We encourage children in our cafe BUT

[childfriendlycafeowner]

I hope you don't mind us asking any readers for their opinion on child behaviour in public places.

We run a small cafe in a small town, and we love doing it (opened up 4 months ago). The previous owners did not encourage children and families, we do, we bought high chairs and do what we can to make families feel welcome. But today two girls came in with a baby and a toddler, my guess is the toddler was 2. From the moment she arrived the screamed, not crying because she was upset but screaming because I guess she liked the sound of her own voice. We made comments to the mum in the hope she would take the hint that the child was disturbing all the other customers but her comment was "she is a little tinker isn't she" The other customers threw their food and drinks down their necks and left as quickly as they could, some complaining as they left. She did go quiet for a little while but she was screaming for probably at least half of the 1 hour plus that she was in the cafe.

When the lady came to pay we said to the lady that we are very sorry but unless she can stop her little girl disturbing all our other customers and driving them away perhaps she could sit in our outside seating area with her or not come in. We felt terrible to say this but it really was a terrible din that upset many people.

Are we being reasonable or unreasonable. Would you tolerate your child no matter how young being so disruptive to other people in public

Being told your toddler is not welcome will mean that customer will never return. Small town or not.

Possibly not Pictish. I just don't think this mother was in the slightest bit bothered (by the sounds of the op) that the child's screaming was annoying other people. I think that is very selfish and I think that half an hour is a long time to put up with that kind of screaming. I don't think most people would just sit there and let their child do that. Yes, kids do that sometimes, but you don't just sit there ignoring it. I wouldn't anyway.

It is my experience in the most child friendly countries that there is a level of behaviour expected and tolerated from local children. Children can be children and engage and interact but they are not allowed run riot is scream the place down.

I wouldn't have inflicted a screaming DC on others - I don't expect to have them inflicted on me.

Razzle being child friendly does not mean that Chidren running riot ad shrieking all over the shop, it's up to the parents to take RESPONSIBILITY for their children, not sitting back and doing nothing. Being child friendly means providing facilities for children, accepting tem into your establishment, not putting up with bad behaviour. No op is not a chidrens only cafe, but she is child friendly. She was polite to the mother, and suggested alternative seating because te child's screeching was getting on patrons nerves

I don't think they want that customer to return!

Neither would I in their position. I never go out to cafes with my friend with her screechy children anymore. I cannot stand it. She is a lovely person but it is unbearably embarrassing.

Exactly neuneu, there should be a level of behaviour that is expected according to age. Te mum in question should have tried to placate her child, if not take her outside for a bit if not leave

I think OP, that you need to decide who your demographic is, because you can't have it both ways.

Child friendly, or relaxing haven.

If the customer never returns it is a good thing! Quite true- child friendly countries expect a certain level of behaviour - we would be much more child friendly in UK if parents could be relied on to control or remove their children.

'No one is put off returning to a cafe because there was a screechy toddler there the last time. Particularly in a small town.'

I would be and I'm in a small town, because I know if I go in there again and there's another toddler playing up, the proprietor won't do jack shit about it.

Of course you can have it both ways OP- don't get fobbed off by selfish parents.

Exactly exotic, just that parents should take responsibility for their chikdren

I wouldn't return if I knew the owner wasn't going to do anything about it.

If my children screamed for 10 minutes, I would have paid and left as soon as I could (and possibly sooner than that). I would be embarrassed and want to spare everyone my child's anti-social behaviour. I'd also explain to the child that there wouldn't be any more lovely trips to the cafe until they learned to behave.
I wouldn't have sat around for an eternity sipping my coffee and having a jolly time while wondering why all the other customers were leaving so quickly.

You say that, but I don't swallow it. In a small town your choices are limited, and nah - you're not going to write off a cafe forever more because there was a nippy kid in there on one occasion.
You may insist otherwise but in the real world, you wouldn't.

I wouldn't go back to a cafe where there were screaming children (if the parents were doing nothing about it, that is) - it would make me wonder what else the owner would put up with.

My son is 4 and has serious behavioural problems. We don't take him to cafes, restaurants aside from McDonald's, food courts, etc. because he is highly disruptive, very hyper and unable to sit still and screams blue murder.

It's not acceptable to inflict that on other people in a small area like a café.

It is the same sort of attitude that ruins school plays- they just won't do the decent thing and take the child out! It is also the reason that so many places won't have children. They spoil it for all.

I wouldn't go back to a cafe where there were screaming children (if the parents were doing nothing about it, that is) - it would make me wonder what else the owner would put up with.

You say that cos it sounds good, but you don't mean it. You might well grumble about it, but you'd still go back again.

'You say that, but I don't swallow it.'

So I'm a liar then? Thanks for that. There are two places we avoid and have done for years, yes, in this tiny town, due to dire service just once.

But if it makes you feel better to assume I'm a liar, have at it.

In a small town you will not lose custom- everyone will be thrilled if you do something!

That is exactly it exoticfruits.

I see you are a liar, too, Sir.

Yes...you're lying. Or rather, embellishing for effect.
You wouldn't boycott a local cafe because on one visit, someone had a screechy kid.