL and GIL) and £25 x 2 for return trip (FIL and GIL) = £125 total.

[Thumbwitch]

Ah yes, I see that logic. :)

[DIYapprentice]

Could you ask BIL/SIL to pick up PIL? Am assuming it is one of their parents. Just get them insured for 4 days on your car.

[DIYapprentice]

Or even the best man - after all he's supposed to do SOMETHING to help with the wedding!!!

[livinginwonderland]

Tell them to get the train!

[MistyB]

Could the best man do the airport pick ups on the following two days?

[eurozammo]

Can't one of them hire a car and then do the running about for you? Sounds like a job for the BM to me, and he is the first in!

For our wedding, we collected MIL from the airport (about 30 mins away) as she was coming alone, but left everyone else to it.

[EasterHoliday]

may I recommend Langley Station Cabs? they're about 15 mins from Heathrow - call them from baggage hall & then meet outside. They're FAR cheaper than taking an airport black cab and are totally reliable.