th think this is not the way that a nurse should speak to a patient

[moiner]

My brother has had an operation on his kidneys and has been in hospital for the last 6 days. One of the nurses has told him that he?s the fittest boy they have had on the ward all year and whenever she speaks to him she calls him ?pretty boy? instead of his name. On top of this she?s told him that he is even cuter when he?s asleep. I think this is quite unprofessional behaviour towards a patient by a nurse but my DP thinks I?m being a grumpy old sod and that she is just tailoring her manner towards a 19yo boy. AIBU?

Totally unprofessional and I hope some senior member of staff catches her at it. It doesn't matter if she likes flirting or not, or whether he enjoys it or not, there are certain professional standards that should be upheld.

The problem with hospital banter is that it becomes ingrained and then very difficult for another patient to say that actually they are not comfortable.

It is unprofessional but at 19 he's an adult so if he wants to complain he can but its up to him.

Given how many posts there have been about rude nurses or non existent nurses or general awful neglectful treatment received by all sorts of HCP I would say that there are worse things that could be happening.

It's up to your brother if of course he is of sound mind and able to make the decision.

As he enjoys the flattery in hospital after an op, then all well and good and can speed up his recovery and is good for his moral.

At least she's not swearing and punching him about. He doesn't mind, so stay out of it. I've seen nurses talk to elderly male patients in a similar way.

Still not convinced that it's a good idea to have unprofessional behaviour from a hospital professional even if it does cheer one particular patient up. And the defence that it is not swearing and punching seems to be setting standards ridiculously low.

Some of our students might be enormously cheered up if the professor made love to them. It would still be inappropriate conduct.

The line about him being even cuter when he is asleep definitely seems to be overstepping the boundary to me.

I wouldn't report this if I were a relative, seeing that the young man is able to do that for himself. But I would hope that she got pulled up.

I don't see the issue at all, she thinks he is good looking and is using this to build a rapport with her patient. Would people rather nurses behaved in a cold and robotic way

Just noticed a typo in the title, it should read

to think this is not the way that a nurse should speak to a patient

Is she being factually acurate? Is he that cute and cuter when asleep? If so it's only the truth, no? Anyway, sounds like she may end up as your sister-in-law and starting things off by reporting her might not be a great start!

Very unprofessional but it's not your problem so I don't see what you can do about it. You could mention casually to the sister in charge of the ward maybe but I'd be loathed to sticky beak as your brother might not mind.

Also, she may be following his lead. You don't know what he says when you are not there!!

None of your business - he is 19 - he is probably flirting too.

If he feels "harassed" he can make a complaint surely?

Why are you do "offended" on his behalf?

sagfold- He is quite good looking but that is beside the point

Sounds like they've got it going on!

Flirting with a patient sounds very unprofessional-even if he is OK with it.

Cute-and cuter when sleeping-creepy!

But I agree that it's up to him to complain if he wants.

That is completely inappropriate and the comments implying she watches him sleep are downright creepy!

Shylepite- Its hardly creepy, all it suggests is that she noticed it when she checked on him.

Well personally I don't like the idea of medical staff sizeing me up as it were for attractiveness when I'm asleep. What they notice in a patient who is not with it is something they should keep to themselves.

If he likes it then I cant see the problem here. He is an adult.

I'd think it's all about what he thinks of it, really.
Yes it's maybe a bit unprofessional, but it's building a rapport, and if he enjoys it, then I think it's fine.

You could look at it both ways - yes she's being unprofessional OR she is trying to make him laugh and keep his spirits up. If he isn't bothered by it then you just have to let it go.

Quite unprofessional, but he enjoys it and she knows he does I wouldn't say anything.
She could end up becoming your sister-in-law!