in finding the "busy mum" thing ANNOYING

[Nehru]

and " the rare moment I get a minute to myself" and
" i have no time to brush my hair" ( or whatever).

Specially when it is said on here after a good hour or so of titting about!

But busy mums..ARGH

I agree with LeBFG. If you're truly busy? You have no time to complain about being busy.

I have 3 children - 5, 3, nearly 11 months

And I'm pretty busy.

Since the 3rd arrived it has been pretty full on TBH

I love being busy and I tend to take on slightly more than I can easily manage.

I don't really talk about it either, because why would I?

Last week there was a funny thread about this, and as often happens now this week there is a sneery one.

Some people find parenthood overwhelming.

I really struggled with my first. I often didn't manage to do normal stuff that seems easy, because I was totally out if my depth and barely coping.

Now I run around like a (happy) blue-arsed fly with 3 and do playgroups and PTA and socialise lots and none of it phases me.

But I don't think it's very nice to be dismissive of women who don't find it all a doddle.

Women (as a whole) do far more than their fair share of domestic work and childcare as well as all the paid work they do.

So it is very likely that there are a lot of very busy mums around wrecking themselves trying to hold it all together.

They deserve better than our contempt.

"If you're truly busy? You have no time to complain about being busy."

That is a crock of shit.

You might as well argue that really busy people have no time to shite.

So agree with the ones who never have a night out. Fgs

What athing said. I think a lot of it is down to how you are coping emotionally.
I'm busy, but I choose to be busy. Doing things with the kids, meeting their friends, going to groups etc. I look for time management tips so I can spend less time doing the things I dislike, not because I don't have time to do them! :o and ultimately, I feel I'm coping and I'm happy. Others may not be so fortunate.

on the one hand I guess it is optional and I could plonk them in front of the tv and lie on the sofa blogging, but then I'd feel shit anyway so I don't.

I've never got the loo thing though, hot drinks I can manage no problem, but I still haven't got to the loo in peace unless DH is there. Ds causes havoc or dd will shout me. If I put ds in the playpen he screams like there's a lion in there with him, and I don't call being on my own while the baby screams going to the loo "in peace"? What am I doing wrong? I would love tips there!!!

I agree. People surely choose to have thousands of kids, do OU etc.

Yup. 4 kids, you'll be busy.

It's not forced on you.

I've got a friend who goes on and on about being a busy mum. I agree that there are some busy mums but she isn't one of them! She has one child who is at school, doesn't have a paid job, has her shopping delivered, and pays a cleaner and a gardener. I can entirely understand someone being really busy when they are doing childcare, cleaning, shopping and cooking and perhaps a paid job too but not when they delegate most of that to other people.

I was really busy when I had a young child and I found it exhausting - childcare, cleaning, cooking, shopping, all the general household admin, walking to and from school and shops, sometimes working FT or PT. I always found it hard TBH.

Some women never go out because they are breastfeeding a baby that can never be put down.

Others never get to go out because they are working their fingers to the bone while their lazy arse husbands sit on their arses watching TV.

Another group are home alone because all the leisure time and money is used up by their "partner"

Still others have nobody to go out with and are terribly lonely.

Do they really deserve such derision?

Its not about people bring busy though. Its about " busy mums"
Advertisers who use the term do it in such a patronising way. And yes, what about busy dads. Or " busy working dads".Ever hear that phrase? Yes, I think mothers end up doing more generally, but lets not normalise that by making it a " thing".

"People surely choose to have thousands of kids, do OU etc."

So?

People choose to have high-stress jobs.

Is anyone allowed to moan about being busy?

Or are they only allowed to moan about people they imagine themselves superior to?

No

No moaning allowed. ;)

Yes, I think mothers end up doing more generally, but lets not normalise that by making it a " thing".

Totally agree, IfNot.

The advertising schtick is awful and worth kicking against.

But this thread is a lot more about slagging women off.

I am a very bloody busy mum! Until she goes to bed at 7pm and then I slob in my PJ's

Can't stand the ads that talk about 'busy mums'. Fuck off and don't patronise me, ad man.

I cant stand the people who stand about gossiping & taking multiple breaks but when help is needed they are really busy. My colleague is like this, it drives me nuts.

I'm fairly busy.

But I wee fast, so the toilet thing's not an issue

I agree with AThing. I think this thread has ended up being a dig at mums who don't cope well, even though it started about the marketing hype. It has gone quite nasty. I found it incredibly difficult when I had my first. Sometimes I didn't brush my hair. I rarely went to the loo on my own. I was exclusively breastfeeding and couldn't express so didn't go out for months. I have a demanding job and have since had another baby. All my choice yes but I still find it tough juggling everything. Its just so great to hear how inadequate I am.

As I have said before, I am a lazy bisom. The main thing that keeps me busy is avoiding being busy. In the dim and distant past I used to admire a friend who was always shooting about and oh so busy. Her home was tidy and so were her kids. I gradually realised she did it all between 8 and 9.30 am The rest of the time she was out 'gallivanting' as my mum would say. I gallivant but bugger all gets done in the morning first
YANBU

All the wrath about the Marketing people patronising and offending women, on a thread where women are managing just fine judging and insulting others.

Nice.

I never read page 2 I thought this was a funny thread. Its not.

Ah yes, the classic, people being different to others situation. Awful.