We need a "proper" reality cooking show

[IsItMeOr]

Where you realise that the pan you need is dirty from the other day, DC want to "help" and/or the cbeebies programme they're watching runs out before you've finished.

And you haven't got all the ingredients.

Good idea. Extreme Cooking. I'd like to see Gordon Ramsey deal with that.

Where you can only cook if you can cook while dancing to entertain the baby that doesn't like being put down...

there could be a one-handed round

Ooh, you have to watch the Watson and Oliver sketch about this very thing! Genius! "I didn't have time to go to the shops, so instead of apples in my apple pie, I'm using grapes."

And one where the kids snaffle the salami you've just sliced, or you have to peel massive numbers of carrots because the dcs are eating them as fast as you can peel them.

And the one where you've slave away for hours and your child ends up eating nothing but dry cornflakes

And the dog leaps up and steals the chicken breast so you are one short and have to chop the remaining ones and improvise 'stir fry chicken pieces' instead.

And you have to help 2 dcs with different homeworks (one of whom is having a tantrum because they say it's too difficult) at the same time as cooking.

OMG I was just thinking this as I went to put together my lasagne to find I had no lasagne noodles.

Do that Masterchef. Recipe is almost finished, remove one ingredient, find a sub in 5 minutes...GO!

What on earth are lasagne noodles?

I think we need one that shows the bloody basics. I've kids over who have been shocked to bits when I've sent mine into the garden for veg. I have one who comes regularly because she's only ever had her fish pie in a microwave packet, same with her spag bol. She likes my cooking! I have had kids for baking days who've never made a cake from scratch. It's scary!

YABU. As entertaining as your idea sounds, the last thing we need is yet another cooking programme.

You know...lasagne noodles

I'm confused, do you mean sheets? I thought noodles were long and string like. We use lasagne sheets here. Is it me?

Ooo, just realised it's a link, doh!
Sheets it is, we just have different words for it!

One where you realise you have run out of sugar so thinking how bad can it be you omit it from the apple, crumble topping AND the custArd!

The lasagne noodle confusion has given me another idea:

at least one of the ingredients is in a packet in a language you don't speak

God, wouldn't it be great to have a live Masterchef final?! One hour to make two amazing dishes. I'd love to see it all properly taking shape.

When you have to stop every five minutesto help with homework/music practice/bum wiping/refereeing/laundry. Like a Ready Steady Cook meets the Crystal Maze.

I like the one handed whilst holding the baby challenge, how about with the added twist of using the wrong hand, lefties use right, righties use left!

Cloudsandtrees you're right, of course.

It just struck me while cooking tea, of course.

And instead of a pristine work surface with all the ingredients neatly laid out ready prepared, there's barely an inch to spare in between all the dirty dishes/stuff for recycling waiting to be washed out.

Don't forget that when they have spent hours slaving over a dish, the judges will push it away, telling the contestant, "You know I HATE ingredient X (where ingredient X is one they raved about and loved only yesterday)!

And first you have to race around the house and FIND the crucial utensil, which may be in a toybox, may be in the garden, may be in the toddler's bed from when they were cuddling it last night.

jojane I remember a school friend telling me that her mum made crumble without fat and sugar once. Yes, that would be FLOUR.

Liking the one-handed while holding baby challenge. I was very adept at that when DS was small. Marks deducted if you drop/cook baby, of course.

This is shaping up quite nicely!

Yes, lasagne sheets. Also known as noodles.