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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

fed up with bing forced to stay at expensive, poncy hotels at weddings and get my own back by getting married in a cave?

72 replies

bettycocker · 20/05/2013 01:01

Like the titles says really. And hen dos too. I resent paying premium prices, to stay in poncy hotels when you're a wedding guest, but most of all for the kinds of relatives you see twice a year tops. I'm happy to give a pressie, but not so much with the hotel bill. If you dont fork out for the hotel room, people think you are either too mean, or too poor.

So, I am planning to get married in a cave. DP is totally up for this and it must be possible.

My DM thinks it is a terrible idea. She says caves can dark, dank and they are unpleasant places. l like caving and it is beautiful underground. My DM has asked me what people should wear - wellies? I replied that if it works for them, they can wear what they like. She asked if I would wear a wedding dress with a pair of wellies. I replied that it was a distinct possibility. We haven't told ILs yet.

AIBU to get married in a cave and AIBU to derive an evil pleasure from being a bridezilla who will also mildly exact revenge upon all the people who have made me stay in poncy hotels when I didn't actually want to for all these years?

I also intend to get married in a remote location and hire a "down to earth" place for the reception and guest accomodation. they'll attend a wedding in a cave and hopefull stay in a Welsh pub/B&B in the middle of nowhere - deal with it mofos, it's my turn to be bridezilla. Grin

By the way, as the bride, I shall also do my own speach and will keep my own surname. Bollocks to convention.

OP posts:
CheerfulYank · 20/05/2013 01:04

Sounds lovely. :) Congrats!

bettycocker · 20/05/2013 01:05

Thanks CheerfulYank. I think it sounds lovely. Have you ever been caving? It is very peaceful and comfortable underground. Some caverns are breathtakingly beatiful. I am researching whether it is possible near me or in Wales.

OP posts:
AThingInYourLife · 20/05/2013 01:20

I would go to a wedding in a cave if it was a cave I could easily walk into (and crucially back out of). :o

Any crawling through tight spaces or hint that I could get stuck down there and I would make my excuses.

I'm mildly claustrophobic and start to come out in a cold sweat at the very thought of crawling through tight spaces.

I do love (easy access :o ) caves though.

A really beautiful cavern seems a very appropriate venue for a wedding - there's something almost sacred about a space like that.

tiredlateandup · 20/05/2013 01:21

I have actually been to a wedding in a cave and it was lovely (not in UK though). Didn't need wellies but a lot of the guests (and bride and groom) went mostly barefoot.

bettycocker · 20/05/2013 01:22

I wouldn't expect the elderly folk to squeeze though any tunnels, Smile but I think you're right. It would be a beautiful place for a ceremony.

OP posts:
WafflyVersatile · 20/05/2013 01:45

I do not want to crawl on my elbows under a mountain but apart from that go for it. don't be upset when people decline your invite though.

www.carnglaze.com/contact-us.html

Make them camp in tents. None of this fancy B&B nonsense.

WafflyVersatile · 20/05/2013 01:46

www.wales-underground.org.uk/ogof/information.shtml

StuntGirl · 20/05/2013 02:07

Have you seen that Don't Tell The Bride where she wants to get married in a cave?

Two couples who did get married in a cave.

CSIJanner · 20/05/2013 02:08

Saw a wedding like this on four weddings. It look fantastic and was different. The only thing was that you would need to warn elderly relatives that there will be quite a few steps and it will get cold, so thick cardies at the ready.

Congrats!

MammaTJ · 20/05/2013 04:13

I was just going to say I saw a wedding in a cave on four weddings. IIRC, they did wear wellies. It looked great and really different.

pudcat · 20/05/2013 06:43

There was a wedding on TV last week in the big cave in the Lechwedd slate mines in Wales. All the guests went down in the big cable tram.

AllOutOfIdeas · 20/05/2013 07:27

http://www.wookey.co.uk/wookey-information/weddings/ not quite Wales but its lovely there!

jojane · 20/05/2013 07:30

You an get married at dan-y- ogof car in Wales - the welsh national showcases, is easy access for most people as in not having to crawl around, and is cold but can look pretty with fairy lights etc. also when we looked into it the hotel down the road was doing a really good deal of you got married in February

D0GWithAYoni · 20/05/2013 07:33

Sounds fab do it. Your wedding! I rode a horse to my wedding people said I was mad but it was fab.

I had a few stupid questions:

"What if you fall off and get grass stains on your dress"

"Well, then I will have grass stains on my dress who cares"

"What if you're covered in horse hair"

"Well I'll be covered in horse hair "

It was amazing none of the above happened and I'm glad for sticking to my guns.

AllOutOfIdeas · 20/05/2013 07:35

oops maybe this might work

wibblyjelly · 20/05/2013 07:54

I think Cheddar Gorge do marriages in their caves-I love the idea!

bettycocker · 20/05/2013 07:57

WafflyVersatile I wouldn't want to actually make people go caving and crawl through mud! Grin Thanks for the links.

StuntGirl Thanks. My wedding wouldn't be weird after all.

AllOutOfIdeas Thanks for the link.

jojane and pudcat Thanks for the info.

We really don't want anything too big. Neither me nor DP are into pomp and ceremony. We would quite like to hire a place for camping and have a massive BBQ for the reception, but the British weather is unpredictable. I suppose that's what marquees are for.

OP posts:
jamdonut · 20/05/2013 08:01

I went to a wedding at a zoo, and stayed at a nearby caravan site.

Love your cave idea! I'd come! Especially as I could wear sensible shoes and not cripple myself in high heels Smile

AnneEyhtMeyer · 20/05/2013 08:02

You can get married in a cave in Derbyshire. I haven't been to a wedding in this place, but I was in the cave when it was all set up for a wedding and it looked stunning: here

MrsWolowitz · 20/05/2013 08:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pigletmania · 20/05/2013 08:04

Wookie hole caves do weddings Smile. Yabvu you don't have to go to these wedding if you can't afford it! Nobody will bat an eyelid if you stay in a bnb instead of the couples hotel on the wedding night.

DoctorRobert · 20/05/2013 08:05

depends. if all your guests are young and adventurous then fine.

if however you have elderly guests, people with arthritis etc, then yabvu. my mum wouldn't have gone in a cave for example.

weddings should accommodate your guests

Tailtwister · 20/05/2013 08:07

Sounds fantastic! I wish one of my friends would do something similar.

SantanaLopez · 20/05/2013 08:14

Remote (ie in the arse end of nowhere) B&Bs are just as poncy and annoying as castles and hotels.

Cave sounds fab though. Your music could be sooo atmospheric.

HerrenaHarridan · 20/05/2013 08:24

I think it's a great idea!

Can I come?

Will you video yelling you ils and share with us Wink

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