Re being instructed to wear specific colour to a party

[vintageclock]

A colleague of DH is having a 40th birthday party next month and we've been invited. It's a red and black themed party - all of the men are to wear black and all of the women red. I mean, WTF? Apart from the fact that red looks awful on me, why on earth should I be forced to go out and buy something in a colour I never wear to attend this party. DH thinks it's a bit cheeky as well. AIBU to simply regret the invite and say we're doing something else that night?

Can you get your hands on a communist looking uniform?

I think there are maybe two kinds of people

Those who go in for this and those who don't

Wish

If that's the case then I guess I don't understand/ have much in common with those who have the chutzpah to make themselves look good at the possible expense of others

the invite would be easier perhaps if it was black n white for everyone.

I hate this sort of crap passed your very early 20s

If I was the host I would far rather people watered down the dress code than stayed away because of it, that would be the ruder thing to do in my opinion. The idea is that guests should feel comfortable and enjoy themselves.

This is tasteful classy red outfit and all for the price of a pot of paint. Result!

I do get a bit about invites like this, seems a bit precious. And red was not a good choice. It's not an easy colour to wear, you either look stunning in it or dead, so I suspect that the wife is one of the ones that looks stunning!

Personally I would wear black with red accessories if I really wanted to go, but as a misery guts I would probably not go :o

Just dont go...
Its a party. Its meant to be fun. If you dont like it just decline. Why do people have to suck the fun out of everything?

It's her 40th. She can do whatever she likes (within reason).

Buy something cheap from New Look and give it to a charity shop if you'll never wear it again. You won't have wasted money.

Decline saying you don't have any red clothes.

Comunist uniform not with standing, you have 3 choices:

1. don't go
2. borrow stuff
3. buy something - there's loads of red dresses about for under 25 quid, shoes too.

not withstanding - damned autocorrect

Dress in black or whatever you'd like with a token hint of red and if she complains just say you're sorry but you didn't have a red outfit.

However, if you ate going to take along a token accessory then make it a red whip so you can then point out that you can indeed provide lashings of red as dictated requested on the invite.

Will also provide a great talking point and conversation opener during the party I'll bet... (and if you want another red accessory - I've got cheap feather boas in the past from my local Market for a couple of pounds. They shed feathers but also provided lots of fun and would have distracted from any host-perceived shortcomings in the redness of your outfit!

YABU and a bit of a misery guts. So what if you don't like red? it's one night. Just go and have a good time for God's sake woman

Summed up quite nicely chrome100

I think it sounds fun. I love the colour theme parties, rather than fancy dress where you definitely won't wear the outfit again.

You don't need to go if it offends you that much.

"Just buy something cheap"

Why should she have to buy anything at all? I hate this assumption that guests are happy to shell out on something they dont want, dont need and will never use again just so someone else has a colour coordinated party!

FGS it's not the law! It's a party. Wear black (so you can claim to be 'in the theme'(they are hardly likely to send you away) or don't go.

In related news - i was invited to an 'Orange' party (now that's a colour that suits nobody!) as the hosts were moving to holland. I wore a white dress with (red) poppies on and claimed colour blindness. I'm sure they were happy to have so many people there that they didn't really care about the dress code.

Reply: "Don't be silly darling, we're not at school. xx"

I dare ya.

Go dressed as a Pirate or a Pantomime Horse?

Tell the party police you misread the invitation.

"Why should she have to buy anything at all"

She doesn't have to, if you don't like the person enough to want to join in the celebration, wear the colour, drink that person's drink, eat their food and be welcome in their home, just don't go.

No-one at the party cares whether those around them suit red, it's not like guests are being dragged through the town, wearing tu-tu's.

You are all supposed to be there to have a good time and make that person's celbration memorable, it isn't difficult.

Depending on how well your dh knows/likes the person, then I would suggest asking them..... "Look, thanks for the invitation. We haven't got clothes in the colours you are specifying, would you rather we came in our own clothes or declined the invitation ?"
If they are rude enough to answer 'decline' then you know you are not missing anything. If he asks in front of other invited colleagues, then they will all breathe a sigh of relief too.

Something like this could work.

Or this?