Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think that at a children's disco, boys and girls shouldn't be encouraged to judge each other on their looks - hot or not stylie.

50 replies

EightToSixer · 25/05/2013 16:32

DD has just come back from a kids birthday party - they are all year 6 so 10-11 years old.

Apart from the standard dance-offs etc, the children were encouraged to stand in an arch (boys) and for the girls to dance under the arch and when the music stops, be captured and judged by thumbs up - hot and thumbs down - not (ugly) by the boys that captured them.

Am I alone in thinking that its entirely unacceptable to judge pubescent children - who in Year 6 are just learning about sex-ed, just getting their first bras etc - on their looks alone in a party format.

Willing to accept the judgement of mumsnet if I'm being overly precious about this, but surely, public appreciation/mocking of appearance in such an organised setting isn't really to be encouraged among children?

OP posts:
ZZZenagain · 25/05/2013 16:36

no, that is pathetic

Tailtwister · 25/05/2013 16:37

YANBU, that's horrible!

gordyslovesheep · 25/05/2013 16:38

yanbu - that is vile

EightToSixer · 25/05/2013 16:39

I do hope I'm not in denial about DD growing up or anything. I just remembered that in my Year 7 geography trip, some of the kids played spin the bottle and kissed, and she's only 6 months off that age... but it's the public judgement aspect more than anything that gets to me.

OP posts:
MrsMcEnroe · 25/05/2013 16:40

YANBU. What a horrific thing to do.

Fuck's sake. Who organised the judging? If it was a parent they should be thoroughly ashamed of themselves.

scaevola · 25/05/2013 16:43

Yuk.

With the prevalence of shows in which the audience votes for people, I wouldn't have been surprised if children that age came up with something like that off their own bat. But my reaction would be to divert them on to something else (if I noticed, at that age supervision is looser). To encourage it seems like madness.

BackforGood · 25/05/2013 16:44

YANBU - that really is vile. At any age or stage of life that is vile.
Who on earth got them to do that ?

Hummuschocolate · 25/05/2013 16:44

YADNBU, it wouldn't be particularly fun if it was adults involved imo but with children its awful.

pictish · 25/05/2013 16:44

Dreadful - entertainment from the dark ages that is.

Floggingmolly · 25/05/2013 16:46

That is vile! Shock

TheHonourableAlgyLacey · 25/05/2013 16:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lljkk · 25/05/2013 17:01

yanbu, rather immature. Though it's the age, they are doing a lot of this spontaneously. Don't need to be taught it. My cohort were the same.

lljkk · 25/05/2013 17:01

(meant immature of any adult to encourage it)

LindyHemming · 25/05/2013 17:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

EstelleGetty · 25/05/2013 17:08

That's disgusting. Girls (and boys) are already getting so self-conscious at that age. I hope none of them were upset by it. You really would have to hold me back from decking the idiot who devised that game.

catgirl1976 · 25/05/2013 17:30

YANBU - Was that really adult suggested / sanctioned?

Shock
SoleSource · 25/05/2013 17:34

Vile

Yanbu

TheCrackFox · 25/05/2013 17:44

YANBU

I would seriously complain.

EightToSixer · 25/05/2013 17:45

Well I'm glad I'm not over-thinking it.

As far as I can tell none of the parents there were very involved, I dropped DD and friends off and friends mum picked them up but didn't know anything until we got them home.

I might write a letter to ths DJ, who is local and does all the school discos too and give him the opinion of mothers of girls this age and see what he says. I don't want other children at parties to be upset.

OP posts:
sue52 · 25/05/2013 17:50

YANBU. I'd be fuming. Girls do not need this. Would it be worth having a word to the parent who booked this DJ? She might not know this took place.

LovelyMarchHare · 25/05/2013 17:53

dreadful. What a completely terrible idea.

Helpyourself · 25/05/2013 17:57

Horrible. Sad

LineRunner · 25/05/2013 18:06

Who on earth booked this DJ and let it happen?

He is a twat.

Alisvolatpropiis · 25/05/2013 18:13

That's really horrible. School discos weren't like that when I was that age (2000). Children can be cruel enough without adults encouraging it.

muffinmonster · 25/05/2013 18:50

Jesus Christ, that's awful. I'd complain.