Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

So my MIL just told me she's pregnant... AIBU to feel weird about it?

88 replies

KirjavaTheCat · 24/05/2013 20:39

It's none of my business, is it?

Even if she said herself that the only reason she started trying for another baby is because I'm pregnant.

And the fact that when we told her I'm pregnant she sobbed for an hour and refused to talk to us for weeks, because she was upset that we'd decided to have another baby, thereby jeopardizing the relationship our DS has with her 4yo daughter... because now he'd have a sibling and wouldn't be 'interested' in her.

And that she didn't think that she'd be able to have another child due to fertility issues, and because of that we are being very, very selfish.

Still none of my business, I know. I'm feeling judgmental. Put me in my place please.

OP posts:
dearcathyandclare · 24/05/2013 21:30

You sound jealous, end of.

pictish · 24/05/2013 21:30

Even if she said herself that the only reason she started trying for another baby is because I'm pregnant.

And the fact that when we told her I'm pregnant she sobbed for an hour and refused to talk to us for weeks, because she was upset that we'd decided to have another baby, thereby jeopardizing the relationship our DS has with her 4yo daughter... because now he'd have a sibling and wouldn't be 'interested' in her

And that she didn't think that she'd be able to have another child due to fertility issues, and because of that we are being very, very selfish.

But weird about how it all came about and the sense of 'hah!' she had as she was telling me.

She's stated that the reason she is pregnant is because I am, she said that to me

Just in case you missed any of that dearcathy.

Yes...really.

CotherMuckingFunt · 24/05/2013 21:34

Is dearcathy the mil?

dearcathyandclare · 24/05/2013 21:36

well we only have the OP's view here don't we, and she sounds weird too. It is a wanted child as far as we can make out, but not one wanted by the OP as perhaps it is stealing her thunder?

pictish · 24/05/2013 21:38

No... dearcathy is a common garden shit stirrer.

OP I think you just have to shrink away from her. What does your dh make of all this?

dearcathyandclare · 24/05/2013 21:38

Not me Grin but understand the need for a 'late lamb'

dearcathyandclare · 24/05/2013 21:39

Pctish
that is quite offensive.

pictish · 24/05/2013 21:40

No one is disputing the a-okness of a late lamb. No one.
People are discussing the mil's batshit craziness surrounding said late lamb.

Juniperdewdropofbrandy · 24/05/2013 21:41

How bizarre.

I'd stay as far away as I could.

Loulybelle · 24/05/2013 21:41

Thats a little weird, not the pregnancy, because my sister had a baby before my mum did a year later at 41.

But the fact that she did just because your pregnant, thats just odd.

pictish · 24/05/2013 21:44

I remember your previous post as well OP...all the stuff about the mil being worried that another baby would spoil the sibling relationship between her dd and your son.

That is a woman who thinks she is entitled to way too much of a say.

dearcathyandclare · 24/05/2013 21:44

But again we only have one side of the story here, so I will leave now but restate, OP YABU, enjoy your pg and let MIL enjoy hers.

NotYoMomma · 24/05/2013 21:47

I'm not even joking here but I wwould wait til she is 55 and get pregnant again just to piss on her chips

IneedAsockamnesty · 24/05/2013 21:48

Family members often do get pregnant when another family member does sometimes the idea of it just happens because the first pregnancy does put it in there minds much the same as weddings really

Some women get to a certain age and rejoice about that part of there life being over others really struggle with it.

Nothing much wrong with that.

However I don't recall your other thread so I'm going just from the current one.

Original poster
KirjavaTheCat · 24/05/2013 21:48

He actually doesn't know yet, he was at work when she called, he'll be home in an hour!

No option of staying away, theirs is a complicated situation.

Had no intention of doing anything but that, dearcathy, but thanks.

OP posts:
pictish · 24/05/2013 21:59

And how interestiing that she should call you before telling him.

TiredFeet · 24/05/2013 22:01

Agree with pictish she sounds bonkers. Not for being pregnant, but the reasons she has given /behaviour around it all. On the plus side she sounds like she could be a nightmare but hopefully she will have her hands too full to cause you many problems for a while!

DontMeanToBeRudeBut · 24/05/2013 22:03

What a weirdo. Competitive baby-bearing? Confused I'd steer well clear.

Juniperdewdropofbrandy · 24/05/2013 22:05

Well just try not to let her situation get to you.

I'm almost 45 and shudder at the thought of having a baby now. Dss would probably like it though. Luckily dp's been 'done'.

Alconleigh · 24/05/2013 22:28

Is this real? it's all a bit Hollyoaks.

Fakebook · 24/05/2013 22:35

I don't think OP sounds jealous at all. It's all a bit strange having your MIL pregnant at the same time as you isn't it? The fact she sobbed at OPs pregnancy instead of being happy at the prospect of becoming a grandmother is just strange. It's like she's trying to prove she's not old enough to be a grandmother or something. Very weird.

Fakebook · 24/05/2013 22:39

Just like to add, I have had a family member in her mid 40's "compete" with me in having another baby. I was actually told in so many words that I wasn't the only one capable of having another baby. This was after I'd given birth to ds after 2 years of suffering miscarriages. So yes, there are some fucked up people in the world who do compete when it comes to child bearing.

Original poster
KirjavaTheCat · 24/05/2013 22:50

100% real. Honestly it's best I don't expand on the odd things that she's done in the past, I will look like a liar.

Other people have MILs like this, right?

OP posts:
pictish · 24/05/2013 22:53

Hell no!

pictish · 24/05/2013 22:55

I think there have been some who have had their mil compete with them in other ways...but never seen this before.

Swipe left for the next trending thread