To feel sad to see 5 year old girl in hijab

[INeedSomeSun]

Probably will get flamed for this & iabu as its not my business.
I am not racist in any way. I am Asian myself and have many Muslim friends.

Growing up, I never saw any muslim girls with hijabs. This is a trend which has been growing since the late 90s.

I know that the meaning behind the hijab is to protect modesty and show committment to Islam. It is supposed to be the girls/womans decision after much thought and dedication.

At 5 years old they are still getting changed in the classroom for PE and she won't be able to do this now with boys around. How will she play and do PE freely? She has been singled out by the views of her parents.
Also, she will barely know what religion means, so she has not made an informed decision for herself.

Normally she is chasing about with my DS and other kids before school.Today she was just stood there, perhaps embarrassed or told not to?
I felt very sad

darker skin has more difficulty in absorbing Vitamin D, also our summers have for the last few years been really really crap, Vitamin D can be found in foods as well, I dont think you can actually absorb enough vitamin D from the sun for the amount of sun we get here, almost non at all today for example.

My GP told me that about the sun Vitamin D absorption.

Also when I was born my mum was automatically perscribed vitamin drops for me and herself that was stopped too, dunno how much of that would have a knock on effect now.

yes, me and my children all have vitamin d. We dont wear burquas. or headscarves

application of sunscreen is contributing to vitamin d deficiency also

I think the issue with Vitamin D deficiency is not just as simple as burqa wearing. My SIL all wear the hijab and one wears the niqab as well. But they live in a hot country and have outside space at home where they wear normal clothes usually a short sleeved dress. The problem is where people live in a country like the UK with low levels of sunshine and lack access to a garden. So wearing a burqa if you live in a flat in Newcastle may be an issue for Vit D but not if you live in a house in North Africa like my SIL.

I'm really sorry to hear about the DV, fuzzy. I don't understand your point though. Would the Islamic court also have given you sole care of your kids while your ex denied any wrongdoing, without a trial or hearing?

wearing a burqua is no different in terms of vitamin d, than wearing trouses and a long sleeved top...either to keep you warm, or protect against the sun. Especially if you slather on the suncream a well

Boomba - when did we start discussing the application of suncream?
We didn't so don't try to side-step what we are discussing.

Morris I was granted full custody of my children, they accepted what they heard and my children could also relate what had happened so they were all completely accepted. Ex pretty much made his own bed when he tried to have my uncle beaten up by thugs, that was proof enough that he was a danger.

Islamic laws regarding custody is firstly how fit the parents are to care for the children, then the children get to decide where they want to live if both parents are fit to care for the children but cannot agree.

If ex was not a danger to my children I would not hesitate in agreeing to shared residency.

Islamically children have a right to know their roots and by that their father.

I am firecly protective of my chidlren because of what I've gone thro, I would not force my chidlren to do anything they did not want. I feel girls especailly need to have their wises feelings and personal boundaries respected.

my point is nobody accused me of lying for not having left him when the violence started, they accepted what they heard and the police cautions and the fact that I had bruises which people had seen and third party witness statements as to what ex said about me.
At no point was I accused of lying for not leaving.

Boomba - don't start trading insults, it demeans you and the discussion.

Boomba
Your hands and face are uncovered in a long sleeve top and trousers. Quite a few burqa wearers wear gloves as well.

One of my SIL wears the haik but she has private outdoor space where she can uncover.

DH mentioned something to me about sun exposure and rickets the other day, probably as we live in Canada, and the winters are very long, dull, and we hardly get outside. So I looked up what he told me, and found the NHS say the same. Diet plays a part, and 10-15mins exposure to sun in spring and summer, a FEW times a week, on HANDS and FACE is enough.

Rickets Prevention

I don't have anything to say about what other people dress their children in as it's not my business.

Maybe she was copying her mum, maybe she wanted to try it out, maybe as it's Ramadan the family are more strict for this month and after it's finished it will come off. Many, many reasons. The only way to find out for sure, is to talk to her mum.

LastTango, wearing sunscreen is a factor in the growing case of ricketts.

I was told by my GP when pg that I was fine, my children are OK I have a Vit D deficiency but it has been developed very recently and is knock on affect of other illnesses I've had. Not wearing the headscarf.

I think most people forget that Muslim women dont cover in the privacy of their own home and they can get sunlight on their skin from sitting in their own back gardens.

You've been amazingly strong fuzzy. I have no experience of courts, divorce etc but I do feel that the adversarial system, flawed as it is, is as good as a legal system gets.

Presumably the people who accused yiu of lying were advocating on behalf of your ex. It's horrible that people have to go through this kind of ordeal, but at the same time its hard to see how justice can be done otherwise.

If your ex was accusing you of lying then as vile as he is, he deserves his say and his representation too. I'm glad you are rid of him now.

fuzzy - I am aware that wearing suncreen is a factor in the growing case of ricketts - it's just that this thread is a bit like 'chinese whispers' and we weren't discussing suncreen application !

It wasn't the being accused of lying, thats fine, it was being laughed at and told as I was intelligent that I would have left if I was suffering from DV. That shocked me as surely the statistics for DV show a completely different story.

Also the fact that the judge found completely in my favour regarding the DV and the hcidlren having witnessed it, yet still gave him contact.

I had to fight to protect my young vluerable and terrified children.

My stance in these cases would be if the father is found to have been abusive the children are not safe in his care.

It has been emotionally draining and financially crippling but I can't not fight my childrens corner in this, I firmly believe he would not hesitate to cause them personal harm, or put them in harms away if he ever gets the opportunity.

LastTango, I think Boomba meant that sunscreen plays a part in the increasing case of ricketts, also for women weairng a headscarf the amount they leave uncovered is enough to absorb the amount of Vit D from sunlight, however a good diet is also needed in combination to prevent ricketts.
So the statistics aren't reflecting the number of women wearing burkhas rather a combination of all the above, lack of sunlight full stop, poor diets, and increased use of sunscreen.

The NHS has recommended Vitamin D for all children under 5s and pregnant women for decades, it was even around pre-NHS (it's even there in old WW2 health leaflets). It's not new in the slightest, just a new campaign to get the information out there.

I wear cloth caps for purely personal reasons: I just feel more comfortable with it and enjoy how it looks. I started wearing them as an adult, my family thought it odd at first with no religious or cultural connection or illness, but it suits me. My DD1 likes to wear them sometimes and is very careful when wearing them, as she thinks they're very special and grown-up. My cloth cap keeps my long hair out of the way so I can do more.

Coming from a culture which suffered through forced haircuts and clothing removal and changing children's appearances to save them (and much more), the idea of banning clothes because they aren't "right" comes across as downright imperialistic. The underlying issue of inequality can be faced and challenged without denying cultural differences (Hijabs existed in many of areas pre-Islam and head coverings can be seen in cultures globally for religious and secular reasons).

Many within Muslim cultures are working towards that equality already, and Britain has enough problems in it's media representation and education that perpetuates inequality and pushes the focus for change on "saving" others rather than focusing on those still oppressing us all.

See, I just don't get why it has to be either/ or. I'm very concerned about women's issues wherever I see them. I'm a feminist to my bones. I'm pissed off by pinkification. I'm aghast at sexually exploitative pop videos etc. I abhor all forms of DV, or other domestic abuse. And I hate seeing girls and women covering themselves up beyond conventional dress standards in order to stop the male gaze.

Surely the same people will, by definition, be concerned about a range of limitations on women's freedoms, rather than thinking that one type cancels out the other?

It makes no logical sense.

Last Tango I agree with your posts and Fuzzy I can't imagine anyone having anything but the upmost respect for you. How dreadful.

The op was about little girls covering up and I agree with her. I am sad for any child has to dress a certain way to satisfy a religion or custom but especially sad as this often restricts girls more than boys.

I still maintain that I simply cannot believe that a whole nation/ culture of women, if thru really really had a choice, would pick thick all enveloping black robes to wear with holes for eyes, gloves and a mouth slit.

I simply don't believe that's their choice to make and there are men making them do this.

AL religions are male dominated, mysygonistic, controlling and restrictive and you bet that somebody somewhere is making the money and it sure wont be AWOMAN.

The OP is making huge assumptions we dont have facts.

All I can tell you categorically is that young children aren't expected to adhere to clothing rules in Islam.

Also there is a massive industry in abayas and burkhas, what you see as one black sheet with eye slits is in actual fact seasonally changing outerwear in a thousand different colurs, cuts, materials with a load more accessories.

It's a very lucrative industry is abayas and headscarves.

You'd be amazed I think.

fuzzy - I am sure it is a very lucrative industry........but I wonder how many of the entrepreneurs are women?

I am really sad to see any girl or woman of any age in 2013 having to cover her head up.

All the places I buy my headscarves from are women who own their own businesses.

The main designers for designer abayas are women (the expensive couture ones that I am familiar with at least), there's a French muslim woman with her own abaya boutique with her own designs (also super expensive).

I usually design my own ones and send the design with my mum to india and she brings back what I want (with her own embellishment added much to my despair).

Yanbu at all, I recently saw a girl in a buggy, could not hav been rpmore than 3 in one . As if men will be tempted by a baby in a buggy fgs!

do you actually know any Muslim women tango?