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AIBU?

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Original poster

Jeremy Forrest verdict - aibu to be confused?

999 replies

noddyboulder · 20/06/2013 14:54

Yep, I don't think even his own parents could deny he's a massive, hideous scumbag with no impulse control - but how can he have been found guilty of abduction when the girl he had an affair with said it was her idea to go to France and she went willingly?

Can somebody legal shed some light?

OP posts:
DuelingFanjo · 21/06/2013 13:29

"If you read the link just posted others convicted of having sex with a pupil each got less than 18 months so why give him 5 and a half years?" because he was found guilty of child abduction and sex with a child?

cantspel · 21/06/2013 13:33

but he only got 1 year for the abduction and 5 and a half years for the sex both sentances to run concurrently so a total of five and a half years.

DuelingFanjo · 21/06/2013 13:33

Are his family trying to blame his actions on other people not acting on their suspicions earlier?

MrsDeVere · 21/06/2013 13:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DuelingFanjo · 21/06/2013 13:38

this is the story of the other teacher (upply) from the same school. Not such a 'romantic' story.

RikeBider · 21/06/2013 13:38

What view do some posters take of men that they think "whoops, I shagged a school girl" is somehow understandable??

StuntGirl · 21/06/2013 13:39

Boggles the mind doesn't it Rike?

Dawndonna · 21/06/2013 13:40

More weak and lacking in common sense. Why are you excusing his bad behaviour? What inside knowledge have you got, he's been convicted of a crime because he is a sexual predator. Hmm

DuelingFanjo · 21/06/2013 13:41

Given that the school already had one fairly recent case of a teacher persuing pupils in this way you would think that they would have been more vigilant and understanding of the law!

cantspel · 21/06/2013 13:45

How many times do i have to say it But again No excuse as what he did was wrong but 5 and a half years is excessive considering what others got for the same offense. If he was a sexual predator with an interest in young girls then the prosecution would have brought forward others he had groomed but there was no evidence given that he has done that and dont think for one minute that the police wouldn't have looked to see if this was his only offence or one of many.

FreudiansSlipper · 21/06/2013 13:46

weak and lacking in common sense Hmm

what he can not control himself when sexually aroused his sense of what is right and wrong disappears

FreudiansSlipper · 21/06/2013 13:48

no what is so so wrong is that others have got low sentences not that his is longer

mollygibson · 21/06/2013 13:48

I actually have zero sympathy for his family. Everything I've read about them indicates that they are completely deluded and in denial about what he's done - and now appear to be encouraging the "relationship". They also appear to be trying to blame his poor wife - apparently he was "trapped in a miserable marriage".

cantspel · 21/06/2013 13:49

Yes that is weak and lacking in common sense as any teacher with any sense wouldn't put themselves in a position where there could be aroused by a pupil.

RikeBider · 21/06/2013 13:50

What I don't get about people saying he was weak/impulsive/lacked common sense is surely:

right at the beginning when it was just holding hands (and he was warned about his behaviour by colleagues) any normal person would have thought "this is crossing a line, I must put a stop to this"?

the first time he sent her a private message, why didn't he think "this is crossing a line, married teachers don't send 14 year old girls private messages" and put a stop to it?

if it became clear she had feelings for him, why didn't he put some distance between them?

It wasn't like BANG suddenly they were in love and there's a naked 15 year old in his bed, what's a man to do but have sex with her. It went on for months, with him acting unprofessionally, inappropriately, lying, blogging about it Hmm even before it got to kissing and sleeping together and taking her out of the country to somewhere with more favourable age of consent laws. He acted purposefully and covered his tracks.

How is it that any of us manage to not shag everyone we like the look of?

DuelingFanjo · 21/06/2013 13:52

"considering what others got for the same offense"

the link i put up with the other teacher from the same school, that teacher got 7 years, Sometimes the law is an ass. Sometimes people get stupidly low sentences, particularly when it comes to rape and sexual abuses. Why not campaign and rail against that instead of sounding like you think he should have got less than he did?

Maryz · 21/06/2013 13:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SauceForTheGander · 21/06/2013 13:54

He groomed her. He's vile. Vile to his poor wife and to a vulnerable girl. Criminal behaviour towards the girl. Nothing romantic about it at all. Sleazy, opportunistic and taking total advantage of a naive girl who enjoyed the attention.

If, and it's a big bloody if, if he loves her he'd have waited until she was 18 and not messed up her education.

Five years is appropriate. Other (male and female) creeps out there should take note. 14 year olds are not fair game. They are kids.

DuelingFanjo · 21/06/2013 13:54

"in a position where there could be aroused by a pupil"

like being a teacher you mean? so he shouldn't have been teaching if he knew there was a chance he could be 'aroused by a pupil'.

You are making it sound like you think it's her fault but too right he shouldn't have been teaching.

DuelingFanjo · 21/06/2013 13:56

hang on - let me put the whole of what you wrote in...

"as any teacher with any sense wouldn't put themselves in a position where there could be aroused by a pupil."

perhaps he shouldn't have been teaching children then? Which is good isn't it because now he has been banned from doing that which seems an appropriate course of action.

Your comment is

cory · 21/06/2013 13:59

cantspel Fri 21-Jun-13 13:49:12
"Yes that is weak and lacking in common sense as any teacher with any sense wouldn't put themselves in a position where there could be aroused by a pupil."

You mean like sending her inappropriate text messages?

We're not talking about letting her get close enough to brush up against him in the classroom, we are talking about deliberately contacting her.

And fwiw other girls from his previous school have spoken to reporters about receiving texts and birthday cards from him; the reason this was not put in by the prosecution was presumably because it did not lead on to anything illegal.

But it does definitely suggest something more active than a teacher who suddenly finds himself aroused when he accidentally finds himself at close quarter with a female pupil.

Catlike · 21/06/2013 13:59

What view do some posters take of men that they think "whoops, I shagged a school girl" is somehow understandable??

They think that females have all the power in sexual situations and that men can't be expected to control themselves, ever.

That's why the likes of Jeremy Forrest have hundreds of apologists insisting that he can't be held responsible for "making a mistake", "succumbing to temptation" etc because he is just a poor, weak man after all and can't be expected to keep it in his pants.

He's even got his bloody family saying this is all down to what a caring, selfless person he is for Christs sake Hmm

I think there's also a kind of widespread disdain towards and suspicion of young girls that makes a lot of people accept without question that she was the instigator and he was just weak enough to be swept along with it all.

Dawndonna · 21/06/2013 14:01

?He said that I looked young. He said I looked 21. He was suggesting that was a good thing,? she said. Said by Forrest to his wife the night before he absconded with a minor.

Jeremy brought it up quite a lot ? ?When are we going to have kids? And do you want kids??. I just thought it was a bit weird because the relationship wasn?t great.?
Said to his wife. This is a man who wants control.

She said Forrest was angry that her daughter was doing nothing to stop the rumours, adding: ?I offered my apologies for my daughter?s behaviour. He kept going over and over again about his career.
To the girl's mother. Preparing the way, whilst he continues to groom the daughter. A man who could have walked away at any point. A man who is covering his tracks. Oh hang on, that would be a predator.

Catlike · 21/06/2013 14:02

I actually have zero sympathy for his family. Everything I've read about them indicates that they are completely deluded and in denial about what he's done - and now appear to be encouraging the "relationship". They also appear to be trying to blame his poor wife - apparently he was "trapped in a miserable marriage".

Totally agree molly, they sound horrendous.

FreudiansSlipper · 21/06/2013 14:06

this would all be so different if the teacher was female and the pupil male or both where they were the same sex

but teenage girls we all know are a danger to heterosexual men songs, films and books have all been dedicated to to this subject so it must be true Angry