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AIBU?

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Original poster

to go to the police? ex got hold of bank details

21 replies

wonderingsoul · 03/07/2013 12:10

iv posted before about my ex cunbt pf a husband, we are in court in july for child support, he is in america and refuses to go.

i had to email him today to get prove that he woudlnt show up, so i had to unblock him and remind him of the court date for him to show up. which i got. " im not showing you will get dick from me"

followed by aload more abuse, then i got an email of details of my banks acounts. two of them. with the "your turn" written under the details.

he is again blocked, and i wish i didnt have to unblock him in the first place but my soliciotr said the more prove of him refusing the better.
if i am honest i am alittle shaken by this.

i have no idea how he got the details, or if he has the sort code etc.. but i know he is trying to intimdate me. he is not named on any of them so had no right to them

would i be wrong to go to the police about this? would they care, could they do anything. who do i show this to?

OP posts:
NatashaBee · 03/07/2013 12:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SignoraStronza · 03/07/2013 12:14

Yes, go to the police. As an aside, once this is all sorted and he is still in the states, I believe the laws over there mean that every time he fails to make a maintenance payment he'll automatically be carted off to jailGrin

sleepyhead · 03/07/2013 12:15

Is there anything he can do with the bank details? I don't think it matters if he's got the account numbers and sort codes.

If he's intimidating you then it might be worth while flagging it to the police, but I'm not sure what they can do if he's in the US.

Original poster
wonderingsoul · 03/07/2013 12:17

we are in court on the 16th for this natashabee i have never written hima check. my mind is boggling. i have kept all of his emails.

signorastronza i know i should, but that does make me smile. i know i will have to go back to court to h ave it taken from his pay, but i do hope he gets a little time inside for the 4 years hes ignored and refused to pay child support

my first thought was the police, but then i thought he hasnt said he going to do anything with them, and hes inanother country. what really can they do?

OP posts:
Original poster
wonderingsoul · 03/07/2013 12:18

*shouldnt

OP posts:
AnythingNotEverything · 03/07/2013 12:21

What details does he have?

Original poster
wonderingsoul · 03/07/2013 12:25

the bank acount number, but i dont know if he has the sort code etc,

i also dont get why is he showing them to me.. maybe he just couldnt contain himself.
also where did he them from.

one of the account is one that i had when i was married to him, he s name wassnt on it, but he has a card for it, but pincode have been changed since we split.

the second is a new account that i set up about 2 years ago.

how has he got them, is what im really worried about.

OP posts:
AnythingNotEverything · 03/07/2013 12:28

Do you feel threatened by the emails? Or harassed?

He can't do anything with your account number or sort code. If he still has a card he could pay for things online though, I think.

DorisIsWaiting · 03/07/2013 12:29

I think I would be looking for a new bank account again. It seems the route with the least worry. Is there any chance he has had access to your pc to install any kind of malware?

Are the accounts with the same bank? if you have online access both accounts would be shown.

When changing your accounts make sure you change the passwords to ones he couldn't guess.

Tiredmumno1 · 03/07/2013 12:30

Would it be a bad idea to ask him where he got them details? Then whatever response you get is more evidence. Maybe you could call the police to see if they will log it?

I am sorry that probably didn't help, but he sounds awful tbh.

Thanks
Original poster
wonderingsoul · 03/07/2013 12:33

i do feel threatended if im honest. anything from him makes me anxiouse and i knew i would get abuse from him soon as i asked if he was going to show up on the 16th.

but him showing me the account details, its like hes threatening me with things he could do. though i know he cant really do anything with just the numbers, but i dont knwo if he has any other info. considering i dont knwo how he got the deatils, esp the second account he could have anything really? he could have set credit cards etc in my name anything.

OP posts:
Original poster
wonderingsoul · 03/07/2013 12:36

doris he is in america so i dont think so, new bank account sounds liek a good diea. just so much hassel aswell. Sad

tired no, theres no point, he would just get off on seeing me question him, he'd see it as a one up on him
thank you for the flowers though. i was shaking when i read the email but iv clamed down now and soon going to go paint the kids room, get my anger out in a positive way lol.

OP posts:
xylem8 · 03/07/2013 12:40

There is nothing secret about a bank account number! What harm do you imagine he can do with it.What are you expecting the police to do?

Original poster
wonderingsoul · 03/07/2013 12:42

well there is if he lives in another country and you have no idea where or how he got it. xylem are you saying that if an abusive ex emailed you your detaisl that wouldnt put you on edge?

OP posts:
Original poster
wonderingsoul · 03/07/2013 12:42

oh and read the the whole post.

OP posts:
FrequentFlyerRandomDent · 03/07/2013 12:58

Call 101 for advice at least. I would call my bank too to explain the situation.

I remember Clarkson eating humble pie after he published his bank account and sort code details in his newslaper column to prove that nothing criminal could be done with this info and that people were paranoid silly what-nots.

Someone duly set up a direct debit (to a charity, as it was only to prove the counter point) from his account.

JackieTheFart · 03/07/2013 13:12

Call your bank and ask them to check active cards on your account. If he once had a card in his name on your account he must have had third party access - check he hasn't still got that or he will be able to access your accounts.

He won't be able to do anything otherwise, unless he is very persuasive and can get a woman to impersonate you over the phone. Data protection is very good, bank staff can be fined or fired (no limits to the fine) for divulging information IIRC.

JackieTheFart · 03/07/2013 13:13

Although FrequentFlyer is right - with just sort code and account DDs can be set up. He doesn't sound like he has the smarts for that though!

xylem8 · 03/07/2013 13:16

re Clarkson
..and under the direct debit guarantee scheme he would have got a full immediate refund.

Original poster
wonderingsoul · 03/07/2013 13:22

xylem does that make it better then? long as they get the money back its all dandy.

i will go down to the bank after school pick up. he does have a girlfriend who would pretend to be me.. but i think that a bit far fetched for him.. i think.. hope..

OP posts:
LouiseSmith · 03/07/2013 17:29

Contact your bank ask them to change your account number, sort codes are easy to get hold of, if you bank at the same branch of the same bank you will have the same sort code.

Call the police, and leave him blocked!

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