To tell people that say that tattood parents don't set a good example to do one?

[Ilovemyself]

I have heard comments that tattood and pierced parents are not setting a good example. I have even heard sub human, and shouldn't be allowed to have kids.

My values are that everyone should be able to leave peacefully without causing a problem to anyone else and living by the laws of the land. I also teach my children politeness and that you should always be willing to help others.

Am I being unreasonable to tell them to look at their own life first ( especially those that smoke in front of their children).

BTW my wife and I are both heavily tattood and have piercings.

What is the point of your thread? To point out how brilliant you are because you have tattoos and don't smoke? All smokers are bad parents? Can you not see how judgey you are being, even though you started this off moaning because someone judged you?!

Stuntgirl I'm not saying smoking is a good thing to do in front of your kids, I agree it's not a good example. But it really doesn't determine whether you are a good parent or not.

I have four tattoos, a DD, my own house, I work with disabled adults and I have a diploma in child development and I'm 23, anyone who tells me I'm setting a bad example for her can FOTTFSOF. Being a judgmental prick is a far worse example to set.

Broken banana - by smokin in front of your children are you not indicating it is acceptable behaviour?

No, you're showing them that addictions exist and you're addicted to nicotine.

Yeah, the 'don't judge people who have tattoos but judge them if they smoke' is a load of crap. I suspect hairy knuckles.

YANBU it's so unimportant. If you have tattoos, fine. If you don't have tattoos, fine. It's got nothing to do with parenting.

Some people have too much time on their hands.

Suppose it depends on the tattoo really. I know one unfortunate bloke that had the place he was born tattooed on his neck. It wasn't spelt correctly! he also had a spider that only had 6 legs. He was setting a terrible example to his kids...

Misses point of thread completely

I think smoking in front of your children is diablolical parenting actually! So no, you are not a bad parent if you smoke, but you are a bad parent if you do this near your children - have you not heard of passive smoking? Its nothing to do with the fact that people will take up smoking if their parents smoke, my parents both smoked, it made me feel sick and i used to get so upset - my mums defence, even today after my dad died a slow lingering death from a smoking related illness - "i smoke, so thats it" like it is some god given right to inflict it on everyone else - disgusting.

I tend to agree that smoking is bad in a way that tatoos aren't. If you compare a parent with tatoos with the same parent without tatoos, theit is no difference for their children. If you take a parent that smokes and compare them with the same parent who doesn't smoke, there are known, measurable benefits for the children of the non-smokingparent.

Smoking is an addiction, but that doesn't mean it isn't bad for your children. Whereas tatoos aren't an addiction, but they aren't bad for your children either.

Crapswith. Please elaborate on hairy knuckles. Never heard that one!

Brokenbanana do you smoke by any chance? All I am saying is that smoking in front of your children ( thus either showing you accept it so it is ok or by letting them passively smoke) is far worse.

If I had wanted to start a thread about smoking in front of you children I would have

Emmaline. I would have to disagree that tattoos are not addictive lol

Yes but you could compare tattooed parents or any other parent with people who show poor examples to their children, until the cows come home but what's the point?

Smoking/drinking/over eating/taking drugs/driving everywhere

They're all poor examples to show our children

I just don't see what it has to do with tattoos

YANBU. Some people are silly.

I would reply with "children in the future will have a crap time then because tattoos are all the rage with the under 25s"

Who has said this to you? Surely this is a minority opinion which you can quite happily ignore.

By the way, when speaking about things that people do you say "who" instead of "that". "To tell people who say that", "especially those who smoke in front of their children".

I am an occasional smoker yes, but DS has never seen me smoke and never will.

I'm just really failing to see the point of this thread tbh.

The point was about getting upset with those that have said that having tattoos is setting a bad example or shows bad parenting. Wish I had never used the bleeding smoking example now............

So just use your common sense and ignore them. You know it doesn't reflect on your parenting skills and anyone with half a brain will agree with you. It's got nothing to do with smoking.

Yes but how many people have ever said that to you in your life OP?

It's not exactly common is it?

And if you have as many tattoos and piercings as you say, surely you'd just roll your eyes and get on with your day?

When I was young, I expected my parents to be strong and able to protect me. That would have included not getting visibly 'upset' over things that people say. To be honest, seeing a parent get worked up over a comment would have bothered me more than anything.

So many people seem to become destabilised, almost, over really trivial comments that other people seem to make on a constant basis.

and Worra, who types more quickly than I do, nips in and says what I meant to say, but in fewer, better words...

YANBU. I have a personalised half back piece that took months to get done(in days of yonder..) and has many colours. Because I'm prone to passing out from exhaustion sleeping on my tum, I'm often awakened by my DC playing 'the rainbow song' with my back!!

Not sure about better, but definitely fewer

I have one tattoo, planning on a few more and some piercings after my wedding! Also rock/alternative community, plenty of us have kids, and I have yet to see a bad parent. I don't smoke in front of DS, but I will occasionally drink in front of him. I see nothing wrong with it, better he learns early on about drinking responsibly than have it turned into a taboo. Kind of a "it's normal to have a beer or two with dinner, no need to get sloshed" sort of thing.

I love the idea of having a secret tattoo. Ohhh look at me, cardigan, lilac and pearls and then BOOM. Flaming skull on my arse cheek.