You're a shit mother. Come back from that or not bother?

[Samuelleo]

Just that really.

Who is saying it?

Very much depends on that....

what?

Are you calling me a shit mother? Is that unreasonable?

What's your question?

My partner, in a bad temper. Apologised straightaway.

for no reason??

I'd kill him

My ex said it often to me. We didn't split over it, but I hated him for it and never really forgave him. I still feel angry about it now when I think it.

In what context? I can only assume you'd given your kids used needles to play with or forgotten to bring a baby home from Glastonbury?

I doubt you're a shit mother, I really do.

Not for "no" reason, we're bth tired and stressed. But I didn't call him a shit father.

That is quite an insult. Can't be many worse, for mothers.

Well, if it wasn't for no reason, what reason was there for his comment?

Maybe this is a "walk around the park and all will be well" one.. I didn't like the shit mother thing.

And what examples did he give of you being a shit mother? I also doubt it. But it's a known way to make someone feel guilty. Not a nice thing to do either.

I think you need to give more context to get a clear answer on 'come back from or not bother'.

Walk sweetheart, it's known as emotional abuse but maybe not the best person to listen to

That'd break me. If I was already on edge, I'd boil over. Nope. Wouldn't forgive.

To be fair, this is a shock, he's usually (14 years) lovely. You're a shit mother though???

I was going to say "ignore". Then I saw it was your DH.

From DH, I would go mental. Absolutely mental.

If he is usually lovely, then a lot of talking might get you there. Probably some counselling.

This would be a really big deal to me.

what makes him think that??

I wouldnt be very happy about it If I thought i was a really good mum

Surely being a mother is the most important thing anyone can ever do, my stbxh used to say the same. Out of all his insults and abuse, it is the one thing that I still dwell on

It's quite a big deal for me, but I'm feeling much more inclined to forgive now; he said he "spoke in anger" and didn't mean it.

You still haven't explained what happened for him to say that.

right, and calling you children's mother a shit mother doesn't really make you father of the year, now does it.

he is only accusing you of being a shit mother... whilst demonstrating perfectly that he is a shit father.

He said he didn't mean it he knew that would hurt me in the heat of the row.