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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be annoyed by all parents of 16-18yos

68 replies

MortifiedAdams · 27/06/2013 13:31

Who insist on calling up their DCs place of work / potential place of work to do the following:

*Ask about job vacancies
*Ask how to apply for jobs, what the pay is, hours and holiday
*Ask how their dc did at interview / when their dc will hear back from HR
*Ask how their dc will get to work in the snow / on the bus etc
*Ring in sick for their dc
*Call in to speak to management about shifts, hours worked etc

IN short, everything a person actually IN (or applying for) the job should be doing.

Part of working is being responsible for doung this not having Mum and Dad doing it for you. And I dont even work in HR, must be worse for them!!

OP posts:

Myliferocks · 27/06/2013 13:32

I have a 17 year old and I have never done that.
I'm evil and make her do it!

ChippingInWiredOnCoffee · 27/06/2013 13:33

I don't mind at all.

It narrows down the applicants quite nicely

Gunznroses · 27/06/2013 13:35

I agree with everything except 'ringing in sick for their dc' if dc is sick what's wrong with parents or friend whatever ringing in on their behalf?

ilovexmastime · 27/06/2013 13:35

That's just weird, isn't it? I had a part time job from 14 onwards and my parents never got involved, in fact I'd probably have died of embarrassment if they had.

Remotecontrolduck · 27/06/2013 13:36

Do people actually do this?? Really??

Is it common? DD is 19 and would think I was insane if I tried that!

londongirlatheart · 27/06/2013 13:37

I have an 18 year old. In two years I have rung work once for her (she was struggling to keep out of bathroom long enough to ring in herself!). Always had to ring college as college expected the parents to - showed absence was legit.

lurkedtoolong · 27/06/2013 13:37

I can't understand why parents do this - except when someone is genuinely too poorly to call in sick. Or as my mum did for me - called in sick when I had the opportunity to go to Paris for the weekend but had one shift in a supermarket to do.

Crinkle77 · 27/06/2013 13:38

YANBU. there are people like this who i work with and always wonder why they are interfering. When I was a teenager my mum would make me contact people and find info out for ourselves. I hated it and would ask her to do it but she would refuse saying i had to learn to do things myself. i thought she was being mean but now i can see that she was teaching me to be independent.

FudgeyCookie · 27/06/2013 13:38

My mums rung in sick for me a couple of times, once I had tonsillitis and had no voice so couldn't speak, and the second time I was huggin the toilet and couldn't. I think in those circumstances it's acceptable.

My mums actually for me both of my jobs - both bosses were talking to her about maybe employing new staff, my mum suggested me, I got casually interviewed as they knew me already and got the job both times. She would never call somewhere for me though, to ask for any vacancies, pay etc

Remotecontrolduck · 27/06/2013 13:39

Obviously when too sick to actually do it it's clearly reasonable!

londongirlatheart · 27/06/2013 13:40

Gunz - always think that if they ring in sick themselves with a cold etc at least work can hear how ill the sounds.

kotinka · 27/06/2013 13:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HongkongDreamer · 27/06/2013 13:42

My mum called in and told somehwere I quit cause of how they were treating me, glad she did looking back on it. Was 17 at the time.

kotinka · 27/06/2013 13:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OneStepCloser · 27/06/2013 13:45

No, I have never done this, dd got her job by walking round and giving her CV into every shop she saw and it paid off. I d never ring for her, all part of the adjustment period for her I believe from child to adult. (obvioulsy is she was too ill to ring herself, I would)

But, I do know parents who would.

KirjavaTheCat · 27/06/2013 13:47

I worked with a 17 year old girl whose parents put in her CV, drove her to the interview, chased up the interview, chased up the interview again, got no response... Then, came into the shop in person and complained that they'd had no response when chasing up the interview. Then when she got the job (to shut them up), they phoned up to arrange everything for her to start.

She was a really down-to-earth, lovely girl who seemed really embarrassed about being famous for the girl who got the job because her parents were pushy arseholes.

Not always the teenager's fault!

Gunznroses · 27/06/2013 13:53

londongirl- I don't think its for work to determine how ill someone sounds, they've just got to take it on trust, though I do see you point.

Kotinka - Precisely why there's always a 'croaky' sounding voice when the sick call is made . Croaky doesnt always equal sick, sometimes its just that...a 'croaky' sounding voice. I do a really good one by the way

AmyFarrahFowlerCooper · 27/06/2013 13:56

I used to beg my mum to phone in sick for me but she always refused because she HATED it when teenagers used to get their parents to ring in sick to her.

solarbright · 27/06/2013 13:57

I have never been so ill with a vomiting bug that I could not make a 2-minute phone call to my employer - and I've had some severe bugs. Unless you are unconcious or have lost the ability to speak (in which case, text or email), you need to make the call yourself. It does look bad if mum/partner/friend calls instead.

WitchOfEndor · 27/06/2013 14:02

My DAunt does this for my DNephew. She also makes his sandwiches, washes and irons his clothes and is worried about what will happen when she and DUncle are dead because DNephew will have to cope with running a house on his own. He is 29. She is 60 this year so in all likelyhood he will be in his 40s ( and probably still at home) when this happens.

She can't see that she is doing him no favours at all.

StuntGirl · 27/06/2013 14:03

I agree with everything except 'ringing in sick for their dc' if dc is sick what's wrong with parents or friend whatever ringing in on their behalf?

It's often in your contract or employee handbook that you must personally call in yourself.

Original poster

MortifiedAdams · 27/06/2013 14:04

I took a call this morning:

"Hi Im calling to see if you take on Students over the summer"
"Yes, we have a selection of jobs avaliable on our website, and applications can be made there. We have casual contracts and permanent ones"
"Yes but do you take students on for the summer?"
"Yes. We take all applications into consideration. If yiu go.onto the website you can apply from there"
"Oh right, I will have a look for my son tonight"

«phone down...bangs head on desk»

OP posts:

teenagetantrums · 27/06/2013 14:05

I would never do any of these things for my teenagers, as long as they are not in hospital they can phone in for themselves, the most I have done is check their C.V and print it off for them.

Gunznroses · 27/06/2013 14:34

Stuntgirl - I know, but that's why I'm querying it. Taking solarbrights point, there are may different types of illnesses that may prevent you from ringing in personally, i don't see why having the sick bug would prevent you from ringing, as you said, it only takes a minute and you dont usually continue being sick without a break. However i have had period pain where i was screaming for help and rolling on the floor, there was no way i could ring in personally, or when i lost my voice for 3 days, or when i had malaria, or when my bf got hit in the jaw with a hockey stick etc

I think where possible you should ring in personally but if you've been up in pain all night and have finally managed to fall asleep at 6am or in such a condition such as to render you incapable of ringing i don't think its unreasonable for someone to ring in on your behalf and don't see why it should be frowned upon.

samandi · 27/06/2013 14:39

WTAF?

How utterly bizarre.

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