DH takes 20 mins every day to poo !

[pooquickly]

This 20 min poo thing happens every single day. DH disappears every morning into the loo with his reading material and says that's how long it takes. He says most of it is done within 2 mins but i was told to get everything out, it takes 20 mins ! It takes me 1 min. If i need to do more later, then i go and sit on the loo again! That's what i did this morning, and on my second sitting and i got a "what again?" from him (cos he wanted me to bring DD's book bag downstairs, rather than him walking his poor tired legs up the stairs).

I guess it annoys me, cos i spend all morning running around after the kids, trying to get them fed and ready, whilst he eats his brekkie, goes for 20 min dump and has time for shower. I have my shower night before (cos no time in morning unless i get up earlier), i eat breakfast somewhere between 9am - 10.30am and lucky if i get 2 mins in the loo!

I know he won't change his poo habit, but it annoys me.

AIBU ?

IF Dh took almost an hour to poo I'd insist he see a doctor.

Surprised at all these men who take a book/mag/laptop (!!) to poo with with.

I'd assume he was taking the piss (no pun intended... Though that wasn't a pun ) But serious, 45 minutes for a crap? Every day?

'Oh, it's time to do chores that requite juggling DC and acting quickly? Excuse me while I take my 30min-1hr long dump and you do all the chores. You know my body and crapping schedule...'

If DH having decides to do this (barring illness OFC) I'll just leave shared chores until he's ready.

Evil Helpful, understanding smile :)

YANBU. I seem to be the only non nappy wearing person in this house who can poo in under 5 minutes. Drives me mad. DS1 and DD have seemingly picked up the idea from DH that defecation is some sort of leisure activity.

I think adults being left to poo in peace is a marvellous idea.

If one is using it to get out of doing stuff though, that's not really on, is it?

In always know when DH needs a poo, he wanders about gathering magazines, books etc.
He then disappears for 10-20 mins.

The gathering up of reading material is a sure sign of male pre poo behaviour though.

Never thought of the pelvic floor thing before but why it takes so many man ages to poo has always puzzled me.

Man thing for sure - My DP poops as a recreational activity 'bit bored? I will go poo'..not sure what to say to Queenie? Time for a poo..don't fancy that job?..and so on

Also enjoys telling me about each one

I've always thought that men are obsessed by their bowels and their performances. I put it down to not being able to give birth.

If he wants to take 20 mins during one of the busiest times of day to escape (because that's what he's doing), fine. Each person has the right to toilet in a way they best see fit.

Provided you get the same amount of time to escape as well.

I suspect if you decided you wanted 20 minutes to yourself at bedtime, leaving him in no uncertainty that it was his responsibility to put the DC to bed while you did it, his 20-minute poos would suddenly become a lot shorter.

Im a man. I take around 10-15 mins. I like to take my time, have a read, make sure there is a complete evacuation, so to speak.