Ive had times in my life when I have been poor (as a child, mid 20s) and other times (now) when Im comparably well off
As a child I bumbled on happily like only a child can because my parents made sure we had a routine, full bellies, warm clothes and beds and to some degree were protected from their stresses. My mother always put aside a small sum so we could get books as we had no TV and the library (rural area) was a 24 mile round trip, I played outside with siblings and was happy, mother cooked every day and did some sewing as a (literal) cottage industry. Sounds idyllic, yes?
I didn't realise that my mother was seriously stressed, depressed and agoraphobic, and to be honest as a child never even wondered why she didn't speak or leave the house. I didn't realise how poorly off we were, didn't realise then that the euphemistic hop-hop, squawk-squawk and Bambi (rabbit, pheasant and venison) we were eating was either poached or roadkill (it allowed my parents to spend more on vegetables etc), or that my dads night fishing trips were of dubious legality. The house was a nightmare to heat off an open fire, the floors were uncarpeted concrete, at periods 4 of us were in one room, we used to be so proud if we could collect cones and wood for the fire because it saved using coal, and my father commuted a round trip of 80 miles plus to go to a physical job of heavy work because it was the only work around, before he set up his own business. And we used to clean t'road with our tongues.....
In my 20s (ahem some years ago) I was in my mothers position in a way though thankfully as a student with no young children to feed, but with a fiver to last each week for food, and general nitpicky negotiation of the bills with gas/electric suppliers every month, could deal with bailiffs at the door, walked ridiculous distances to low paid jobs at stupid o'clock in the morning in a depressed haze each day then tried to get to lectures and study, collapsing into bed at 7pm in a damp room with the laundry drying because I couldn't face cooking another bland sludge-meal, eking out the boots value shampoo to make it last another few days, stealing toilet paper from the uni loos! watching other students take on internships and voluntary work and interesting projects knowing I couldnt do anything that wasnt paid. Like being on a diet, the constant equationof food, time and money burning in your mind, I used to make long lists and plans as I walked everywhere, trying to contrive. And it was hard, and I dug deep to get a good degree and then further vocational work, and am now many years away from those days.
This isnt a stealth boast -(its great, I got on my bike and you can do it too!
) , this is a plea for those (like celebrity chefs and the posters here who think its all about extra lentils) its not, its about long term poverty, powerlessness and the trap of cheap shoes and not having any control over things or the feeling that it could ever get better. Its about poverty of choices and aspirations. Its about the million petty ways you got screwed over for more money because choices were limited eg metered electricity, bank charges, expensive local shops because the supermarket was less accessible, and a single unforeseen event or rise in gas costs could have you living on noodles and pepper for the week.
I got out and I know why - because despite the low income as a child I was brought up in a stable way, with middle-class aspirations and encouraged in education, because I was bright, articulate and had a certain self confidence even at my lowest ebb, because despite the grinding poverty and depression of those few years, I always had a goal, an ending, the idea that my education would allow me to move on, because I had a lot of the extra life skills (budgeting, cooking, mending etc that my upbringing had given me) and because I had no issues with drink or drugs. I don't know how Id have fared if Id had a less stable upbringing, less life skills and no modeling of reasonably emotionally healthy adult behavior, if I hadn't been encouraged and successful at school, if I had had literacy or numeracy issues or struggled to communicate, if I knew those years were going to be the rest of my life, with added issues such as physical ill health, disability, mental health issues or responsibility for children or elderly parents thrown in. I dont know how id cope if I ever ended up back in that situation
Im lucky and will not forget that.
I am with the posters who think we should be outraged that people are having to make the choice between food and heat, that people are still stuck in the same poverty traps and that the gap between our richest and poorest are still widening and will widen further, that we have hundreds of people chasing fixed contract, part time jobs, that our social contract and support for the most vulnerable is being dismantled and sold off to private concerns and charity and volunteering is meant to make up the gap, that further education is rapidly becoming for the richest only, that housing and childcare is prohibitively expensive, and that we are all apparently in this together!
Im most outraged that we have an apathetic disengaged electorate, semi-educated by the pap fed to them by a politicised press, and a professional political class so removed from the reality of the average persons life that they cannot empathise with the reality of being poor, and that we as a nation seem to be buying their narratives.
That turned into a long rant. If you read it all, thanks!