Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DH takes 20 mins every day to poo !

83 replies

pooquickly · 12/07/2013 11:48

This 20 min poo thing happens every single day. DH disappears every morning into the loo with his reading material and says that's how long it takes. He says most of it is done within 2 mins but i was told to get everything out, it takes 20 mins ! It takes me 1 min. If i need to do more later, then i go and sit on the loo again! That's what i did this morning, and on my second sitting and i got a "what again?" from him (cos he wanted me to bring DD's book bag downstairs, rather than him walking his poor tired legs up the stairs).

I guess it annoys me, cos i spend all morning running around after the kids, trying to get them fed and ready, whilst he eats his brekkie, goes for 20 min dump and has time for shower. I have my shower night before (cos no time in morning unless i get up earlier), i eat breakfast somewhere between 9am - 10.30am and lucky if i get 2 mins in the loo!

I know he won't change his poo habit, but it annoys me.

AIBU ?

OP posts:
BadLad · 12/07/2013 13:22

It was a Japanese doctor - I suspect the English version was done with a dictionary, or babelfish.

He even gave me the picture of the inside to take away!

Original poster
pooquickly · 12/07/2013 13:26

No blood no.

OP posts:
Sunnysummer · 12/07/2013 13:35

YANBU. DH takes up to 30 minutes - and I wouldn't care, except that we only have one bathroom plus it always seems to happen at the busiest time of morning and whenever dinner has to be prepared/cleared!

I'm going to take i'mTooHecsy's excellent suggestion, and say that he should see what happens if he can't take in anything to read and do. Either it'll work and I'll have bathroom access and a helping hand, or it will fail and I'll hook him an appointment with the doctor Smile

eddiemairswife · 12/07/2013 13:36

My ex- husband and eldest son are the same. Tell you where they are going and why; comments afterward such as, "Don't go in there for a while," or "That's better, I feel a lot lighter." I don't ever remember my father and uncles behaving like this. It must be the consequence of the 'Swinging Sixties'.

Burmillababe · 12/07/2013 13:39

There were a few lads at my old job who used to go for several 20 minute craps every day! And it was fairly clear that it wasnt a skive - the gents loo was next to the ladies! In between times they would sit at their desks and fart! It was RANK! Grin

HeffalumpTheFlump · 12/07/2013 13:41

Sorry I completely agree with the other posters, he's just doing it to have a nice stress free morning. A friend of mine used to spend half an hour each time in the loo and he confessed it was so he could have a break from his gf (now ex) and their dd. Unless there is a health problem, no one needs this long to poo! Funnily enough, friends ex gf suddenly became someone who had to sit and contemplate... I suggest you do the same at another time in the day when you need a break!!

Burmillababe · 12/07/2013 13:44

Oh yes and as some of the PPs have mentioned, they used to announce it (comments about turtle's head etc) and sometimes take photos of it to send to each other (and to me, aapparently because I was 'one of the boys'! They were aged 21-27 so not even teens!

NatashaBee · 12/07/2013 13:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Soontobemama · 12/07/2013 13:50

My DH does this and it drives me mad. I am always telling him that it's not normal and he must see the DR for constipation if it really takes him so long to go.

Booboostoo · 12/07/2013 13:57

Join the long line of Crap Widows. I have to poo in mili-seconds, with the door open so the toddler can come pester me because he is too busy to help, but as soon as it is his turn to take her he gets an irresistible urge for a half hour crap.

ChunkyPickle · 12/07/2013 14:04

Another here - I have to give him a 20 minute warning after he (pre kids) used to spend 45 minutes in there and gave himself piles (and numb legs)

I on the other hand get followed in by the toddler, and if I'm really unlucky, the toddler and a torch....

themilkmonster · 12/07/2013 14:07

My DH sits on the loo with his phone for up to half an hour every morning before work and then again when he gets home. Drives me bonkers. Really pisses me off when I'm busy doing something and he'll hand me the baby so he can go for a poo, how does he think I manage it- I've even pooed with the baby sitting on my knee a few times! YANBU!

thebody · 12/07/2013 14:10

Yep I live with 3 adult males, dh and dss and all of them take ages and read.

Me and dds just do it and leave.

CrisisCritical · 12/07/2013 14:11

thebody I'm surprised your bathroom is ever bloody free!

UC · 12/07/2013 14:16

This thread has made me laugh out loud.

My DP does a poo same time every day too, usually about 20 minutes too, also takes his tablet with him to read the paper. It always coincides with that period after dinner when the table needs wiping, dishwasher loading, etc etc. His sons are the same, but different times of day (thank goodness since there aren't enough loos). My sons are like me - go when you need to, spend 5 minutes max.

Kikithecat · 12/07/2013 14:18

Hah! Today I painted a wall, came downstairs for a quick snack, surfed the web, went back and gave the wall a 2nd coat ALL while DP was still in the loo.

poopyisapig · 12/07/2013 14:19

My ex h used to do that, sometimes for half an hour.

When I met now DH, I was aghast that he went in, did his business and came straight out.

I remember the first shit he had when we first moved in (romantic, me Grin) he said he was off to the loo, so I went to settle in with a book while he was gone. He can out in two mins and I was shocked.

poopyisapig · 12/07/2013 14:19

My ds takes after his father though, always has a red loo ring on his bum/legs after he's finished. He was in there for 40 mins reading the other day.

CrisisCritical · 12/07/2013 14:29

When DP was a child, his dad used to poo everyday for about 30 minutes when he got home from work. One by one the kids (3 of them) would be summoned to be told off for various misadventures. All whilst their dad was pooing.

DP and his siblings called it, and still do call it, the toilet bollocking.

Original poster
pooquickly · 12/07/2013 15:55

Kikithecat i just lol and read that out to my mum.

OP posts:
mirai · 16/07/2013 10:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

diddl · 16/07/2013 11:07

My husband also takes a while.

I think he also goes before he needs to iyswim.

I think being at home with the kids & you tend to leave it pretty last minute-& do it as quickly as possible!

He's used to being able to take his time having lived alone & in a job where he can go to the bathroom &when & for as long as he likes.

I sometimes take my time when I can though & remember my mum being the same.

We always used to say that she was in the "library"!

Are we odd in that we have reading material in the bathroom??

Lazyjaney · 16/07/2013 11:26

"Comes to something when you can't even have a poo without being timed"

Fakebook · 16/07/2013 11:27

He's an adult, let him poo in peace fgs, stop timing him.

Lazyjaney · 16/07/2013 11:28

Women usually take far longer to bath/shower/get ready for bed etc etc - swings and roundabouts.

Swipe left for the next trending thread