To feel a little sorry for the 7 children benefits Mum.

[MilgramsLittleHelper]

www.itv.com/daybreak/hottopics/benefits-mum/

Is just seems like another bit of benefit bashing to me.

I know she shouldn't have had children she couldn't afford, but what hope of improving her lot???

UC may be scrapped but I still believe some form of welfare change will go ahead.

"itall - this women ages 34 ish had another child with her new DP.

where is her focus on her existing 6 children? she is not some desperate teenager.

yes is know their dads are no good but I think its romanticising to pretend that she is some 'great mother'."

Show me where I've said she's a great mother?

That grin may be considered goady feegle but I shall rise above it.

more than - its just you.

but you tried to explain your finances previously and your attempts to reduce your tax bill etc. and they made no sense using maths as it is generally understood. by people who can do maths. and understand company structures etc. and taxation.

I'm on benefits, and I don't believe that this woman needs a 6-bed house. Youngest 2yo - can share with mum.

I'm sharing with MY 2yo.

Boys in one room, girls in another. Over 16's in their own room. Been pretty much like this where I live for at LEAST 15 years...

Only proviso is that if any of the rooms have sloping ceilings unsuitable for bunk beds, you can get moved to a property either the same size with better ceilings, or if necessary then go up ONE bedroom.

It's funny how in my town, anyone in council or HA properties KNOWS that any more than 2 DC's one girl one boy, and your DC's will have to share a room. Not many people have more than 3 DC's, even those on benefits.

OK, I have 4, but a) conceived DS3 whilst using contraception, have since been sterilised. b) was with Ex and he was working.

Doesn't mean my DC's have a bedroom each, though. Bloody pipe dream last had when I owned my own house, pre epilepsy dx, and my then 3 DC's had a bedroom each in my lovely bought 4-bed house.

Floggingmolly

I don't remember saying she should be applauded. I asked how she wasn't putting her children first, as I can't see how she isn't.

I dont feel sorry for her either, she choose to have seven children and not work. All lifestyle choices. To moan that £2k a month in benefits is not enough when not doing a tap to pay into the system is plain greedy. What sort of example is she setting to her own children?

Youngest is under the age where she can claim IS, what will happen when they turn five - she will go to JSA or could simply have another.

Contraception is free in many forms and i highly doubt both partners didnt let her out of their sight to take the pill etc.

Berating the fathers for not paying is double standards, ALL the parents should be paying for them including her.

I agree benefits should be capped to two children and if already on benefits and having another thenno extra should be given. Workers dont get a payrise so why should those who are already reliant on benefits be handed more for being irresponsible?

Well I think having an on/off relationship is probably not providing a great example to her kids but hey Im old fashioned like that.

I just don't know what you do with this situation. There is no way she - having been out of work for so long and with no obvious lucrative skill set - can earn enough money to support the family alone. I agree that ALL the parents of these children should be supporting them.

And yet I don't want to see those kids in poverty and have some sympathy for her in feeling she is being badly treated as the resources she's used to are reduced. On the other hand dh and I could have umpteen kids too but we don't because we couldn't afford them...but then again I don't want to see these kids in poverty.

So I would have to settle for getting splinters I think........

Bonquers Wed 12-Jun-13 19:04:18
itsall how unfortunate that this woman became involved with not one but two contraceptive denying abusers????

Ahhh I keep promising myself I'll satay away from you...but I really can't help it!

Firstly, I said abuse could be one of many explanations can't help it if you can't retain information

Secondly, it actually is more likely that a woman (be it this or any other) who has experienced DA, will fall into a pattern of DA relationships.

morethan - explain exactly how she is putting her children first?

from where I am sitting, I would say it looks pretty damn likely that she isn't putting her children anywhere. I would say the tax payer is doing that, and very nicely, but not quite nicely enough for her so we gather.

It's so easy to hate when you have never been in that position. I'm on income support, I'm also doing a part time law degree. It will take six years so that s part of my long term plan. My short term plan is to get on a course for administration or similar. At my recent work focused interview at the jobcentre, I asked about applying for courses and was told we would do it at our next meeting.. In September! So bloody helpful! I had to then insist she helped me look for jobs and not one was I suitable for. Every job needed experience. I can't even get a cleaning job!

haha stay rather than satay

Hold on - if there is even ONE lot of DLA then she is exempt from the benefits cap...

Two DLA + Carer's Allowance = exempt from cap.

So of COURSE she might need extra bedrooms if her DC's have SN's that mean they aren't safe to share a room.

Gah. Why start a thread about a woman 'complaining' that she won't manage under the cap when she won't even be subject to the cap...

Ashoething " loads of people in my extended family who are on benefits-some of them 3rd generation claimants"

Really? You should phone up the DWP and let them know, they tried to do a study on families that had been workless for three generations and couldn't find any, they'll be grateful for your help.

Ashoething you seem to be having rather a go at feegle. I would like to point you to my earlier posts. I very much agree that we don't know what the situation was. It could have been abusive relationships. She could be a scrounger. All we are saying is that there MAY be more to this than any of us have seen.

I posted my own story, a situation similar to the one feegle has suggested. It does happen. I've been through it.

feegle, I think ignoramus has turned inflammatory. Best drop the term, eh?

Faster

I see you are spouting your usual bile. No, you and a few other people decided to not understand a simple financial arrangement. can't see how it adds any relevance to this thread actually.

What is just me, pray tell.

northern-many of us have said the same thing-we don't want to see the kids suffering for their mother's fecklessness but if we continue to reward this fecklessness then we are encouraging them to behave in exactly the same way. She already has 2 young adults at home who appear not to be in full time education/and or employment.

I am inflammatory to feegle-are you actually having a laugh? I have remained polite and not resorted to name calling. Oh and none of my posts have been deleted?

Why indeed,couthy...

She had another child after the father of her existing six fecked off and refused to pay a penny towards their upkeep, morethan
I'm genuinely confused at your repeated assertion that she "puts her children first" .

In what way, exactly?

Yes "really" *boulevard"-I am sure my local job centre are well aware of who the members of my family are thanks. In the area I used to live-Maryhill in Glasgow-there were many 3rd generation benefit claimants so the DWP obviously aren't looking too hard

I am happy to pm you there names if you wish?

morethan - no one understood how everything you said was true!

you raised your benefits. I raised your attempts to minimise your tax bill.
just like Amazon etc.

but keep on!

How anyone can manage on the minimum wage baffles me - and sadly this is what many uneducated or unqualified people have to manage on.

If there IS a situation where people are better off not workng than working then its the minimum wage that needs raising ( a lot!!) rather than benefits being cut.

Why should people do cleaning jobs and rough, hard physical jobs for a pittance! These jobs are just as important as any other job and should be well paid.
Sadly, People get punished for not being 'clever' enough to get a clean comfortable job.

I think we value the wrong things sometimes.

"feegle, I think ignoramus has turned inflammatory. Best drop the term, eh?" - I would, if I could but I can't where it's deserved

I don't mind being targeted, grumpy, I continuously said my explanation could be one of many, it's hilarious unfortunate that some posters can't see past that.

Your story has a fantastically positive outcome and it's exactly why I feel the way I do about supporting real people.