Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that this is really inconsiderate?

132 replies

SweetSeraphim · 08/05/2013 21:48

Neighbour one, I'm afraid.... Hmm Grin

So - next door have 3 boys, aged about 7, 5 and 2 ish... They're ok neighbours, we don't chat much or anything but we're polite.

We both work full time, have 4 dc between us, 7, 8, 12 & 15, and we try and get a bit of a lie in on a weekend if we can, I get up at 6 every weekday, and if we're lucky, we get to lie in until about half 8 at the weekend, it's glorious.

However.... as soon as the weather gets warmer, next door neighbours let the dc out to play in the back garden between 7 and half past. They're really noisy and have loads of really loud toys, electric ride-along stuff, you know. I had forgotten this happened last year, and it pissed me off then - I remembered with clarity this weekend Hmm

So what do I do? Do I put a note through the door like a yellow bellied coward? Or do I knock and ask them to be a bit more considerate? Will they look at me like this? Hmm AIBU?

OP posts:
WhoDat · 09/05/2013 02:09

Have you tried ear plugs though, seriously? DH is the worst snorer and makes an ungodly racket and they've saved my sanity. I have heavy duty oil rig approved earplugs, and very fancy eye mask (silk Wink) and sleep like a hairy arsed trucker. If they worked then you wouldn't have to do sweet f.a.

Morloth · 09/05/2013 02:16

Ear plugs.

Suburbia is loud.

It it isn't kids it will be dogs, or the roar of the leaf blower.

Boots do a fabulous brand called 'Bio Ears', they are your friend.

AThingInYourLife · 09/05/2013 02:35

No way would I keep my children indoors on a beautiful summer's morning.

When I used to get lie ins the world outside didn't come to a standstill.

People still mowed their lawns, drove their cars, played with their friends, listened to their music.

They do it still when my children are in bed.

And I don't expect them not to enjoy their gardens to make sure I can sleep.

I wouldn't give the children motorised toys ever that early.

But bollocks to keeping them inside when it's sunny out.

We get little enough good weather.

If you want to sleep through it undisturbed by people being outdoors then buy some earplugs.

Original poster
SweetSeraphim · 09/05/2013 07:50

So people mow their lawns and play their music at 7am then do they?

OP posts:
Morloth · 09/05/2013 07:53

They do in my neighborhood - I don't because I am too lazy.

On the weekend because everyone works every weekday.

likesnowflakesinanocean · 09/05/2013 07:57

I wpuldnt want them out shouting and screaming but playing noise wouldn't bother me. swings and roundabouts my kids might be out playing at half eight but when my kids are in bed they might have a BBQ and I wouldn't expect them to be quiet

MissAnnersley · 09/05/2013 07:58

I think 9am is plenty early enough for children to be out running around in the garden. I don't do lie ins myself but would also not cut grass before then either.

It's just showing a little consideration.

Sparklymommy · 09/05/2013 09:15

Mine go out before school to jump on the trampoline. I see it as exercise! Probably 8-8:15am til 8:30am. My kids aren't up at 7 am!!!!

AThingInYourLife · 09/05/2013 12:25

People regularly mow their lawns and play their music at times when other people are asleep.

In the evening, at lunchtime, in the afternoon.

Some people go to bed at 7pm, others nap after lunch, still others in the afternoon.

If you want to sleep when most people are up, you need to be able to sleep through noise or take steps to reduce your ability to hear the noise.

There is nothing sacred about wanting to be asleep at 7.30am.

It's the daytime.

valiumredhead · 09/05/2013 12:30

I think you need to buy some ear plugs :)

fairylightsinthespring · 09/05/2013 15:06

I keep mine in until 9ish at least, even though in DS's case that might mean he's been up 3 hrs already. Our neighbours are a family of very late teens so will have been out partying Fri and Sat night, they won't appreciate my two pre-schoolers fighting over the trampoline or whatever at 7.30. Equally, they don't stay out in the back garden late at night when mine have gone to bed and I have heard their mum shush them when they swear in the garden during the day in case mine are outside, which I think is very nice of her.

Tailtwister · 09/05/2013 15:12

I think any time before 8.30am is too early to be playing outside. It's fine if you have acres of land between you and your neighbours, but if you live cheek to jowl like most of us, it's inconsiderate.

I don't know how you would address it though.

Quilty · 09/05/2013 15:14

YANBU - I think it's really inconsiderate of your neighbours, they probably let them play outside that early so they're not being pestered by them until they want to get up and have breakfast!

I don't think leaving a note would be a good approach. Maybe start by asking if they could not let them use the noisy toys that early in the morning?

KellyElly · 09/05/2013 15:18

Considering builders aren't allowed to make noise before 8am at the weekend you are not being unreasonable to expect people not to let their kids tear about on motorised toys before then. Just have a polite word and see how it goes.

I think especially on a Sunday you are just rude as a parent if you let your kids go out making loads of noise at 7.30am. Just bringing your children up to not be considerate to anyone else IMO. I wouldn't hoover/put my washing machine on at that time at the weekend. It's just basic manners really.

If you want your kids running about making loads of noise at that time, then take them to the park!

Ledkr · 09/05/2013 15:27

No mine are not allowed out to play until about 9 at the weekend.
We never were either.
I think some people have never been taught to consider others.

Ledkr · 09/05/2013 15:31

I even stop then screaming in the day. Not everyone wants to hear other people's kids when enjoying their garden.

Original poster
SweetSeraphim · 09/05/2013 21:48

I'm gobsmacked at some of you, honestly. Take them to the park if you're so keen on them being out in the beautiful weather! Why do the rest of your neighbours need to be treated to your dc's noise?

I work hard, and I deserve a lie in sometimes. My children have been taught to be considerate and quiet when necessary... why can't yours?

Out of interest, those of you that are happy for your dc to wake everyone else early in the morning... where are you at this point? Outside with them? Is there a teeny part of you that wants them to wake everyone up because you're envious that you're not still asleep yourself?

It's 7am. Not 10 in the morning.

OP posts:
CrapBag · 09/05/2013 21:52

YANBU. This would do my fucking nut in. I am very intolerant to noise and can just about cope with my neighbours very loud instruments because it isn't unreasonable times thankfully. But kids outside on a weekend at anything before 10 9 is extremely inconsiderate.

I think you have to have a polite word. I can't word stuff diplomatically so I won't help you on that one. Grin

CrapBag · 09/05/2013 21:57

I also don't put washing machine etc on too early and I tell DS to stop stamping his feet because it makes hell of a racket and you can hear everything in these houses. Its basic manners and courtesy really.

DorisIsWaiting · 09/05/2013 21:57

I'm so greatful that our neighbours are up earlier than us (5ish to sort the newspapers for the shop) In the summer the dc can get out when ever they like.

DorisIsWaiting · 09/05/2013 21:59

grateful! Blush

Quangle · 09/05/2013 22:01

Mine aren't allowed out till 9. Common courtesy tbh. We all have tiny gardens that back onto each other plus there's a sort of noise tunnel effect.

My neighbour three doors down lets her boys in the garden at 7.30 but she's a silly mare anyway so no surprise that she thinks it's ok to do that.

No advice though. It's hard to tell people that they are being anti-social and thoughtless in a nice way.

MrsOakenshield · 09/05/2013 22:09

very inconsiderate, of them and of everyone on this thread who thinks it's fine (a minority, thank goodness). If it's so essential for them to be outside at this time, then the parents can take them somewhere where they won't disturb others. Of course, that would mean the parents having to forego their lie-in . . . There are plenty of daylight hours in the summer for kids to play out in, and it won't do them a jot of harm, and probably a lot of good, to teach them to be considerate of others unlike their selfish parents.

apostropheuse · 09/05/2013 22:12

Children who are up early enough to be out playing in their garden at 7.30am are likely in bed early in the evening. So, if their parents keep them in the house until the neighbours think it's acceptable will those same neighbours keep all noise down and stay out of their gardens when the children go to bed at perhaps 7pm? I would doubt that very much.

AThingInYourLife · 09/05/2013 22:23

"If it's so essential for them to be outside at this time, then the parents can take them somewhere where they won't disturb others."

Why should I?

I bought a house with a garden so we could enjoy spending time in our garden.

I don't expect my neighbours to stay out of their garden when my kids are asleep.

"I work hard, and I deserve a lie in sometimes."

:o

My kids don't owe you silence until late on Sunday morning.

The people who live near the park also work hard. Why should they have the sounds of all the neighbourhood children inflicted on them every weekend?